Daughter Fights Sleep

Hi Brooke-

I had some of the same issues. Then I visited a friend and her kids were in bed by 7:30 and slept till 7a.m. I followed what she did and have had such success! Also read The Baby Whisperer Solves all your problems by Tracy Hogg. We took T.V. away from him, and cut down the bedtime routine. Bath, brush teeth, hugs to everyone then tell him to get in his bed read one short story and one kiss and one hug. No water no extra anything. The only thing we compromise on is getting out of bed to go to the potty.

We can now tell him to go to bed and he goes. This was not an easy task to accomplish. You have to be very committed and stay strong. We took control over a weekend. That was the worst weekend of my life. He was screaming at the top of his lungs and crying for momma. Every time he came out of his room we were firm and told him to go back in. If he wouldn't we would carry him in and put him down (no kisses, no hugging, no water, no talking, no reading). This lasted for hours. This was so hard on me, and I felt like the worst parent in the world. We also slept on the living room floor so when he got up in the middle of the night he would run right into us. This took three days of this sheer madness. I thought I was going to lose my mind. But now...utter peace. People come over and are amazed that he will go put himself to sleep. The peacefulness in our family now was well worth those horrible 3 days.

Also, we do not compromise and let him into our bed...ever. The book states not to let them back in because the cycle will start all over. We invested in a video monitor that we hooked up to the T.V. to see if he was going to get out of bed and if he was o.k. during this time. I hope this helps. Good luck

J.

My daugher has never been the best sleeper but we had a very simmilar issue at around 3 years old. I finaly stopped trying to make her nap and then she was really tired and would go to sleep around 7 much easier. Then after we were in a really good routine at bed time I noticed she would start to fall alseep in the car during the day so now I have started enforcing a nap but the nap has to be early if she sleeps to late then bed time gets more difficult. She has always stayed in bed but she calls out or cries for us alot at night. I tired alot but one day dad made a big deal about stopping the schwans guy to get some special popsicles. She loved them. So we told her that if she wanted to have one she had to sleep all night without calling for us. It seems to have worked for her. But it took us a long time to figure out her hot button. Sometimes she says she doesn't want a popsicle when she goes to bed but I stick to the routine and she still goes to sleep well. Good luck I know how hard it is when you don't get enough sleep.

Brooke,

I agree that it is all about enforcing the boundaries, but I wonder why the change in your daughter's behavior? You say that this just started a few months ago. What was she doing prior to that? It is that her behavior has changed or your expectations are different? Just not sure what is going on here. I do know that sleep disruption is really unhealthy for kids. It seems a little concerning to me that she is not getting enough sleep. In addition to looking at your routine and being consistent, you may want to see if there is any medical issue that is causing her to not have normal sleep. I feel for you! I went through a rough time with my daughter when we were transitioning her to sleeping in her own room and not getting a parent to attend to her every hour! It was brutal, but I swear it was worse being so tired that I couldn't thing straight anymore. Good luck and let us know what happens!

-Jen

I have done a combination of what jami did with her child and also that was the same time that my son started to not need a nap or not as long as before. If he had a nap then he wouldnt sleep until 10 oclock at night. He would be tired the next and then I wouldnt let him have a nap and by the time it was bedtime 8pm and we finished our bedtime stuff( which was shorten) He went to bed fine. SO the next day he woke up at 7:30 am and he wouldn't be tired. When nap time came again, we only had quiet time for an hour or so. This has been his routine ever since. Before we were doing the cycle you are currently doing, fighting at night to get to sleep and fighting during the day for the nap. I even remember the second day we had to fight to keep him up until 8 to make sure he didn't get up at 5 in the morning. It may seem a little young to no longer need a nap, but listen to your child and that may be it. She may not be tired.

This has also helped my son sleep better at night. He doesn't get up or cry or even try to get in the bed with us.(we never let either one of our children in bed with us. Another thing we tell our son is that he will be going to bed in 10 minutes, we always give the warning so he knows it's coming, and he'll say "okay mommy"(by the way, my children share a room so it's very easy for one to wake up the other becuase they are both light sleepers). One last thing, no child at this age wants to go to bed, they dont want to miss anything! They resist as mush as possible. I hope this helps, And JAMI has some really good advice.

N.,

sahm of a 3 1/2 year old and a 9 month old. :-)