Child Support - Grand Rapids,MI

Contact a lawyer. It doesn't matter if you are married or not - if he is the father and he is on the birth certificate (or found through dna, etc) then you are entitled to child support. Some people don't want the father on the BC since it gives them legal rights (in addition to legally enforceable child support).

Here is a good web site re: michigan child support
http://www.michigan.gov/dhs/0,1607,7-###-###-####_5528-10...

and here is an excerpt from the site:
Establishing paternity by including the father on the birth certificate gives a child born outside of marriage the same legal rights as a child born to married parents.

I would talk with a social worker to find out what is reasonable. They are a 3rd party and know what is legally allowed etc...

Wow, he buys diapers and food for the baby at his house? big deal! he needs to be paying you money. It's atleast 17% of his income. who cares if he can't move out? he needs to grow up and deal with it. maybe even cut his own living expenses. the baby comes first, and since you can't work full time, then he needs to give. DON'T let him convince you otherwise!!!!! if it were you and he was seeking child support, he wouldn't stop (that's how men are lol).

child support doesn't just have to go towards diapers, food, etc! the child needs a place to live, so using child support toward rent is not taking advantage... and it's like you said, your well being is his well being! also- even if you were never married he is still the father of your child, and he lives outside the home. You need to take this to court... they usually base child support on the income of the parent paying... Im sure you will be able to find a fair solution.

~my dad pays child support for my youngest brother, even though he lives with him 4-5 days of the week, he buys him most of his clothes/toys, and provides everything for his care while he is at his house. My dad is by no means well-off, so there is never much left over. Your boyfriend's money problems are not your issue, and you do have the right to child support as the primary caregiver.

This is something you two will never, ever agree on. The only way to do figure it out is with lawyers. It's not to say you both have to make this out to be a bad thing, it's going to always be a bad thing because you're going to do nothing but argue about it and that's not good for the child.

Get a lawyer

Having experienced this with an ex-boyfriend and the mother of his child...go to court and get custody & support settled now, especially right now that you're together and talking well. He's going to 'convince' you in whatever way he can as to get out of it. Though he may feel he is justifying it he is really just manipulating you. His financial situation is not you're problem. He needs to give what is fair to help support his son and that includes you putting a roof over his head!

Google the Legal Aid Society in your county, they will help you get started with the process of legalizing a custody/support agreement,for the benefit of your baby, this should be done anyway, it's a means of protection...ask more questions here when you hit a bump in that road...these moms know EVERYTHING! Good Luck to you!

K.,

You should file paperwork to have child support reviewed. You each will submit your wages and let the cout decide how much (if anything) either of you should pay (it doesn't matter what your expenses are). In Kent County, they go by the number of overnights the child is with each parent along with the wages. Good Luck!

C.

Heres the most simple answer....He needs to pay you child support!! If your son lives with you and you have primary custody, he needs to pay it and you need to use it for the care of you son! Him moving out of his Mothers house is not your problem and certainly not your childs problem.

In order to do what is right for your son, I would suggest going through the court and enforcing child support legally. This is the only way to ensure that your son is getting what HE deserves from HIS father, not what either of you think is fair.

He is still responsible for his child no matter what extras he pays for to help out. I have been through this with an ex. Friend of the Court will tell him the amount of bills he has is his problem, he should have thought about that before having a kid. They will use his income and some of his expenses to determine what he is to pay. Don't let him push you around on this.

Ok if he is the father of your baby and you are living seperately he is still legally responsible for paying you child support. When you go thru the friend of the court system they take into account how much time is spent with each parent, so if he has him often then he will pay less. But you do have a right to child support!!!!!!!

When you find yourself being convinced by him that he shouldn't have to pay child support, remind yourself of this fact: he does not take care of the child exactly 50% of the time (or at least it didn't seem like that from your post). If that were the case, then I could understand his argument that he shouldn't have to pay anything. It's great that he takes care of all the expenses while the baby is with him. But unless he takes care of the baby exactly 50% of the time (including sleep time), then he needs to pay you child support to help fund the shelter over your child's head, clothes on his back and food in his belly (amongst the many other expenses!)

