Boys and Barbies

It's perfectly normal and actually a good thing for little boys to play with dolls....and it is perfectly normal that dad would be concerned!The way I handled this is..I help my husband see what a good, loving attentive dad our little boy will be!!!! I asked him how boys could make a weapon out of everything from a banana to a vacuum without owning a gun?the same way he can love and nurture his Elmo or Barbie.... I actually didn't care for my daughter playing with Barbie all that much (15 yrs ago)until she got a job.....lol

E.,

Your son is fine. Mine is 4 1/2 and enjoys playing with dolls occasionally. I hear society talking in your question. Picture a nose in the air and a nasaly voice for this one: "Society says that boys need trucks and girls need dolls" Puh-leeze. Now picture me rolling my eyes. Don't let society dictate to you. I think we need more sensitive, caring guys around.

That being said, I was always playing with G.I. Joe's and trucks as a girl child 20 some years ago. Yes I'm a tomboy, and I'm proud of that fact.

Hope this helps,
Melissa

It's totally normal for boys to play with dolls and for girls to play with trucks. Studies have shown that toys don't influence gender-related behavior the way researchers once thought. I recently bought my sons a baby doll because they kept snatching the doll of a little girl I watch!

My husband was the youngest and had FIVE sisters - so I don't think he even knew "boy" toys existed until he started school! Not only did he turn out wonderfully well by anyone's standards, he's still a "guy's guy." He's former Army and currently works in law enforcement. He hunts. He fishes. He camps. He loves war game videos. (You get the idea.)

I do like to joke that my hubby is more evolved than the typical guy. He's not at all effeminate, but he's definitely more sensitive and more considerate than the norm. I don't know if this had anything to do with the girl toys . . . if anything it was probably more about being raised in a house full of females!

Boys playing with dolls in general is a good thing. They will learn empathy and compassion. Unless he never has any relationships in this life he will likely become a father or possibly an uncle to his siblings children. Unless he is just stripping them just to see them naked I would not worry about it. If he is, talk to him about why he wants to. Let him know that we all have our own body parts. Kids are just curious. If he watches any tv at all then he has probably seen commercials for Barbies and thinks they are great fun. That is the point of the commercial.

They have boy dolls - fireman, police men, husbands... I saw them at walmart. Your son is just playing house, what he see's everyday, nothing wrong with that.

Your son will be fine. Playing with dolls of any kind will NOT harm him in any way. Tell you husband to "GET REAL".

There is nothing wrong with boys playing with dolls. My brother played with them when we were kids. We each had our own dolls. It will help teach him how to be a good big brother and a good daddy some day. My son used to LOVE to (have me) wrap up his stuffed animals in recieving blankets and he would swaddle them and put them to bed and pat them, just like mommy and daddy did to him, and how he saw our friends doing with their babies. I'm sure he would still do it if I had not gotten TIRED of constantly re-wrapping his "babies". I think right now would be especially a good time for your son to be playing with dolls so he has a chance to play out some of the responsibilities. YOu could use it as such a learning tool to prepare him for when your little one arrives. Teach him how to do it all before the baby comes, when he feels left out due to the attention infants need, he can feel included by taking care of his own baby right next to you. Perhaps if your husband does not like barbies specifically, you can limit your sons barbie collection to what you have already given him to play with and get him some baby dolls. That might make an okay compromise. Your husband may not understand that a Mr. Potato Head is not the same as playing with dolls since you put a mr. potato head together like a mechanic or a builder or an engineer, but you play with and care for dolls the way you would a baby or child. Perhaps your husband can even show your son some of the things he will help with when the baby arrives and teach your son how HE does it so he has a male role model for it. Hope this helps!

When boys are that little, they probably relate to what their mom does with them. That's what they have learned so far. So if he wants to play with dolls, he is either nurturing them or socializing with them, both good traits. He will find his own style of play later.

My son always loved, and still loves, babies. When he was two, I got him a small baby doll. He didn't dress her at that age, just carried her around and loved her. If he left her somewhere, he would remember and call out for his baby. So, I bought the baby a stroller, but he never played with that. One day I folded up the stroller, it was like a stick on wheels folded up. He grabbed in and pulled it along and said, "vroom vroom truck." He is definately a boy, but he will be a loving, attentive, nurturing dad someday. If boys didn't like dolls, they wouldn't make the GI Joe dolls. Some men, and women, feel better about their son playing with dolls if it is a man doll with fighting gear.

Another point, is that boys do like pretty things. At some point, they like pretty girls. :)

I think it is great that your "hub didnt seem too bothered by his son playing with dolls." He is comfortable with his masculinity and doesn't feel threatened by his son playing with dolls. All the better for your son to grow up to be a great dad! If you are worried at all, get him a GI Joe doll and phase out Barbie, if ds will let you.

My 3 yo son doesn't play with barbies but only because we don't have any. I WISH I had saved my old barbies! However, he does like to dress up in princess costumes. At this age they do not distinguish gender-specific toys and play unless some idiotic adult makes them think that way. A toy is a toy, whether a barbie or a Mr. Potato head. A costume is a costume, whether a princess or a frog.

This sort of play will not "make" your boy a sissy. It will just make him have fun!

PS is the Darling he refers to from Lady and the Tramp?

Hi E., I am with the other mom's here. My son is 2 1/2 and he loves playing with his babies. He sleeps with them. I think it's great, and my Mexican Macho Husband has never said a word. :)
Also, the children I nanny for have two girls, so there are a couple of barbies around the house, and he gets 'em naked and plays with them, making them dance, and talk to each other. I am so NOT worried about it.
I am like another woman that said, I playd with lincoln logs, GI joes, leggos, ALL boy toys (I have 4 younger brothers) and I think it just prepared me to be a mom to two little boys!!
Your son is fine, and normal, take a breath....
L.