L.H.
My six year old has just started witrh her power play and talking back. I have been kindly saying: "I can't allow you to speak to me like that." If you are unhappy about something I've asked you to do, you need to understand that I have to make some choices for you until you can do it on your own." If you've asked her to, clean up something and she back talks, remind her that you need her help and that its important for her to learn how to help out. I remind my children that sometimes they will be in situations that require them to help out. I tell them that my hope for them is that they will look around the situation and say : What can I do to help", then do it. Calm conversations about the guide work that you are doing for her will bring her into the circle of understanding. When my daughter keeps it up, I have her sit out for 10 mins, then back to it. I keep calm and don't let her see that she has pushed my buttons. It just doesn't give her the message I want her to have. My three children are my biggest lessons in how to deal with people who don't agree and to get through it without loud drama.
It just takes practice.
Breathe deep and know that you can do this to help her on her way to being her best self. Good luck!
L.