Does Marriage Counceling Really Work?

Counseling DOES work if both people want it to.
You can really learn some great techniques for communicating and diffusing a situation before it escalates.
You both need to realize that money causes more problems and arguments than just about anything and when the funds are limited, it gets even worse. Stress causes people to say and do things they normally wouldn't instead of just talking it through and finding solutions that work.

Counseling is ALWAYS worth a try.
That's my opinion.

Best wishes!

It absolutely works. There is a program called "Texas Twogether" or something like that that offers FREE marriage counseling and workshops. Licensed counselors volunteer their time, so you get the same advice only free. Just google it. Hope things get better!

I had all the paperwork filled out and one foot out the door when I agreed to wait 6 months to leave, and during that time attend marriage counseling with my husband. That was 2 1/2 years ago. It not only works, it saved my marriage.

YES - and I wasn't a big fan of counseling either!

RE: the money some work on sliding scales based on your income (if your insurance won't pay). OR try a faith based one w/ a church... I don't think they charge.

RE: the poster who said both people have to be vested is RIGHT on... otherwise you're throwing your money away. Good luck!

I have seen marriage counseling save marriages and I have seen marriage counseling fail. When it worked, both the wife and husband put everything into it, had an open mind, and 100% wanted to repair heir marriage. When it failed...one or both wasn't putting everything into it, one or both was closed off and cold, and one or both didn't truly want to repair the marriage.

The point is, you HAVE to both want the same thing. If one, or both of you don't truly want to mend your marriage...counseling probably won't work. Both should stick it out though, by the end of the counseling your eyes and hearts might be opened. It is WONDERFUL help, when the help is accepted!!

Yes! Saved our marriage.

The counseling is hard, it is scary and at one point we quit and decided to get a divorce.. We went outside and started talking about getting a divorce.. we talked for about 2 hours and realized, we had not said one mean thing to each other, we had not felt attacked by the other.. we had learned to talk WITH each other instead of TO each other.. We made a plan, went home and have now been married almost 30 years.

We have "safe words" that lets the other know they are on our last nerve..

We have no hidden agendas.. We try not to set up each other for fights.

We realized we do not always have to like the same thing or do things together... Imagine that? We accept each other for who and what they are. Good, bad, ugly.

And we help each other when the other needs help.. We ask for help or support from each other.. We ASK for what we want and need. We do not expect the other to read our minds.

We do not take each other for granted and we totally trust each other.

Yes, IF you BOTH want to stay together and you want to make the marriage work.
There can not be a third person in the relationship(girlfriend, boyfriend).

Not sure, I've no experience with it BUT I know that financial stress IS the leading cause of divorce so what about getting a financial game plan together a la Dave Ramsay and see those worries melt away? Just get O. of his books (free) from the library. Couldn't hurt, right? Good luck!

I'm sure the right counselor could help, but if your conflict is mostly due to financial worries, I don't think shelling out a bunch of money for counseling is a good idea. They are usually not cheap.

ABSOLUTELY.
You need 1) a competent and caring therapist,
2) each person should be sincere and willing to work
with the therapist and the process.
It can require trying on new behaviors
and new ways of interacting with one another.
Good luck!!

With the right person, it can be phenomenal. But it has to be the right person for BOTH spouses... and it can take a bit of "shopping" to find that person.

I think it is tough to find a decent counselor that understands male/female differences because from my experience, a lot of the females only had a female perspective and wanted the man to think and act like a woman too.

Not trying to be negative. I would try a church counselor because I think they are free, but even if you pay, divorce is way more expensive than marriage counseling.

Having an impartial mediator facilitate communication between you and your husband to talk about the underlying issues y'all are having is always a good thing. Sometimes it's hard to see the other persons point of view without the aid of that impartial person. If you want your marriage to work, do everything you can to make that happen. Don't quit, and remember why you fell in love with him to begin with. That person still exists, you just may need a professional to help you find him.

We've done it and it seems to have worked for us. Believe me we were in a BAD place.

I will warn you, the first few sessions were hard. The truth of what the other person really things can hurt, so be ready.

Find someone that can work for both of you. Also, you both have to be on board with the idea.

Best of luck!

Absolutely......go with a referral though.

Ditto Bug B.

My Hubby and I, had marriage counseling before. Did not help.
Because.... either one of us, at varying times... did not really want the counseling or did not believe in it.
Hence, it did not work.
In our case.

We are still married.... despite our issues prior.

My husband and I have been through marriage counseling once, and then done counseling seperatly and together about some family issues that kind of turned into marriage counseling as well. For us it saved our marriage. I have no doubt of that. If you are both willing to work at it and work with the counselor I KNOW it can work. For us we mostly had to learn how to deal with our own issues so we could communicate to each other. We spent a lot of time learning about our personalities, how we communicate and taking that into communicating with each other.

I know finances put a strain on any marriage. Good luck and I hope that things get better for you!!

Haven't used it, but my mother is a marital therapist. She works 60 hours per week. If it didn't work, she wouldn't be nearly so busy.

The trick is finding one who works for you both.

Good luck.