GO TO FRIEND OF THE COURT NOW... Don't let him convince you of that bullcrap! If you guys had 50/50 time (like baby with you one week, him the next, etc) and making same amount of money, then ya....maybe he'd have a point... But that doesn't seem to be the case. So what if he buys what the baby needs when he is there....big flippin deal! You & your child deserve child support asap! Matter of fact, make sure its back dated to whenever you guys split up! Do it quick, please! Do not let him sweet talk you or talk his way out of it (which is what he's doing now)... There is a lot more expenses involved in raising a child than he is making it out to be! One INCLUDES a roof over his head while he sleeps! Good Luck!

He needs pay child support. It's not "mommy" money. It's money for you to help support your child. Most men have problems paying child support. It's not just him. If it didn't get taken directly out of my ex's check I wouldn't get it.

Child support is to support the child. The person who has primary custody of the child is entitled to financial support from the other parent.

We have guardianship of several of my grandchildren and we receive child support from two different fathers and zero from my daughter. The money they pay provides shelter and comfort for these children. It provides food, warmth, cooling, sheets, blankets, shoes, clothes, diapers, pull-ups, bicycles, furniture for their rooms, Soccer, T-Ball, soap and water for bathing, dishes, gasoline, a vehicle to take them to places, etc....not just diapers and a few wipes. The non custodial parent owes his child his financial support and should pay it to the custodial parent.

sounds like my dad! my dad thought after my mom got married he shouldnt have to pay child support cause my stepdad made so much money! It doesnt matter if he buys your son the things he needs when he is at his house or not! Child support is ment to help with all aspects of the childs life! You need your car to get him to the drs, your son needs the heat in your house, the water, the rent! You deserve child support!

You really need to have a case with your local county Friend of the Court. To avoid these kinds of problems and help with disputes, everything really should be handled by them. Sometimes they can be slow and a pain, but they can really help to.

His bills are his problem, as your's are your problem. They have nothing to do with child support. And buying diapers for his house is not considered child support. And he cannot dictate what you use the child support for as long as the child is being taken care of and not neglected (my husband was paying $114 a week for 1 child, the mom wouldn't even buy the girl a winter coat and the judge point blank told him he didn't get a say in it). Since I don't know what county you're in I can't give much more advice than that. Good luck!

I can see you have gotten alot of responses, but I haven't read them yet. There are so many single parents "out there", I think it's really sad. A child needs both parents. If you two can't work it out now, it's not going to get any easier as your baby's needs just get greater and more expensive. You might need to go to the Friend of the Court for some sort of arbitration about the money. I think they have some sort of number formula for all this. They look at both of your incomes and both of your expenses and take it from there. THEY decide who pays who how much.
I think it's great he takes baby while you are at work...no sitter bill AND he gets time with his dad and you don't have to supply food and diapers for 100% of the time. The most important thing here is that your baby feels loved and secure, has a roof over his head and food and diapers. You didn't say why you two aren't married and together, or why you have chosen NOW to get an apartment on your own when you really cannot afford it. One apartment is much less expensive than two. DUH!
Hopefully you can find some common ground on this or get some help finding the common ground. I would caution you though about Friend of the Court...once "they " are in your life, it's hard to get them out. Getting into the "system" leaves your life and everything about it open to all those snoopy government people. All the best to you and your baby!

Is he listed on the birth certificate? If not, he will have to be adjudicated as the parent of your child (through his signature or a DNA test). After that is done, all you need to do is call the child support enforcement agency (DHS) in your county and tell them that you would like to make an application for assistance with child support and they will take it from there. There may be a small fee to you, but usually they take it right out of the child support you receive. At that point, his wages will be garnished for the appropriate amount and the money will be deposited directly into your account for you to use however you see fit.

Don't let him "bully" you into not holding him accountable for his financial responsibility. The only one who will really suffer in that situation will be your child.

