Divorce Shower for a Friend???

I love this idea, I think you should go for it! With divorce being such a hard time for most, bringing out the positive and focusing on the good is a great idea. :)

I think that is a lovely idea, personally. When I got divorced my friends were so supportive and helpful, it really made a huge difference. As far as TF saying that after 18 years you 'should have accumulated enough' - that is so untrue.

Sometimes in a divorce, you would be amazed at the things a spiteful spouse will take just to keep you from having them! I am not saying this should be about gifts- but she may need a toaster, a new frying pan, a bookshelf, etc. Just little things like that can be such a help! Or suggest everyone offer her an 'IOU' to help with moving, rewriting her resume, apartment hunting, etc.

But the main thing is to gather her friends together and show her that she is loved and supported in this difficult time - and that life is still fun and that things CAN and WILL get better. Believe me, I do not know what I would have done during my divorce without the support of my friends and family! I say it's a great idea and go for it!!

I think that it is a lovely idea to get together to support a friend in her tough transition. If she already has a place, it could be a house warming. I would shy away from calling it a divorce shower, and maybe call it a friend warming or something that puts the focus on her new life rather than the breakdown of her former one. All the family and friends I have known that have gone through divorce have felt it to be a failure (either directly on their part or some deeper seated failure in judgment), so if you can keep the word divorce out of the festivities, I think that would be better.

I think its a great idea. After my divorce, I didn't want to keep ANYTHING that I "shared" with my ex. I have slowly replaced everything myself figuring "out with the old, in with the new". So I think it would be wonderful to replace the old things with new things. Good for you for being so supportive, a lot of my friends freaked out and I was on my own.

Maybe a housewarming party instead? Let friends know the type of stuff that she needs, or just have it be a gathering of friends to show support.

I agree with a housewarming party. We should never put "divorce" in a positive light.

I understand where you are coming from as a friend and being supportive. That is very kind of you.

I've never heard of a divorce shower and don't think I'd be too keen on that, attending or hosting.

After 18 yrs, you've accumalated enough (or should have).

I think it's a great idea...A. a chance to get together with friends she may not have been able to be with as often as she would have liked...B. A chance to look at the future more positively....C Like you said, a chance to get things she may lose in the process...

We weren't married, but me & my significant other split after living together for 10+ years & he took every tool / manly item from the house even if I was the one who paid for it...frustrating

I like the gift cards idea...what a better way to start over than a shopping spree...even a small one....

Depending on your group, I've seen divorce parties at comedy clubs, of course strip clubs, what about a nice Panera lunch, maybe mani/pedis...could get costly for guests, though...I think anything will be enjoyable

She's lucky to have you for a friend!

i think it sounds awesome! really, it wouldnt be much different then a house warming party for her new place, it would just be celebrating the REASON why she is getting a new place! i say go for it!

Welcome friend to the EX-perience. Check out www.divorceshowerstore.com

My ex and I divorced after 16 years of marriage. We shared custody 6 months/6 months and I moved out of the home (because I knew I couldn't make the payments on my own). I didn't want to take anything from the house because I didn't want to take anything from my kids (the first 6 months they were with him). So I ended up getting an apartment and starting ALL over...towels, dishes, pots, pans, EVERYTHING. It was a big financial strain and without the help of one very good friend I don't know if I would have made it. I think it's a wonderful idea...call it whatever you like...just do it. She will be grateful and is lucky to have a friend like you.

Wow, even the name seems harsh. But since this is really a house warming party, it is a great thing. Everyone should have one of those when they move into a new home. I suggest going but not to embrace in any talk about slamming marriage. We should lift up our spouses, even the one she just left.

I've never heard of a divorce shower (then again most of my friends are married). However, I think it's a great idea. What a great way for her to start her new stage of life!

I've heard of them, and have heard they can be lots of fun!

http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/183421/how_to_th...

http://www.ehow.com/how_###-###-####_select-divorce-party...

2 diff sites with ideas

Huzzah! Good for you!!

I've been to several divorce parties... they're a lovely way to show support for someone you care about.

I would stay away from physical gifts, and go with giftcards, since she's probably going to be sorting/ packing until she's ready to scream.

Although the housewarming party might appear more tasteful in some ways, I feel that what you are trying to achieve is a celebration of your friend's birth into a new and more independent life. The Navajo have a tradition that is similar to a baby shower, but has more of a sacred and healing aspect to it. It is called a Blessingway ceremony.

There are also many Right of Passage ceremonies from a variety of religious and cultural traditions. I think it would be sweet to gather ideas from these sorts of celebrations and ceremonies that would be most meaningful to your friend and custom design the occasion. You can call it a Second Right of Passage, a Blessingway, a Shower, or something else altogether. It could be called an Adventure Party or a New Life Party, for example. Since most people feel a bit fallen or defeated after a divorce, it might best be called a Catching Party, because it shows your friend that her friends and/or family is there to catch her or help support her during challenging times.

What ever you call it, please do it. Your friend is very blessed to have such a sweet group of friends!