Children Left in Cars

I keep the non-emergency number to the police handy (programmed into my cel phone) for situations like this - not really an emergency, but cause for concern, especially with the recent heat.

YES! Call. The. Police. Definitely! No matter what the weather, this is child endangerment and neglect! What IF a creep comes along next time and you are not there!?! Heaven forbid! Some people just DO NOT THINK!! Maybe if the irresponsible parent gets a ticket, a warning, SOMETHING, then they will somehow GET the gravity of the situation! This is unacceptable!! I would not think twice about calling the police. You hear too often about how someone leaves a child in a car and the child dies. Or gets kidnapped. Or .....well, I don't want to think about it. Gruesome. Horrifying. And the worse thing - COMPLETELY AVOIDABLE!!

I would call the police. Especially now in the summer when it is so hot. Kids have died while being left in hot cars. This is a case of neglect and child endangerment.

I know you've gotten alot of responses, but I have to agree with the ones that said it depends on the ages. There's been many times when my children didn't want to go in someplace with me & I have left them in the car. I have often wondered when somebody was going to call the cops on me even though they were old enough by my idea. Obviously, they sit with locked doors. You don't want to live to regret something in life, but if you live paranoid (of crazies) you aren't really living so you have to make the best judgments you can as a parent (including leaving your kids in the car or not) Anyways, if the oldest child in the car is not at least of school age I would be concerned if it was at a store (WalMart, etc - there's no short trips there), if it's at a gas station, post office, bank I would still be concerned, but patient. When it comes down to it, they're not your kids & if the kids aren't in immediate physical danger (heat, crying, you know they've been there for too long, etc, or obviously is an infant / toddler) then it's not your business what that parent does with their child. Everybody parents differently & if the child is not being abused or in immediate danger, it's not your concern. I'm sure there are plenty of people who will disagree, but it really comes down to a judgement call & you have to make sure you base it on a facts / the law & not personal beliefs.

Hi K.,

I wonder how many kids have died because we're all too afraid to offend the parents or mind someone else's business?

In my opinion, it boils down to this, if it's so fast you barely notice it - that's not such a big deal. If you notice the kids and wait and still don't see parents, it's starting to be a big deal. Those parents would never forgive themselves if their children died - and you would never forgive yourself for not intervening.

In this temperature, it's very dangerous to be in the car without the air on.

I have been at a gas station where I could see my daughter in her booster the whole time and ran in to pay, but God and everyone knew my eyes were on my car and it was fast. That's about as fast as I would risk it.

I use the BuckleBuddy hotline about kids not being properly restrained, either not in boosters when they should be, not in seat belts or not in the backseat.

I think in some ways it does take a village to raise children. And too bad for some kids, even the village idiots can reproduce :-) - so trying to educate parents is part of being a good community, good citizen. Sometimes people sincerley do not realize the potential for danger for their children.

Sorry to everyone if I sound too harsh, but I'd rather have parents pissed off at me than the memory of a child who I didn't help and later died. I think the world too often 'mind's it's own business' with regard to children and their safety - but they can't stick up for themselves, they depend on us to notice.

A child died in my community after being left home alone for a short period of time. (It was a freak accident). The thing that still sticks with me the most is the neighbor being quoted as saying, "the mom left him alone a lot." I want to scream at that neighbor - "did it ever occur to you to offer to watch the child?" Personally, I would have offered or called the police, not just done nothing.

Best of luck to you - and I hope we all ponder this question and make the right decisions at the right time.

Good Morning K., God bless you for your diligence.
It's a hard subject to know the best thing to do. In the summer months it is so dangerous to leave children unattended in hot cars.
In one area it would depend on the age of the children.
I will leave our 10 yr old gr daughter in the car with our two youngest gr son's if I am running into our little Gas station grocery store here in town, for milk or bread. Less then 3 to 5 minutes tops. I have ran into the post office, and the bank to put a payment in the slot in the foyer, leaving the 2 boys. I can see them through the window and they can always see me. I have asked one of the reg. coffee club members to watch my car for me for a minute. My gr son's I watch daily are 4yrs & 20 months.

Then you read a story out of Houston( used to live in Tx so I read Chronicle daily) where a mom stepped out of her car to put air in her tire and almost gets carjacked with her
three children in the car. The air hose is right there and the guy shoves her to the ground. He is stopped and believe it or not she is charged with Child endangerment. Cause she didn't take out her keys or her 3 children out of the car to put air in her tire. 8 yr old, 5 yr old and 4 month old. What sane person would? 2 children big enough to run through a gas station parking lot and one an infant in a carrier!!

