Daughter's Father/behavior

You keep trying, don't give up. Eventually, Dad is going to insult one of their friends or boy friends and he's going to not be so popular anymore because he's rude. Been there.....so like I said, just hang in there and keep doing what you are doing.

I had a very similar situation, although I divorced him when my daughter was 3, but he continued to be a regular fixture in her life. She even lived with him for a year when she was 12. Please whatever you do, DON"T GIVE UP, trying to undo what he does. You might try telling him, that they will not have any respect for him as they get older and realize his behavior. I never gave up trying to instill in my daughter the good morals and manners. ANd respect. I tried to show her by by being an example. And it did pay off. She is 30 years old now and rarely sees her father. ( they are not estranged just strained). She loves him. But she has told me how grateful she is that I never GAVE up on her. At the time she didn't like it and at times I was Hated. But I didn't want her to turn out like that. She has a Bachelor's degree in computer science, a wonderful husband, and she is living a clean and decent life, and I get to talk to her almost every day. So Please whatever you do, constantly talk to them, about morals and values and dicuss what it means to be a good person. And NEVER talk badly about thier father to them, that is counterproductive. If they talk bad about him just listen don't join in. My daughter said she really respected me for not talking about her father in a bad way. I don't know if you are religious, but the Bible has many stories about respect, Or even magazines and books could start a conversation with them. Ask them what they think it means, do they want it and do they want to give it. Maybe that will get them thinking and maybe they can change thier DAd's mind about being disrespectful to others. It is not funny and he certainly wouldn't like being disrespected himself, I am sure.

Are you still married to him? If so, ask him why it's so important that he talks bad about other people. Inform him it's a big telling sign that he is insecure himself and that he's really setting a terrible example for his children.

You can't change your husband. Don't try to change him. Just continue to teach and model the behavior you want for your girls.

I know it's next to impossible to ignore such obvious disrespectful behavior but it's essential for both yours and your daughter's emotional health that you do. It's especially important to not argue with him in front of the girls and to not "bad mouth" him. It's OK to acknowledge his lack of respect in a respectful way. As Page said truth is different than being mean. That is a difficult distinction to make sometimes. We notice the difference when we're able to say in a neutral voice that someone is rude. When we say it in a sarcastic or angry tone we are then mean.

If your girls comment, sympathize with them. Let them know you don't approve of their father's words and actions. Show them by your own words and actions that you all can live differently than he does.

If you model appropriate behavior, as well as matter of factly telling your daughter that her father's trashy talk is nasty, she will probably learn what she needs to know. You can tell her certain truths about her father without being mean about him.

Nothing can change unless it's discussed. I had to talk to my husband about his language when the kids were really young. He figured that it didn't matter because they were 15 months old and a newborn at the time, but even though he didn't think it mattered, I told him it mattered to me and he stopped

Tell him he is setting the example for the kind of men his daughters will bring home. If they think that kind of behaviour is okay they will not stand up for themselves and be disrespected in their relationships. If he does not want his daughters to be treated that way, he should not treat others that way. The other thing is that he is teaching them to be 'mean girls', pardon the pun. Is he desrespectful to you as well?

Well ask him how he would feel if someone direspected him in public in front of his girls.{maybe try this if he truly loves his daughters}!!! How would he feel if they came home crying from school,party, what have u & there heart was broke into because the kids made fun of them and him too!! He needs to put hiself in everybody eles's shoes.Tell him u want ur daugters to respect others. Because what go's around comes around. He might wined up disable someday we never know how would it like the tables to be truned on him i hope this helps just my advice Help!!

STAND YOUR GROUND, SISTER!!!! YOUR DAUGHTERS WILL THANK YOU FOR IT! At some point, they'll not want to be around their father because of his lack of maturity and disrespect. NOT the kind of male role model young girls need.

In addition, I'd tell the girls that THEY need to start speaking up, too. This is NOT being disrespectful. It's standing up for what is RIGHT and honors them and others. Otherwise, at that age, saying nothing is the same as approval. People who stand up for their beliefs and WHAT IS RIGHT stand a FAR LESS chance of getting disrespected and walked over by others and future boyfriends, etc.

Otherwise, they just think it's "normal" and take it! They need to TELLl their father that they need a role model who knows how to treat people with honor and respect (including you and them).