My boyfrienda and I have a 6 month old son. We are trying to raise him together while we both work full time. Things have been getting harder since I went back to work and we are fighting a lot about the logisitcal things--lifestyle. I feel like we love each other very much and both want this to work. I am going to suggest tonight that we go to counseling, but I wonder--does that EVER work? Will it make ANY difference? I am in need of some success stories--has anyone's relationship improved by going?
Also, we are in the city--anyone have recommendations? We need someone who isn't too expensive.
THANK YOU!
M.:
for counseling to work you both have to be willing to be open/ honest and want to work at it... relationships are not easy.
you also have to find the right person to work with...
two suggestions:
Dale Gody: ###-###-####
Zena Handlon: ###-###-####
P., RLC, IBCLC
Pres. Lactation Support Group, Inc
www.lactationsupportgroup.com
Hi M.,
Counseling does give insight, depending on all parties involved. I don't know what your spiritual background is or your boyfriends, but you can't expect to build a house with no foundation. You have to make sure you lay the proper groundwork before you began to build anything. Although some have tried to build without the proper foundation and they actually have the house built, but when you look closely you will see the cracks in the wall because it wasn't built on solid ground. M. if you guys believe in God, please consider knocking what you've already built down and putting in place a great solid foundation for a secure and strong home. This is not a judgement, please don't take it that way, this is truly the abc's of any and all relationships. warm regards, L.
Yes, I think it can help.
I also know that although my husband and I were pretty smug about our really strong and loving relationship before we had kids, the first year of parenthood and all the extra work and stress and financial pressures took a real toll. It's hard not to take out all the frustration on each other. (We still have a really strong and loving relationship, but we are no longer smug about it because we know how much work it can be!) Best wishes to the three of you.
Yes, I would say it does. My husband and I went to counseling and although it was tough at times it was very beneficial to our relationship. We both feel that it helped us understand each other better even when we didn't necessarily agree with what we were each feeling or saying.
I will say that it was hard at first to get my husband to understand that it would be a positive thing for us; for some reason most men aren't into the counseling "thing". Hopefully he cares enough to really listen to you and know that you are speaking from your heart.
We live in the city and our counselor was in the city a couple of days a week (burbs on the others), her office was at Wabash and Randolph (I believe) and her name is Joan Ross. She was fantastic and I've actually sent other people to her and they loved her as well.
Counseling does work for many couples who are willing to reconsider the way they are with each other, and wish to develop better habits of communication. It does not usually work if (a) one of the two partners has one foot out the door and is using arguments and fights to justify the reason they want to leave the relationship, or (b) if one of the partners has a serious addicion problem and is unwilling to deal with it, or (c) if one of the partners is involved in an affair and is neither willing to admit it nor leave the affair. In any case, counseling will help expedite the resolution (reconciliation or separation) of the situation, and will spare the child from being exposed to arguments and stress at home.
I use a combination of cognitive behavioral and family systems approach to couples therapy. I help couples identify common wishes, goals and hopes, as well as areas of disagreement and conflict, and I show them ways to improve their communications with each other that increase positive experiences in the relationship on a daily basis.
I am willing to see couples on a sliding scale basis, and if you want to contact me, I have openings at my downtown office (233 East Erie) on Thursdays and Fridays.
Ioanna Chaney, LCSW, CPCC, MBA
Psychotherapist & Certified Life Coach
233 East Erie Street, Suite 608, Chicago
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i sent you a private message i hope it helps
C.
Yes it does.And can do wonders if you are ready to really sit down and try to hash things out. I recomend it to anyone. I think that it is the greates thing and that everyone should go. It is an outsider who is not biased, giving you an opinion, which, I think is always needed! I would go... good luck.
B.
