Dont Kw Wut to Do...

Updated on September 02, 2010
M.A. asks from Plano, TX
18 answers

i just had a sonogram i am 10 weeks pregnant, the doctor told that i they found a lot of liquid around my babys head and neck... they said that finding it this early in pregnancy is really dangerous for the baby and that i had a chance of having a misscarriage or that they can do some test and i can have an abortion.... i wanna kw if maybe just maybe the liquid can go away over time.

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M.D.

answers from Dallas on

I would get a second opinion. I am a sonographer, most things can not be diagnosed at 10 weeks. Ask to be referred to a Perinatologist. They can do a level 2 sono and give you more information. Message me if you want a referral in the Irving/Las Colinas area. Good Luck!

Updated

I would get a second opinion. I am a sonographer, most things can not be diagnosed at 10 weeks. Ask to be referred to a Perinatologist. They can do a level 2 sono and give you more information. Message me if you want a referral in the Irving/Las Colinas area. Good Luck!

2 moms found this helpful
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M.S.

answers from Dallas on

It seems like you need to have some more tests done before you know enough to make a good decision. If it truly is a terrible fetal defect, then I would abort rather than go through the pregnancy waiting for a miscarriage or a still birth, but that's up to you.

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J.S.

answers from Tampa on

sorry for your bad news. but stay calm, because a stressing mommy is not good for the baby. i've been in your shoes, only i was 21 weeks. the sonogram showed fluid around my baby's abdomen, so they sent me to a perinatologist to get a level 2 ultrasound with contrast the next day. they also did an amniocentisis with a fish test to see if it was a chromosome problem. unfortunately the following ultrasound (3 days later) showed no heartbeat. my baby girl suffered from something called hydrops. she had fluid around all of her internal organs, including her brain. the doctors told me that if, by some miracle, i carried her full term she would only have a 5% chance of living outside of the womb and would basically be a vegetable at the most.
i don't tell you my story to scare you, i tell you because i know the fear you are feeling right now. what the sonogram is showing is a very serious thing. i would ask for a referral to a perinatologist and get another sonogram and an amniocentesis if its possible. the fish test is a strain of the amnio that gets results quicker than the full amnio. it can clue the doctors in on something that may be fixable sooner. when you're pregnant, every second counts. don't waste time, call your doctor and get in with a specialist. don't accept an abortion, God and your body know what's best for that baby. if you are ment to lose this baby, God forbid, a miscarriage will be the healthiest way.
you'll be in my prayers, good luck!

6 moms found this helpful
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S.B.

answers from Redding on

Get a second opinion or wait a couple more weeks for another ultrasound.
I was hemorhagging when I was in my early pregnancy with my son and they told me it wasn't a viable pregnancy. Well, guess what? He's 15 now, perfectly normal and healthy in EVERY way. He never so much as had ear infections or a food allergy.
I don't know why someone would suggest an abortion based on one ultrasound. Even though they told me I was losing my baby, they did more tests and he wasn't going anywhere.
He is living proof that early tests aren't always accurate.

Get another test. Get another doctor if you have to.

6 moms found this helpful

J.B.

answers from Houston on

I just want to say I am so sorry that you are in this spot. I know it is overwhelming. I would say hold off. I have a good friend whose daughter was just told that her unborn baby had a terminal condition so they ordered and amniocentesis, you know this test where they stick a needle in the mom's belly to test the amniotic fluid...anyway, after all that the results came back that the baby is fine! So ultrasound is not perfect. I have another friend who was told her baby had a dent in his head by the ultrasound tech, everyone was all worried, baby came out fine is a healthy five year old today. They really thought my fluid levels were low when I was pregs but you know, they were fine. I will say I don't know about this thing they have told you, but I have been told twice I was going to deliver big babies, which I did not, and the stories I have listed above are not the only ones I know of where ultrasound has been wrong. I truly hope you do not miscarry and if you can, my advice is just to continue enjoying being pregnant. Ultrasound is by no means and exact science, it is just a tiny window into the womb that gives a bit of insight, nothing more. Hang in there and don't let anybody scare you into an abortion. You loved this baby before the ultrasound and nothing has changed. I wish you all the best and I will pray for both of you:)

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J.J.

answers from Minneapolis on

Sonograms are not always accurate and cannot detect everything. If you end up having a miscarraiage, then you know that is what was meant to happen. But to have an abortion because something "might' happen just saddens me. That is ridiculous! If you need to get a second opinion, then do that, but I see no need to terminate the pregnancy because of this.