Good luck.

I'm not sure what the rules are for child support when you're not married. That said, child support is used to support the child with the parent they are LIVING with. He needs to contribute towards food, diapers, clothing, etc. If he won't give you money to do it, then he can buy the items directly.

Hopefully someone can give you info re. the legal aspects, but you may be stuck if there is no legal way to enforce child support when the couple isn't married.

Good luck!

Go to the Friend of the Court. He is obligated by law to pay unless you do not pursue it.

This is going to sound harsh, but go to Friend of the Court. Your boyfriend absolutely needs to pay child support. His child is more important than his cell phone bill. You need to have a legal document stating what he needs to pay.
That said, know that it may change the dynamic between the two of you. He will likely be upset that he needs to change his lifestyle to pay the support. And Friend of the Court will set up a visitation schedule that ensures that your boyfriend gets plenty of time with your son. Make sure you are okay with those consequences before you go in.
Good luck!

Journal for a month. Put all reciepts in a folder, everything you spend on your son. FOC. should be contacted. You are no longer in a relationship w/th ex. And tit for tat, does;t pay the bills. Winning an argument will not get you a check to aid in support. The friend of the court will. Stop talking to him.

Well...reminds me a lot of my mother and father. They were separated and my dad was supposed to pay child support. He drank heavily and when he was sober he'd always complain about how he was always "around", either fixing something at my moms house or "buying" something for my brother and I ...which was pretty rare. He would cook dinners occasionally, so I mean he was there partially. He told my mom the reason he drank is because he couldn't afford child support and also bullied her into going to court and signing off on all money owed. He never quit drinking, and blew tons of money gambling and on his beer and cigarettes. Bottom line- I wish she would have made him pay it, we wouldn't have had to struggle so badly growing up. Just some food for thought.

He needs to pay you support. We pay child support for my stepson, but when he is here we still have to take care of his basic needs. So your boyfriend buying things that he needs to care for you child at his house he is supposed to be doing.

Child support is for the support of the child, but that doesn't mean just food and diapers. you still have to cloth him, and shelter him, and pay all the bills associated with living.

in grand rapids, contact the friend of the court and they will help you. if you are receiveing any state aid at all, your case worker can direct you to that office as well. but friend of the court will help you out. They will be the ones you will deal with until your son turns 18. They do everything the custody and the child support. You need to get it done now, since you guys are speaking terms.

Talk to a lawyer that specializes in family cases like this, I agree you should record how much you spend each month on the baby in addition to your other expenses.

When my mom married my step-dad, they were doing okay money wise so they told my dad that as long as he set away money for my college fund, he didn't have to pay child support. Well, when I was fifteen, my dad decided that because I don't look anything like him or his family (he's full blooded Chinese and I had blond hair before i started coloring it and I have blue eyes); he never saved up any money for college and my parents had four years to try to save up money; they only were able to save up one year ... get a child support settlement in court to provide for your son's future. I wish you luck.

I see you have many responses I scaned through most of them. According to child support laws in every state support goes to the primary custodian for the following: Houseing, electric, water, food, heating, clothing. He is providing care for the child when he has him yes but if the those things do not come home with you that is not considered support. You have the child over 50 percent of the time then you are entilted support go to the friend of the court and file papers. You can work with them to set it at an amount you want don't let them fool you on that. But he is responsible for helping to pay for the basic needs while the child is with you no matter what he thinks. Although it goes on income. If they say set it at a level you believe is too much you can ask the courts to lower it. But think long and hard on that because once it is set it can only be readjusted every 2 years unless there is a change in cercumstances. i.e. you lose your job, he loses his job, you get a better job etc. If you feel it is to much I would advise putting so much into an account for your child for college or a rainy day (i.e.loss of all income) don't let him talk you into paying it directly to you because that becomes a hassle if he doesn't pay. Make it go through the state where it is taken out of his check before he gets it. Good luck I have been dealing with the courts and support for 17 years on two different children.

You could take your case to Friend of the Court and let them decide what is appropriate.