If you are standing there waiting for more then 10 minutes and these are really small children,I would definitely say something to whom ever came back to the car. Not to scold or put down, but something like I saw the kids here and wanted to make sure no one bothered them and they were ok.
Sometimes you just can't trust them to stay put. I have done this before, it turned out well no one felt threatened or shammed. They said thank you so much, the line was longer then I thought it would be or something. If it's 15-20 minutes I would call 911.

I would not leave my gr son's unattended for more then 2-3 minutes out of my sight. If I step inside the gas/grocery store and see a line I go back and get them. We have population of less then 1000 here. I would never leave a child in a car in a big parking lot, like Wal-mart or a Big Grocery store. Not even my 10 yr old grand daughter.

My advice K., is use your best Mama's instinct on each situation you find yourself in. You could save a precious child's life.

God Bless you
K. Nana of 5
PS I know I will be poo-pooed for leaving the boys for a minute or 2 to run in drop off mail, live here though...lol Our whole town is a school zone...lol 20 mph everywhere. Everyone waves and tips their hats..lol Small town living at it's best.

I work in a local grocery store and I cannot even begin to tell you how many time I have seen children left alone in the car while Mom or Dad "run in for just a minute". I think I would have to decide on a case by case basis what I was going to do about the situation. I can tell you that one time I DID do something and it resulted in the Mother being charged with child endangerment. It was a really extreme case and I have never regretted getting involved. There were 3 young children...toddler and below in age...left in a car with the engine still running...doors locked and the children had gotten out of their car seats and were climbing back and forth over the seat. I just happened to see a Sheriff in uniform in the parking lot...he used his car to block the car in so it wouldnt roll or be moved before more officers arrived. We waited over 20 minutes before the Mother finally came out!!
I think that I would just handle it on a case by case basis...what are the ages of the children...what is the area like that you are in...just use your own best judgement. But I applaud you for your concern!!
R. Ann

I understand your concern but you need to know the situation before involving the police and make a potential problem out of nothing. I have a 7 yr old and 4 yr old twins. I rarely leave my children in the car alone but there have been occasions when it is necessary usually when I am dropping off or picking up my oldest at the school. When it's pouring down rain and I have to check my kid out I will leave them in a locked car rather than try to take both of the kids out of the car and turn a thirty second issue into 10 mintue situation and soaked bad tempered children.
Unfortunately there are some parents who leave their children unattended for extended amounts of time and it makes it more difficult for the parents who are just trying to stay on time for everything.
Until someone walks in my shoes and knows my situation I would hope that they would confront me first and not call the police on an innocent situation.
I know some people won't agree with me but I'm sure there are areas of their parenting I would not agree with. I don't believe for a minute that I am neglecting, endangering or abusing my children by leaving them for a minute when it is necessary.

Hi K.! I DO NOT leave my kids unattended in the car, it is very inconvenient to drag all 5 out of the car and into the place even if it is for a few minutes. I have let my oldest run into the gas station that we go to all the time and know all the employees, that has one exit and is completely glass front to go inside while I open all the windows and stand right outside the car and watch both, that has been one time and only because we needed milk and two kiddos were sleeping. About the air thing, thats ridiculous that is the same as pumping gas in your car you wouldn't get the kids out, I wonder how she would have been charged if she let he kids out of the car and one of them got hit in the parking lot?? What about the lady who repeatedly hit her kid in the parkinglot or the lady who used the carwash sprayer to spray her kid in the face? They got parenting classes and no charges. Nice.

My opinion, is that it would depend on the ages of the child/children. It could be that the oldest is "old enough" to sit with doors locked and lay on the horn for help if Mom got out to just run in somewhere quick, like paying the bill at the gas station or it could be at Little Ceasar's Pizza where the Mom is able to watch her vehicle through the windows the entire time she ran in. Obviously, if the mom is nowhere in sight and she's gone for a long time than I'd stay by the vehicle and consider calling the police too. Watching over small children should be everyone's concern but not all people feel that way and some parents may not appreciate if you tell them your two cents. But, on the other hand, if you're willing to get into a confrontation over it than feel free to speak up. Some Moms/dads will defend and justify their actions and others may appreciate your concern, but not likely. And, I don't judge "all" parents to be neglectful but rather some who just make dumb, not so common-sense smart decisions but still love and care about their babies.

