HeMy husband was really mad at last night. I kind of think he is right to be upset with me. My oldest has a science
Test (5grade) anyhow he said I didnt complete some of the flashcards. He is right. Theree eere about 4flash cards I only half completed. He told he haas to everything like usual. I do my fairshare. It makes me feel completely incapable from his eyes. He m
akes mistakes also. He forgot to pick up our oldest child this week from school. The school callee me wondering what going on.
How horrible is this with flash cards. He is always so DIRE . If I wwould of forgotten topick up our son I would of received a lecture from him.I think I made a forgivable mistake. Our son receives mostly90s oon his practically weekly test.Is this horrible? I WAS NOT DOING MY SON HHOMEWORK I WAS HELPING HIM STUDY FOR SCIENCE TEST?He is taking the test today.
Also he is RARELY a yeller towards the kids but lsst night as I lay in bed I could hesr him screaminng at our son. I was scared to go downstairs. My son told me this morning he feels confident he knows the material. I apolized to my son for not completing the cards. I said its not your fault its mine fault . I help my younger son every day with homework. Everyday I check my older son homework. Then I make surehe put it in his folder then in his backpack. Then in the morning I check again. He has ADHD major focusing issues. I pick up and drve all 3of our kids every day. He works 6-7a wk. He most of the time picks up our son from school just on Wed.
How about this idea?
Put hubs in charge of ALL homework from now on--so it can be "his kind of perfect"!
And you be in charge of picking up from school? :)
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What's going on with your husband that he is so angry? That's what I would be investigating. This isn't about you or your son - it is not your fault. Sit down and talk with your husband at a quiet time.
Your husband is a bloody mental case. Is he drinking. How come you are too afraid to get out of bed and defend your son.
If your husband were mine I'd force him to get professional help or leave him. Please read other posts by adults who were scarred by screaming parents.
you and dad need to talk about sharing the responsibilities and you each should be in charge of the ones that are your strong points.
Gosh, hubby needs to take a chill pill (to quote my generation - LOL!). in the grand scheme of life what is four flashcards in the 5th grade. I guess I am wondering why the 5th grader didn't do the flashcards if an assignment - I don't know the details of the process, so I won't go into that too much:)
Sounds like he is trying to pull the superior card on you - geesh! When i see guys act like this it really makes my skin crawl - BUT that is not what you asked.
I would start keeping a "smile file" paper or electronic of all the good things that you do and note when folks take notice. "I am a great baker." "My kids cleaned their plates last night when i cooked." "We got to go tothe park twice this weekend!"
Pull it out, revel in all the good you do EVERY DAY. And follow the advice from South Pacific - Wash that man right out of your hair!
Have a better day!~
Why are you doing your sons homework? Shouldn't a 5th grader be capable of doing is own. My husband can do no wrong in his own eyes and it sounds like yours is the same way. Every mistake is forgivable!!!!! Tell your husband when he becomes perfect you will too! Don't let it eat at you.
You shouldn't be yelled at or disrespected by a spouse....certainly not "lectured". Why is he yelling at your son...I would have stopped that. I totally support helping your kids study and being there for them but he is old enough to make his flash cards. Have confidence in yourself as a wife and mom and demand respect from your husband. I'm sure your son will do fine on the test...if not, it's not the end of the world and it's not your fault.
Tell him to get over it. You are human and are intitled to make mistakes. No one is perfect. Did your son pass his test?? If so I wouldn't worry about it. Don't let him treat you like that. Atleast YOU didn't forget to pick up your child. And NO he shouldn't be upset over something like that. I think YOU should be upset at him for not picking up your child from school. THAT is just inexcusable! I would suggest that HE do the flash cards next time. Don't let this get to you. It is not worth it.
Hm... your son (10 yrs old) failed his test b/c you didn't do all of his flashcards. Actually, if the "yelling" were to happen, it should have been directed towards your son who is old enough to do his own work, study for his own tests and be honest about he has/has not completed.
You guys need to sit down and come up with some kind of organizational system as a family b/c it seems like you could all use some "get it together" lectures!
