Closeing This Topic :)

Hey its ok to vent. And to tell you the truth I'd feel the same way. There is no reason why SOMEONE couldn't of called you.

I DO understand how you're feeling, and would equally feel pretty bad if that happened with me, but try to hold that hurt feeling back as much as possible especially from your friend who's currently in over her head with new baby stuff. Try to channel those feelings into well wishing and can't wait to meet the new little addition types of comments. Just express how much you love her now and let the time-delay in finding out go. Her guy is probably multi-tasking a lot right now, and that's hard for guys. Hang in there. Feel hurt, but don't dwell on it anymore, just focus on the positive way you feel toward her. You're hurt because you love her so much.

Don't jump to any conclusions. Maybe it is her man's fault, not hers. Maybe she assumed her man called you, and she's wondering why YOU didn't call HER. I don't blame you for being upset, but get the whole story before you say something to her you'll regret later.

Dont' feel bad for being offended, it was more your feelings were hurt. When you are that close to someone of course you want to know something that big right when it happens. I just remember having complications with my pregnancy and everything went a lot faster, then I had to have a csection and wasn't feeling like talking to anyone afterwards.
I did have a group email thing set up so my husband (ex now) could send out a group email, but he didn't even do that as he forgot and was exhausted when he got home. So everyone found out the next day, one of my good friends was the one that made a lot of the calls for me.
You do realize what it is like having a baby and having to let the world know, you are right to have your feelings hurt and I am glad you cooled off. Don't take it personally, just remind yourself what it was like, go visit her in the hospital or at home and bring a little present for her and the baby! HUGS!

I'm glad you are feeling better!! It can be so hard to not be offended. I really do get offended at every little thing and my husband tells me I shouldn't, but it's just not that easy. I wanted to tell you a little bit about my side of the story and hopefully it helps you a little (maybe it won't, but I'll try).
I had my first baby 5 months ago and I live across the country from my family and best friend. Well, we had the baby and a few hours went by before I got a chance to call my mother and she was offended that I didn't call her right away. But I just had the baby, the nurses were checking me over, I bonded with and breastfed my baby, took a shower, was transferred to another unit, etc. It also took me 2 days to call my best friend. As much as I love her, I just was in a world of my own and completely sleep deprivated. I had been contracting for days and didn't get sleep and had a long, hard labor. The baby was up all night and then during the day Drs, nurses, the lactation consultant were coming in every minute and I was trying to catch naps and enjoy my baby, so I felt HORRIBLE and silly when I finally did call her and say "I had my baby.....2 days ago." But things were just so hectic and crazy. I hope she wasn't offended, she didn't say that she was, but I did feel bad. I hope you feel better soon!! And your friend still loves you dearly!!

Sweet S.,
May I suggest you "put down your beat-up stick" and not be so hard on yourself first of all! It sounds like you are a wonderful wife, mother, friend and woman of light! You're a gift to all who know you! Is it a possibility that because you and your friend are so very close and connected her mom, man and mutual friends assumed you already knew; that your friend would call you herself? Is it a possibility that she fully intended to and reserved that exciting announcement for herself because she loves you so much...you're the one person she wanted to tell? And...unfortunately, the "hurry and skurry" of having a new little one overwhelmed her and she didn't get that phone call made YET? I would dare bet she's so looking forward to your visit and can't wait for you to wrap your arms around her and her new little one! When everyone else goes home and it's just her and her new baby she'll be waiting for you!

Just a thought (I don't know her mom, of course) but, perhaps she's "taking charge right now" and doesn't even realize she offended or "left you out". Consider calling your friend and letting her know you are thrilled for her! Reassure her that you will be there when she comes home to assist her and share in the joy of her new baby! Let her know she can count on you!

As far as feeling down prior to and during this...is it a possibility you have some feelings of "losing your best friend" now to motherhood? Is it a possibility even your unconscious mind (ego mind) is tricking you into believing somehow she'll love you and your two little ones less because she has her own baby? It's been my experience she'll love you more (because love multiplies the more we share it) and she'll be grateful to have you and your experience to assist her! Your children will be great examples (siblings) to her young child and it will only enhance your relationship. Trust your friendship! Trust yourself and don't waste any more time feeling depressed or "replaced"! I can tell you are a loving, caring, beautiful woman! Take good care of yourself...do something nice for you at least once every day...especially right now!

All My Love,
C. F.

When I had my first baby, I was so tired and stressed that I only called my family and my husband called his. We didn't call any friends, not even my best friend, until after we were home. It wasn't because we didn't want to share the news, but after a long labor and delivery, lack of sleep, breastfeeding problems, and family visitors, time just got away from us and we just couldn't deal with any more phone calls or visitors. Just keep in mind that this is a big change for them and that they probably have "baby" on the brain 24/7. I'm sure they didn't mean to offend you or anyone else.

I understand how you feel being out of the loop. It still feels like we're in Jr. High when people forget to tell us things we feel are important! I bet your friend was just so wrapped up in all that comes with a new baby she really couldn't call. I still remember having a hard time even talking to someone on the phone for months after the birth of my first son. So, don't feel too bad about it! I'm sure you'll be getting a big call her soon.

It's understandable that you are hurt. But this is about her and her baby and the father --- and not about you. Handle it the way you would want her to handle it if the shoe were on the other foot.