My husband and I thought it adorable when our three year old daughter would pretend that she was Nemo and she would assign us roles like Marlin or Dory, or she would pretend to be a dog and we were the mommy dog and daddy dog. Lately it has been a little mind boggling with how often she is changing her roles. At one moment she says she is a kitty, so we'll say come here kitty and she'll look at us and say no I'm a bear. Has anyone else dealt with an issue like this with their children? Is it better to play along with them or to start ignoring all of these roll plays? It is cute but driving us a little crazy!
Thank you so much for the advice of asking my daughter to describe herself more as to what she looks like and what she does. I have recognized her role play as an amazing imagination but it has become difficult when she seems to change it every minute. By getting her to think more about what she is just might get her to focus on one role a little longer and let her know mommy is really paying attention. I can't wait to try it out! Thanks!
Hi B....
My son is 4 years old and does the exact same thing. He goes between a dinosaur, lion, and a puppy. He is sure to correct us if we call him the wrong one. He too, will be oneone minute and the next he is something else. Not once have I ever thought about it being anything wrong. It is more of a pain in the butt sometimes then anything. Good luck!
Yes, our three year old girl does this too. Not too often but I've noticed it before. Their little minds are all over the place and so creative. I think kids outgrow it, but if it gets out of hand which it may be for your family you might want to try enforcing a choice for a period of time. Would it help if you had your child pick something and set a timer for a minute. When the timer goes off your child can pick the next thing.
Ah yes, the role playing. My 4 year old started that around 3 and hasn't stopped since. It shows their imagination, etc. I encourage this kind of play. When she switches what she is ask her things to get her mind working like "what color bear are you?" "How big are you?" "How is a bear different from a kitty?" "what do you eat?" the possibilities are endless. If my son keeps switching back and forth and doesn't tell us in between I just tell him I didn't know he was a kitty because he didn't tell me, etc.
I think this is just something you should ride the wave on. Encourage her & engage her. Imagination and creativity are great skills to have in life.
Well, I personally wouldn't ignore the roll play, because it is a great way to use her imagination and it is part of communicating at that age.
I would just let her direct the roll play, and let her indicate what she is and what you are during play. Little kids can go through a lot of thoughts very quickly and it may just be that she is saying out loud all the choices she is thinking about, or hasn't been able to settle on what character she is going to be, or just likes to change her mind a lot.
Instead of saying, "come here kitty" you could say, "Oh are you a kitty?" or "what are you now?" But I think just being quiet until she settles in to a role or asks you to do or be something would be easier for you.
I don't have any sort of education in child psychology, so I can't say for certain that this isn't an indicator of some problem, but I wouldn't worry myself unless she exhibits other worrisome signs or odd behaviors too. I would guess it is more likely just a phase. It's hard to know what is really going through a kid's mind. You don't sound like you are worried about it, but if you did become worried, you could always ask a pediatrician about it too.
B., it is perfectly normal that she is pretending to be different characters. my two (3 and 4) do it all day long. just as i was typing this up my 4 year old son came down to me with his flashlight and was asking about some tracks, in a soft voice. so i knew he was pretending something. so i asked if they were bear tracks. he said no they were dinosaur tracks. 'oh,, wow, dinosaur tracks'.. and he was asking about if i knew where they went.. we had a few exchanges about him tracking a dinosuar then he said he thought it was upstairs and was gonna go look. and i told him i would keep an eye out here in case it came back here..lol lol lol i find it fun. it sure shows how creative they are. i remember growing up my parents didn't play with me like that. and made me feel like i was silly for having this imagination. so now when i get to play like this with my kids it is so much fun. they are so creative and bright. maybe instead of focusing on how it irritates you , try to focus on how bright and creative she is being with her story telling. she's actually creating a whole story from nothing or something she remembered.
but bottom like it's very normal, even the changing of characters quickly. my two do that alot too..lol lol
if you don't feel comfortable, either talk to your pediatrician or look for a parents magazine like Parents or Parenting.
Good luck
T.
Dear B.,
First of all, KUDO'S for all of the wonderful advice! My son is 18 and my daughter will be turning 17 at the end of next month and, reading your request took me back down memory lane for the moment! Thank You! It does seem like it "Was only Yesterday" when my little daughter both delighted and annoyed me with "role playing". Her favorite was "Waitress". She would carry a small note pad and pencil and take our order, sometime's insisting that "That isnt on the menu." LOL The biggest laugh I ever got was when she collected some clothes pin's from Grandma and began cleverly clipping "the orders" onto the lampshade and spinning it around to the pretend cook!
Your daughter is perfectly normal... Enjoy it while it lasts!
C. M.
