Constant Nightmares

Updated on April 07, 2010
M.A. asks from Fairfield, CT
4 answers

My 6 year old daughter, a normally heavy sleeper, has been having night terrors, waking dreams, whatever you want to call them. She has always had bad nightmares in spurts over the years, for a couple weeks at a time, but this episode seems especially cruel. They all happen in our house and either have to do with my husband or I getting killed by a wacko with a knife or the usual - an old witch who won't let her sleep and kills all of us. Over and over! And when these nightmare clusters happen over the years, they are always the same. She has told me than when she wakes up she can't tell the difference between the dream and reality and so comes bounding into our bed at 3:10am every morning. I do the usual and let her stay for five minutes (have to admit it is longer if I fall asleep) and then send her back to bed, no problem. Of course, we are then all tired in the morning.
She has resorted to playing a music cd before bed and reading until she passes out because she is scared to go to sleep. As far as I can tell there have been no real changes in her routine at school (other than she is bored) or at home nor does she watch any violent or scary TV or movies. Plus, being the resourceful child she is - she found a book about growing up geared towards girls that recommends talking to her doctor about it and perhaps going to a neurologist (or as she says - a brain doctor).
I will definitely talk to her pediatrician at her physical in May, but does anyone have any other thoughts? She is typically a well spoken, very active, creative and self sufficient child who tends to want to take care of everyone else.

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C.T.

answers from Denver on

Those do sound like scary dreams!! Perhaps do an internet search on vivid dreaming or repetitive dreams. No guarantee what kind of wacko stuff that may bring up so sort through discerningly.

If you have faith in God, pray with her. Teach her how to pray and tell God about all the things she is thankful for and all the ways that He is good.
God is more powerful than any dream.

Also, when you talk to her about the dream, reassure her that you have locks on all the doors and that your house is safe. That you and her dad arent going anywhere.

Also, ask her what she would change so that she can "win" the dream. Suggest that she treat it like a video game. It's her dream so she can do whatever she wants. Start making up some silly scenarios and get her laughing - like she captures the witch in a trap made out of her hoola hoop and the little forest animals tickle the witch and she laughs so hard that she turns "good" and runs off forever to play with the fairies. That will start to break the power that fear has over her.

2 moms found this helpful
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R.Y.

answers from New York on

I don't know if this will help but when I was a kid I sometimes worried something might happen to my parents. When I was probably 9 or 10 I realized I would probably just end up living with my grandparents and I never really worried the same way again. It might help her if you pointed out not only it is unlikely that anything will happen to you but that there are other people who love her and would take care of her in necessary.

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P.W.

answers from San Francisco on

I'm sure you already do this, but I when she wakes up with these things, I would just cuddle her and keep crooning, "nothing is going to happen to us, you're safe, nothing is going to happen to mommy and daddy, etc."

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A.P.

answers from New York on

How much sleep is she getting? Her age should still be getting 10-11 hours a night. My 5.5 year old functions best on 11.5-12 hours a night. Usually nightmares and night terrors are more active when children are short on sleep. Can you put her down 15-30 minutes earlier? Also, if she is waking at the same time every night you might try to break the sleep cycle and wake her before 3:10. Not much fun to set the alarm for a possible waking but maybe waking her and taking her to the bathroom before you go to bed would change the cycle. If it works the first night I would continue it for 3-5 days and see if her body has reset.

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