W.S.
It's normal to have these feelings. Don't be hard on yourself. I can't imagine the second pregnancy being the same as the first. The first time you are pregnant everything is new and exciting. I had the same feelings with my second pregnancy. it was not planned, in fact we had just decided that we were done and our daughter was the only child we needed ( I did want another, but financially it would put a burden on us). When I found out I was pregnant I was already three months pregnant. I didn't even want to tell my husband. I was not thrilled with the idea and too felt like a bad mommy. How could I not be happy?
My daughter will be three in April and my little man is 7 months, they are a little over two years apart, and now I wish we had them a little closer. Amanda was very used to being the only child. Not that she isn't a loving big sister, she is the one who can make him laugh the loudest and she loves to entertain, but the sharing thing is a little hard. So, it might be a blessing in disguise that you are having them close together!! Godd luck and don't worry, you have the right to be feeling the way you are!!!!
One more thing. I didn't stop having those feelings after the baby was born either. My last month I was in and out of the hospital and he was delivered three weeks early. Don't get me wrong, I loved my son, but the whole thing was too emotional. The first time I spent the night at the hospital they almost had to restrain me, after all, who was going to kiss my little girl goodnight (as I sit here crying remembering that day). And when I got home from the hospital with this new baby, I was overwhelmed. It took a good three to four months to get back into a grove. So don't beat yourself up even after the baby is born, it takes time. I wouldn't change anything now. he is my lovey and has the best smile ever. I love when I open his door in the morning and he gives me that bigh huge smile of his and I think every time, i would do it over angain.
Good luck, and if it you think it would help, talk to your dr. And congratulations!!!!!