Children Exploring Their Bodies?

Personally, I do not think this is a problem. It is normal. I have a son and a doughter and I expected it to be more common with my son, but like you, I have really had the issue more with my daughter. As long as you have asked all the "questions" and she knows that it is her body, I do not think it is a issue. I would be sure she understnads it is something that is private and stop focusing on it. We live in a very sexual society. Kids see these images even when we are trying to protect them. They are everywhere! I hope I am not to blunt. I think you have done everything the right way. Hang in there!

Speaking from experience, please watch her closely in the years to come...when she gets in Junior High and High School there is a chance that she will want someone else to give her the pleasure she is giving herself now. She may become VERY sexually active. Trust me, I speak from experience...it "feels good" when she does it to herself and will feel even better when someone else does it to her with her permission. It is natural to explore at any age and it can feel good, and as she gets older will most likely feel better. When she is old enough, give her "the talk" hopefully that will help and prevent anything you don't want to happen from happening.

I also have to disagree with Wendy, I found that I could pleasure myself, of all things so cliche, but from climbing the rope in gym class, really. I'm not a good example though because I was molested as a child by two different people, although I got no pleasure from those experiences. I did want to say, that I was molested at a young age, starting as young as I can remember, probably about three or so, and my mother was completely unaware, and was also very proactive about talking to us about good touches and bad touches, and I didn't say anything about it to her. It's such a scary topic, but a very important one, we need to ask specific questions, not just did they make you feel uncomfortable, because I didn't know what this meant when I was younger. Just a thought I wanted to put out there.

A.,

Just a quick note to let you know that I agree with all of the other responses so far except for Wendy. I DO NOT believe that children had to have been molested to learn that they feel pleasure in different parts of the their body. As a young girl, I discovered this area because I would wait too long to go to the bathroom. So, as I would pull at my pants to keep from peeing, I discovered a "ticklish" area that I didn't know was there before. My parents never made it a big deal, and I think I am a halfway normal adult. So, as in every "pleasure seeking" behavior, we as parents have to guide our children as to what is appropriate, etc.

D.

My girl is just 19 months, but I have been watching for signs of her wanting to explore herself more. The brochure I got at her 18 month well child check said that masturbation in this age of children was normal. I think kids/people just figure out what feels good and do it. I know that when I was a child, I figured out how to make myself feel good, but never had terminology for it until my cousin was explaining what a teacher had told them in sex ed class. My parent's strict views would have never allowed them to share with me about what I was experiencing. So, just make sure a child knows that it is something to be done in private, and that it is something that we are given to help ourselves feel good when we are by ouselves.

My three year old daughter has been masturbating since she was 18 months. I've asked the same questions, and am quite sure she's never been harmed. It's very normal, from everything I've read. I have encourage her to only do this in private, as it is a VERY private matter. Please, don't make her feel as if she is doing something wrong, it truly is natural. Good luck!

I did with my daughter. What we need to know as parents is that this stuff is perfectly natural. We don't want to make our children feel like outcasts because they touch themselves. As my daughter got a little older I would talk to her about privacy and appropriate times and places. I was molested as a child so I had the sexual desire, but felt guilty and dirty about it and that is not how we want our children to feel when they are doing what is natural and normal. So I guess my advise is as long as she is not doing things to other kids, or doing it at imappropriate times or places, then just let nature run its course. It will eventually stop. Trust me if it didn't then we would have a bunch of adults running around masterbating all the time. The one thing I did talk to my daughter about was that the womans vagina was very delicate and talked about potential infections and about keeping herself clean. Not touching herself with dirty hands. And most importantly not putting objects inside. But even those topics are age appropriate. We don't want to give the child new ideas.

You have no idea how relieved I am to hear form someone who's daughter is doing this. Problem in the beginning was she would do it anywhere. From anything I have heard form doctors or psychologists, it is normal. Is your daughter hypersensitive? My daughter is hypersensitive to everything---noise, bright light, and especially anything on her skin. I have to be careful about what she wears to school, or she will play with unusually textured shirts instead of focusing on her work. From that perspective, it makes sense she likes masturbation---hadn't thought about it before.

Just keep solid boundaries about when and where it is acceptable. Make sure she understands that it is private rather than "dirty." And keep open the dialogue about no one else is allowed to touch her that way.

I also agree with everyone except Wendy! It's definitely not abnormal - it's just that some people discover these areas at a young age, and some don't. I would suggest you just make sure she knows that masturbating is something that is private and not to be done anywhere but in private and that no one else but a doctor should touch her down there - until she's MUCH older, that is, but that's something that she doesn't need to know until she IS much older.

my daughter liked touching herself there as early as around 14 mos old, and she was doing it the other day on the toilet. I am very supportive but say we do that in private in our bedroom so she does not get in trouble at day care. I agree it could be a sign someone is abusing her but if she says no one has touched her in her private parts (I mean other than her parents maybe when she was a baby or a doctor during an exam) it's probably just her nature. my personal opinion. hope that helps. (oddly my son isn't doing this but he is just 2.5 yrs old)