I ran across this problem at the pet store about 6 months ago and it was the Dad who left a bundled newborn in her carseat in the back of the car with the windows rolled up. I did speak up and he did "BITE MY HEAD OFF" and told me that "I should worry with my OWN children and he'd take care of his OWN". And, when I talked to an employee who worked there about calling the police...well, by that time, he was gone. I still called the police anyway to see if there was anything they would/could do and they told me that especially if he's already left than there ISN'T anything they could do so they would not bother even sending a squad car. If I had it to do differently than I would've just called the police FIRST and then possibly confronted the dad or just let the police show up to handle it. But, having someone speed away so they don't get in trouble with the law isn't a safe situation for a child in a car either.

This is a touchy subject because I'd never think twice that it was 'okay' to stand by and watch a child suffer from being left in a car but...sometimes when we get involved in other people's business than it doesn't do any good because they get defensive and basically tell us to #(!*(&@^%. You'll just have to use your discretion and if you're truly worried than stick around until the parent gets back and watch the clock to see how long they were gone. If the child is truly in danger from the heat or being car-jacked than call the police but if the parent has just run in and runs out than I'd keep an eye on the child and keep my opinions to myself.

The fact is, if they are the kind of person who thinks it's okay to do this in the first place than chances are they are not going to stop this behaviour just because you share your opinion or worry with them. One of the prayers I say is a blanket prayer for "all" children for God to keep them safe because unfortunately, there are lots of neglected, mistreated kids out in the world. So...just be cautious and helpful when you can be. Maybe you're that childs angel for the moment to make sure that no harm comes to them...but then their reality steps back in to play the minute the parent does return to the car. We don't always know everyone elses life situation so sometimes if we judge incorrectly and get involved, than we just end up making trouble for someone else and ourselves. My personal bottom line is that after watching for several minutes and if there isn't a parent in sight and the child is crying, hurt or in danger from a "bad" stranger than I'll get involved but if all the previous is not the case...than I mind my own business and keep my judgements to myself and just feel good that I could help keep an eye out for a few minutes. Take care...I'm glad to learn that there are others still out there like you who have a genuine heart!

I did some googling. Only 14 states have enacted laws about leaving children alone in cars. The laws are very different among these 14 with the average state saying that only children under the age of 7 are protected by legislation.

In Missouri it's children 10 and under. BUT, Missouri laws only take effect if someone dies or if the child causes or is involved in an accident. I find it odd that the legislation really is very weak. But it's non-existent in most states.

Some of the 14 states require that the parent be gone longer than 10 minutes for it to be a crime.

I am also surprised that the heat is not addressed specifically. Children that die usually die from heat related deaths. But they do lump the backing up over children in with leaving kids alone in cars. I find these laws confusing when so many parents allow their children to play outside without them. I find that to be a much more HUGE crime. I don't think any child should be outside, left to their own devices and available for some creep to snatch them. But it happens every day in so many homes, everywhere. I see the kids in the yards, on the streets etc. I didn't allow my kids out of my site even for a minute until they were much older. Even now my 8 year old is allowed to take the dog to the bathroom only by the front door and only when I am watching. Otherwise, she doesn't go anyplace without me, not even the yard, front or back.

Suzi

It would depend on the ages of the children. I usually requested being left in the car as a kid so I could sit and read my book. (I still do that as an adult if my husband wants to go to the Home Depot.) If it was an infant or very small child, I would call the police, but otherwise I think it's ok for short periods of time. There arent as many crazies out there waiting to take your kids out of the car as you think. I would recommend http://freerangekids.wordpress.com/ the lady who runs it has great statistics from the Department of Justice about crime rates being down and not having to worry so much about leaving your kids unattended. I'm not saying she, or I, think leaving small kids alone in the car is great, but if they're 7 or older, I wouldnt worry.

I had this happen to me when it was really hot outside. I pulled into a parking stall and noticed two small children, approximately 3 yrs and 6 months alone in a car. The baby was crying and the 3 year old was yelling at the baby to be quiet. I watched for a few minutes, then saw a security guard at the door of the grocery store. I walked over to him and explained the situation (I could still see the kids the whole time). He thanked me...I watched the rest from inside the store. The police arrived before the mother came out. Very sad. I didn't want the mother to see me or my car, so I waited inside till it was all over.