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T.C.

answers from Dallas on

I would get a 2nd opinion. I know it may be "risky," but if you have the abortion you'll never find out if there was a "miracle" about to happen. If there's a chance for miscarriage, I would wait and see if a miscarriage was going to happen or not.
That's JMO. I know it is scarey though. I don't know what they are saying it could be, but if they are mentioning hydrocephalus, that is something that can be drained and cared for fairly easily once the baby is born and sometimes they even do a surgery for it inutero................
If you want this baby, don't give up on it quickly.

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S.M.

answers from Asheville on

Some good advice below. Most of all, take care of yourself, work with your doc and ask your doc all the questions you have. I'd be careful about reading too much online as there's a lot of stuff that's not accurate and there's no sense in adding more pressure. Take care.

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A.R.

answers from Dallas on

Just gotta say, my aunt was told the same thing and her baby ended up coming out NORMAL and with our "ellison"(my family) big head! Another friend of mine had SEVERAL sonograms, them telling her that she was having a GIRL, she ended up having a BOY. -not at all the same, but generally stating that they can't see everything and yes technology is great but not always right.
AND even if this comes out being what they say, wouldn't you want to give it every chance it had at least to see? Whats the worst that could happen? That it would die?-it'll be gone with the abortion either way. I know harse words to say, but in this situation I say regardless of what the tests say-give it a chance!
Do some rubbing on your belly and praying over your babe.
good luck!

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S.T.

answers from Dallas on

There are too many stories of babies being born fine after the doctor told them horrible news base on the sonogram. Get a second opinion. Pray. Don't make a rash decision. You can wait a few more weeks and do another sono. You can't put the baby back in after you have an abortion.

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K.V.

answers from Dallas on

Your doctor is required to tell you the answer to this question! It is called informed consent. You have the right to know. However, you can do your own research on the internet.

With an issue as important as this, I would go to another doctor unrelated to this practice and don't tell them what you have been told and see what they find.

If it were me, I would do a lot of praying and just wait. From what you have said, it sounds like the worst thing that can happen is that you have a misscarriage. I would just wait and see wha happens. Having an abortion is out of the question for me. It is a doctor's decision to end this life you carry. I would wait to see what God has in store for your baby's life.

Hope this helps you think this through.

K. Voigtsberger
www.wholeheartbirth.com

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T.V.

answers from San Francisco on

Dear M.,

It sounds like your doctor was very honest with you today. Did he/she tell you the second test would be for Downs Syndrome? If you were unable to ask every question that you need to ask, I would go right back in and let them know you need to talk and/or get a referral to a specialist if you don't have confidence in your present care.

I know you are frightened and upset right now, so try to calm youself and sit down and write a list of ALL your questions. If your husband, mom, sis or good friend can go with you, that might help you feel a little safer.

You will be in my prayers....God bless and keep you safe.

Blessings.....

1 mom found this helpful
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D.B.

answers from Dallas on

You've had some good responses on here, I'd just like to add my two cents.

First of all, any suggestion for an abortion because there "might" be something wrong makes no sense to me. Truly a lack of value of human life.

Second, as a mom of a special needs child I can understand going through a pregnancy in fear. My 3rd child showed short long-bones on ultrasound during pregnancy, indicating Down Syndrome. She is perfect and healthy, if a bit short. I then went on to have a noneventful pregnancy resulting in my third daughter, healthy and normal. My next pregnancy resulted in a miscarriage at 9 weeks, a horrible but blameless experience. My 5th child had short long-bones and a questionable nasal bone shown in ultrasounds, again indicating Down Syndrome. I was referred to a maternal fetal specialist ,and an amniocentesis was suggested several times during my pregnancy, but since we would never abort regardless of the diagnosis, we refused.

