I prefice this by saying I am sorry if I offend anyone but I am so worked up about something that I thought I'd share it and hear your opinions. My husband has a friend who he spent a good portion of his childhood being raised in his friends' parents home. (My husband was orphaned at a young age) Anyways, this friend of his, whom I have become very close with over the years, recently got married. They conceived the wedding night (Less than 6 months ago) and she had the baby this evening after a scheduled induction which failed and then had a c-section. The baby apparently was born healthy and she is doing fine. Here is the catch. She is hemopheliac (sorry on the spelling) and she knew she was before the conception. She did not tell him until after they were married and expecting, when complications began to arise. They ultimately induced her because the baby was developing too quickly and the proteins were outrageously high in her fluids. I feel so mad at her for putting him through that and lying to him and potentially she could have died (the doctors warned her of that during the pregnancy) and left him with a child to care for with potential problems due to his prematurity. I am livid at her and do not know if I can even face her. How dare she make him be at that risk because she is so selfish. She told him that she would not use birth control becuase she wanted to have a child right away. He was not fond of the idea but not knowing all this, he agreed. Well, she got her way but at what cost? She is lucky that everything went ok and both she and her son is alive and well, but am I over reacting to feel like she is an ultimate self centered immature b_ _ ch? How do I come to terms with dealing with her and how do I calm down over caring for a very good friend of mine and my husband's? I just don't feel like it was right of her to make others possibly suffer or pay a hefty price for her behavior. I know there is nothing like birthing your own child but if there is such a severe risk how can one justify it? Again, I hope I don't offend anyone, I just need to vent and get some support from someone. By the way, my husband agrees with me that she is a pig but he thinks I'm being cold hearted with my reaction and that I shouldn't let it get to me.
N.,
Back away from this one. It is not your issue.
The mother and baby are ok, so be glad for that. Love that baby and be nice to his mother. If you don't, the husband and baby will know it.
Amy
Is sure is obvious how much you value the miracle of life.
You sound like a passionate woman with deep rooted loyalty. I will pray for the health of that little baby and his parents. I hope I can offer you some comfort in this frustrating time. I know it probably isn't the right time for you to hear this since you're so upset, but really, isn't everything ultimatley in God's hands? The Doctors told me that I wouldn't be able to carry a baby full term. I lost 6 tiny angels to 1st trimester micarriages. I never stopped believing that God didn't mean for me to be childless. I hope you can change your heart about this and offer support to this woman. She has to look into an incubater to see her tiny son. I wish peace for you. Be the example you want to see in others.
With prayers,
M.
I have a beautiful 10 month old son. I can't imagine a world without him. Perhaps, your friend's wife could not imagine her world without her baby. If your friend doesn't have a problem with his wife, you shouldn't either.
I agree with Amy. I know it's hard to step out of a situation that involves someone so near and dear to your heart. If your friend seems happy with the whole thing and not livid at his wife, then leave it be. Of course, if he isn't, and he blows up one day about his feelings, maybe you could be a mediator between the two when the sh-- hits the fan.