I too wait for the parent to come out before I leave. I havent seen it a lot, or maybe lately I have been too busy to notice! I have only noticed it at gas stations though. If I saw it at a store where the children were unattended for awhile I would no doubt call the police. I think some moms think its ok to just run in the gas station, pay and run out. I personally wouldnt do it, but some do. I either pay at the pump, drag the kids inside, or wait until I dont have the kids to go. I would say just keep doing what you are doing. Chances are if shes just running in, calling the police will do no good considering they will probably be gone when they get there. Some people do not consider this to be a bad thing. Some people are just wired differently. To me, there is no excuse for this, but Im sure people will come up with one. I wish I could change all the bad things I see, but I cant, so I just make sure the kids are ok before I leave.

I would say if you are waiting by the car and it is longer than five minutes, call the cops. Children die from being left in a car or get car jacked. If they come out before then, then by all means, say something! I would. Say it nicely and rehearse it before hand, sounds strange, but it helps. You never know. Good luck and God Bless...and bless you for waiting by the car to make sure the kiddos are okay.

As some of the mama's have said keep the police phone number in your cell phone. I don't care how long the children have been alone (unless you see that the parent was putting the cart in the cart corral & comming back)children should never be left unattended. Now the KS law says younger children can be left in a car if there is an older child (10 y/o +) with them (for a short time such as paying for gas).
If I see a child in a car I wait for a few moments to see if an adult is comming from the cart corral. If not I make sure that there is not an adult (or teen) in the car then I call the police. I would not speak to the parent as they know what they have done. My mom waited by a car at Walgreens that had a sleeping infant in it & confronted the mother that the baby could get too hot & die. The mother said (in a snotty voice) 'I was just running in for a minute'. My mom was there for about 10 min. waiting & if it were much hotter that baby may not have been alive today.
I would rather risk embarassment (that there was a teen or adult that I didn't see) than worry that the child in the car may die.

God bless!

I wouldn't say anything to the parent because our concern may not settle good with them and they may lash out.But if it were an infant toddler a child who is yonger than a pteteen then yes I would call the police and tell them the situation and how many minutes you have been by the vehicle to watch them.And especially if the windows are rolled up it takes minutes for an infat to die in such hot weather the heat rises so fast in an enclosed car.(You may even have saved a life)Because I remember last year so many children had died because the parent or caregiver forgot to drop them off to where they needed to go and left them in the car.Be your own judgement.

well if it is hot out and they are not old enough to know how to turn the car on I would get a little concerned. if it is at a gas station i wouldn't be so worried since that usually doesn't take to long. It also depends on if the windows are down. If it is older kids then obviously they can handle being alone for a little bit. But if it is toddlers and infants then yeah I would get concerned. Personally I would confront the parents but i'm just that type of person. My daughter is 16 months I never leave her in the car even to go pay for gas just because she would scream and my car's ac doesn't work all that great. But i'd say around 10 yrs old most kids are mature enough to be alone for a little bit. also like my aunt she lets her kids stay in the car one is 11 and the other is 12 they both know how to turn the vehicle on and always have water bottles with them. so it just depends on the situation.

Last time I was in this situation I was in the walmart parking lot and I saw an infant in a carseat with the windows up/car was running and also maybe a 2 year old or 3 year old in a carseat as well, it may have had the AC on but it was also hotter than Hades outside...as soon as I got in the door I told the greeter and gave the aisle the car was in and the license plate number and they called the police to report it, I would have but I am one of the last dinosaurs who lives sans cell phone. I know parents may try and rationalize that it will be "easier" to run in and get one thing rather than drag small children in but it is against the law. It is against the law for a Reason, it is dangerous. Now I myself will leave my kids in the car if I have to run inside and pay for gas, but only at my local gas station where I KNOW for a fact that I can run in put my $20 on the counter and tell the cashier the pump #...and only when one of my older kids is with me, I would never do that if it was just Alex with me ( my 2 yr old) nor would i do that at a different gas station where I might be standing in line and unable to keep my car in sight.

Oh...and I feel as passionate about people leaving animals in cars too...it just gets too hot...

Have a great day
B.

K., I've only ever come across this once and it was years ago. Call the Cops!!!

Thanks for being the wonderful citizen who can't just walk away with kids possibly at risk!

M.

My kids are older now, but going into the gas station or for bread and milk I did leave them in the car. If it was too hot - I had two keys for my car so I left it running and locked. You definitely can get in trouble for it.