I asked my Dr. if he would treat my pregnancy any differently knowing that this child had a chromosomal abnormality and the answer was "no", so I didn't want to risk the miscarriage from the amnio (which I know is low, but it is still a risk). Our state of mind was that if this child only lived ten minutes outside the womb, we'll take our ten minutes and be grateful for it. God gives us everything for a reason.

Our child is 10 months old today. He has Pallister-Killian Syndrome, a very rare chromosomal abnormality. He does have medical issues, and is developmentally delayed, but I wouldn't change him. He is by far our easiest child, personality wise. To me, he is perfect. He has brought us closer to God, I've found out who our true friends are because of him, and I have met some really wonderful people through the PKS support group because of him. Like I stated before, God gives us everything for a reason.

I know the panic feeling of "trapped" by an abnormal pregnancy, the fear that I may not love this child the same if he/she isn't "normal", and every other rational or irrational feeling that goes along with an uncertain diagnosis.

My hope for you is that you are carrying a perfect "normal" child. But my long winded point is that if there is something going on with this child, I hope you find peace, love and acceptance in the gift that God has given you. God bless.

~D.~
"Everything does not have to be perfect to still be wonderful."

1 mom found this helpful

J.T.

answers from Dallas on

First: I am so sorry for what you are having to go through, I will put you on my prayer list.
Second: God is in control! I would pray a lot, call everyone you know, even people you don't (like churches you can go to their web site.
and last but not least: at the end of the day it is your decision. Pray, and then follow your heart.
The doctors didn't think my son would ever make it, and now he is almost 4 and perfect. I also have a friend that also had liquid. She was on bed rest But she has a beautiful little girl.

I am so sorry you are having to go through this. I will be praying for you.

GOD BLESS YOU !

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S.B.

answers from Dallas on

First, I'm so sorry that you are going through this. I'm sure it is scary and confusing and overwhelming. I agree with most of the comments below. It really is too early to make a decision, especially a drastic one. I would definitely get a second opinion from a specialist and a more detailed sonogram. It seems like an over-reaction to abort because their "might" be wrong with the baby. If I were in your position and chose to abort I think I would always wonder "what if." What if there wasn't something wrong with the baby? What if there was something wrong, but God decided to make a miracle out of the situation? What if the baby was born and had some struggles but turned out to be the best thing to ever happen to me?

I hope you are able to find some peace in your decision making.

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M.D.

answers from Dallas on

M.,

I know everything I have to say you have already heard. First off I will be praying for you. I understand the pain you are dealing with right now. When I was pregnant with my son the test results showed that he might have Trisomy 13 which is a fatal. In the end he did not have this and he is a healthy and beautiful 4 year old. Like many others suggested you should get a second opinon and I am suprised that your Dr. did not refer you to a perinatologist for a more detailed sonogram. Lastly abortion is an unnatural event that is done to your body and because of this there are many risk. A miscarriage is a natural event and though it is a very emotional event for you it is a safer event for your body and a much less traumatic event emotional as well. Remember God is in charge and has a plan for you and your child.

Psalm 139:16 your eyes saw my unformed body.
All the days ordained for me
were written in your book
before one of them came to be.

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C.H.

answers from Dallas on

This is the type of question that you should explore with your doctor or a second opinion from a specialist. Perhaps it puts your life in jeopardy. Who knows. If anyone says that it "just went away for them," they may have had a completely different condition that caused the same symptom. Please be careful and ask more questions of the doctors.

May God bless you, give you strength, intelligence, courage, and peace in your journey to discover all that you can and do what is best for you and your family. If you have a husband or close family member, you may want to take them with you to help absorb it all and talk about it with them.

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