Your son and my sons could form the "cuddle on my terms" club!
When it comes to restless sleeping for the non-cuddler, I recommend two things. First, consider giving your baby a does of baby tylenol (or whatever pain killer you use). This might make him feel a bit more comfortable and, thus, less restless since he's cutting teeth. If you've ever tried to sleep with a toothache, you know just how difficult it is. I understand that we don't want to overmedicate our children but I also think there's a time to ponder, "If I wouldn't put up with this, why should my kid?" In fact, that was my guiding question, if whatever-it-was was something I was comfortable living with, then I would try to have my kids tough it out. If it was something I would take medicine for, then I would dose my kids.
If you're truly against that (and some moms are, and that's ok), then my second suggestion is for you turn the monitor down so it doesn't distract you from your sleep. Keep the monitor up only as much as you need to hear a big cry, not the restless noises.
I learned the hard way that sometimes the mom we want to be is the not the mom our kids need. My eldest refused to be rocked to sleep, preferring to put himself to sleep. My youngest has never been big on kisses. He likes what my family calls "Eskimo kisses" (where you rub the tips of your noses together). So, my baby gets all the Eskimo kisses he wants and I've learned to not feel rejected that he's not more demonstrative. <sigh> I keep telling myself I should be the mom they NEED, not what I need.
I hope this helps a bit. That helpless feeling is hard. I get it. Explore alternatives and see what works. I think some of our most inspired moments in parenting are when we think outside the box for new solutions.
Good luck!