Unfortunately the babies that die in cars are usually forgotten. :( It's too sad...

But for the Grace of God go I...

I would not stand by the car, that could cause them to get angry. It would depend on the situation. where they are, what is the temperature outside, sometimes unfortunatly it is easier with older children to just leave them in the car. Are they leaving small under 5 years olds in the car, are the keys in it. I don't think that there is much you can do about it. I have a 6 year old and sometimes I will leave her in just to run in to pay for gas. I always lock the doors and she stays in her booster seat. If it is hot or cold outside I will leave the van running because I have remote start and it does not need keys. i would not involve the police unless it it very small children, they have been in there for a long time.

Call the police :) I always do, and the police and children are ALWAYS happy... ALSO, you never know how long the children have been in the car before you arrived. On hot days, they should not be left in the car, EVER... better to call!! Plus, maybe the parent will get embarrassed and learn their lesson :)

I would call the police. It wouldn't matter to me whether it was hot or not. I would never leave my children unattended, even if I just ran in for a second and could watch them the entire time from the store window. NEVER. It just takes seconds for something horrible to happen. I wouldn't worry about the confrontation with the adult either - the kids come first, and unfortunately, sometimes it's up to outsiders to speak up for them.

Good for you for standing there and waiting for the parents to show up!

I def agree with calling the police. You dont know the situation,but I say if a child is left unattended its not the best situation!! Ive heard of too many deaths b/c of this and I think it should be left in the police hands not yours.

I used to that as well but it is scary out there now. If the parents see you waiting by their car they are liable to hurt you. Keep the local police phone number on your cell phone and call the station. Then stay nearby, but not to close until the police arrive. They may want to keep you on the phone until they arrive.

This is important because in the summer children can die in a too hot car -- it doesn't have to be that hot. In the winter if you live in MO or KS, or many other places they could freeze to death. Then there are the creeps out there that could take them easily.

I would get the license plate # then call the police. We've all read about the 10 year old dragged to his death here in KC, his mother had gone in for a drink and had seen the car jacker, so she came out and tried to get the boy out of the car, he was dragged by his seat belt, I can't ever get that out of my mind!! My son was just a couple of years older, he's almost 17 now and I still have him lock the car doors if he's in the car by himself! Don't ever regret trying to do something good, I have seen a police officer confront someone at a 7-11, so legally they should do something. As for the mother putting air in her tires, her big mistake was leaving her keys in the car.

When I come across this situation I call the police and wait near by until they get there. So you make a parent unhappy atleast their child is safe.

As you know, there is a growing epidemicof children being left in unattended vehicles. Since 1998, approximately a child a week has perished. This is a circumstance that is preventable. We at Bee-Alert Safety Products (bee-alert.com) have developed an auto alarm that verbally instructs the driver to check the rear car seat for a small passenger. This is a simple device that is inexpensive and easy to install. We are asking individuals, such as yourself, to help us spread the word. We can't do it by our selves, and time is fleeting. Another lost baby is one more tragedy that becomes just another statistic. Thanking you in advance for you concern and help . Sincerely, R. Zachar. ____@____.com

I can't believe you come across this. First don't put yourself in danger. Go back into/call the store and let a manager know there are children in a car. Give them their car model and license plate #. With summer here is get to hot for kids to be in a car especially alone and windows down. Also let them ask them if you should call the police instead, I'm sure they will take care of it for you.
That to me is a sign the parents don't want to bother with the trouble of taking them in, well they should of had kids.
Hope this helps.
Steph

Call the police!! Children can die and too many parents take it for granted. I will always call the police if I see this situation. I will not stand directly next to the vehicle so that I don't put myself in direct danger but I am still close enough to keep an eye on things in case of any emergency like another window needs to be broken or something.

i wold callthe cops

I would call the police. Its too hot to leave children in a car.. also like you said there could be creepy people out there. I dont understand why people insisit on leaving their children in the car alone.. if there is a adult in the car too and it is running sure i would have no problem with it..

Some people need to learn its not the right thing to do!

I would call the police, no hesitation or questions. My brother is a cop and gets these calls often so it is not a btoher to them

I think it would depend on how old the oldest "child" in the car is? Be sure, though. My youngest daughter is almost 16 and she looks younger....In extreme weather, is the car running, are the doors locked??? It would depend on the situation as far as what to do...stand by, or call the police.

Hope this helps
Take care and God Bless :)
T.