Hello everyone, I am new to the group but excited. I need some advice on the following. We are getting custody of my husbands 16 daughter. Way excited! I would like to do something to welcome, celebrate, etc for her. Does anyone have ideas for things that we could do. Don't get to have baby shower for our new addition but would like to do something.
Let me add a little more information here. We have tried for over 10 years to get custody of both children. This was a total shock to us (good one but shock). We do not have any more children together or in the house. My step son has opted not to join her or have know part of this. I have already decorated her room but I was thinking of a party of some sort. She does not know alot of people other than family here but she lived 17 hours away. We only see her in the summer and my husband has not lived in the house with her since she was 3 months old. Ok sorry for the long post but maybe this will help.
She is majorly excited and at this point will not be going to visit anytime soon. Everyone involved here is absolutely shocked and way excited. Especially her and she has never gotten the love she deserves.
Can you take her shopping so she can choose some items for her room like a comforter or lamp, wall art, etc... Something so she gets to choose how her space looks. The shopping trip will be a bonding time. I don't think you have to go crazy and spend a lot of money either. I recently saw at Walmart comforters under $20.
Good luck! She is a lucky girl to have such a wonderful step mom that is welcoming her with open arms.
9 years ago, my husband and I got custody of his 2 children. At the time they were 6 and 8. It was in the summer, so we had a cook out/pool party with family and friends..... it was just more like a big get together in their honor. Everyone was excited to see them and it gave everyone a chance to visit. I would definelty do something exciting for her.
I love the idea of taking her and letting her pick out things for her room! Maybe, you go to her favorite restaurant, or let her have a few friends stay the night in her new room.
You didn't mention, if you have other children. If so, you might get them something special, so they don't feel awkward, or left out.
Updated: I saw you added more! You could have a small party w/ family and food. They could bring giftcards to a local mall, or favorite store, so she can go shopping. You could take her and get new clothes, a haircut, manicure, etc...so she feels great about herself. She could feel confident going to a new school and meeting new people.
Take her to a store and let her get some things within your budget to redo her room. She's a teen and this is permanent, so let her have a fun place that is all hers! Let her pick out a paint color and paint the whole room or a wall or something.
Ross, Marshalls, Home Goods, all have great deals and good ideas for a small room makeover.
congratulations. that is great news. at 16 she might not want to be the center of the party, but i would have some sort of celebrating highlighting her but not focusing on her exclusively.
M.,
A 10 year custody battle must have taken its toll on everyone envolved especially the children. Even if your step-daughter is as “excited’ as you are, this will still be a big adjustment for her. Do you think she will be missing her brother and/or mother? Will she be visiting them now? It's kind of like a divorce, even when you want it, it still sort of hurts.
I would suggest keeping her arrival low key for the first few weeks, giving her time to settle in to her new surroundings, home, school, church, town, etc.
I would also let her accessorize her room with things she has picked out. (sheets, comforter, lamps, towels etc.
Blessings.....
First congratulations .I think something like a welcome home party would be great when. Are there any children her age in the neighborhood has she had friends over before ?even invite your family members
Over that has kids take the time to introduce her to her new family
Show and give her lots of love that is the one thing she needs
Let it be her choice if she wants to call you mom I have a stepson the one thing I never ever do is talk bad about his mom in front of him
Because no matter how much she did him wrong that's still his mom
She hardly ever comes to see him or call she walked out and
Left him with his father when he was six months old
My husband let's her see him if she wants to but she doesn't but any how if you talk about the real parent it can back fire on you I basically
Bite my tongue when she does come around on rare occasions