: P there are you cheered up ok so your not doing a dance now one two three four lets all hit the floor. :) shame on you for forgetting flash card the WORLD WILL END TOMARROW OH MY GOD. TELL HIM TO GET OVER HIMSELF. ;0
Bleck, your husband is a jerk.
Stand up for yourself and your son next time please.
He doesn't want to be in a firing squad in front of the Mamapedia Moms, that's for damn sure! Print this out and give it to him if you find it difficult to communicate with him.
Meanwhile, give yourself a break. Be good to YOU!
:)
Ok so I have been told this since day one of school. If YOU (the student) write is down it is more than likely going to stick in your head. So I think your son needs to start writing his own flash cards. You already learned this so you don't need to write it down.
I'm sorry your husband yelled, but he should not have yelled. I don't care if he doesn't yell at the kids a lot, there should never be yelling. There should be grown up talks to younger kids. Not treating them like dirt, which yelling is. Buck up and tell your husband that he needs to go to anger management. Probably should start yelling at him so that he can feel what it's like. I second the motion that your husband is a jerk. Stand up for yourself. If he hits you when YOU DO stand up for yourself, you should call the cops. Then I hope that would show some light into your situation. Sorry to get dark, but a man yelling for no reason usually will end up doing something like it.
Go get a mani/pedi. Relax have a good day. Make your son finish his homework, not you.
Breath in, Breath out really slow.
Do something good for yourself today.
It is not being selfish, this is a gift to your family.
Whenyou feel good and happy, you can take better care of them and you will feel stronger.
Your sons homework, is your SONS homework,. You can be there to help him find answers, you can be there to help him problem solve, but it is HIS education. He sounds very intelligent and capable, but he is still a boy and he is human. He will have some off days or weeks every once in a while. Let him face this so he will realize, "mom cannot rescue me for my own lack of hard work."
Your husband needs to take a step back. He owes you and your son an apology. A real big apology and a promise. A promise to quit yelling.
Yelling is not productive in ANY situation. Think about it, would he dare yell at one of his friends, coworker, minister, parents? Than why on earth would he yell at a child? People with this issue tend to be very insecure in their own abilities.
Your husband feels like a little man when he is not at home, so he comes home and "pisses on his family" to make him feel like a big man. Instead it makes him so obviously insecure.
Go to counseling, if he will not go with you, YOU go alone. You need to know YOU are not losing your mind.. You need to learn how to stand up for yourself and your children. Never let ANY one bully your child, even if the bully is the childs own father.
I am sending you a hug and some peace.
i'm sorry some people gave you some *yucky* answers...
It sounds like there are deeper issues going on and you should see a marage counsolor...*everyone* says "not us...we don't need that," or "it's not *that* bad." Please don't kump in that "fool-pool" too. :( If hubbie doesn't want to go the go yoursef. I don't know what u believe but Pray...It Works! U can even ask God to lift your spirits and give you joy...all you need to do is ask. There just might be a miricle in ur relationship from God and he is waiting for you to talk to him about it...you never know. But anyhow, if you are to afraid, shy, angry or whatever else to talk to God then I "get it" and I've been there *and* it is okay. Find a good book or movi or whatever it is you like to do that makes you happy and do it.
Journal. it gets thing off your chest. u don't have to do it evey day and don't beat yourself up if u don't write every day...but u should try to write/draw/scrappbook *something* most days (sometimes i put only 1 or 2 words..lol).
I do wish you the best. :)
Ummmm, yeah. I have to agree with the sentiment that it was your son's homework and therefore his responsibility to complete. He is old enough at the fifth grade level to be making his own flashcards. You can study with him, but he should be able to prepare his own study tools.
This is not your fault! Don't let your husband or your son hold you responsible for this. If your husband wanted it done on his terms, maybe he should quit yelling at you and do it himself. Sorry you have to deal with it, but this is so not your fault. Tell your husband to suck it! :P (not really, unless you really want to, but that was to help you feel better!)
