I have a son who is 18 months old who is in child care. A few months ago he was the child being bitten and now a few months later he is now the child who is bitting. Every day I'm getting reports that he bit a child. I'm so embrassed every night I come in. He never bits at home only at the child care. I have talked to the director and they have been trying things like putting him in time out, saying NO, and puttting him in a different room ( I think that is rewarding him but that's a different subject). I don't know what to do. I have called and talked to a nurse about it and I'm going to make a appointment to see his Ped.dr.. I really don't know what to do next but to sit with him for a few hours and watch what he is doing. Any input would be GREAT!!
Thanks for all your help. All the ideas I will keep in mind. The problem snowballed and we are now looking for child care. We were asked to find another facility.
awww this always comes up!
My daughter started the biting --and I let the caretaker bite her back gently!
It was never a problem after that!!
I love the vinegar idea! Never heard of that!
LHW
Response removed.
I really think he must be frustrated. Have you been in the classroom and observed how he acts with the other children while you are there? I just think it is strange how the bitee turned into the biter. Is it just one particular child or more? I would definitely ask the pediatrician as well.
I HAVE WORK IN CHILD CARE MYSELF..IT IS IN SOME CASES YOUR CHILD MIGHT BE DOING THIS CAUSE HE ARE SHE DOES NOT LIKE DAYCARE..IS THE CHILD DOING THIS AT HOME AS WELL? LOOK AT HIS TEACHER THERE MIGHT BE A PROBLEM THERE..THE CHILD MIGHT BE DOING THAT TO TAKE UP FOR THERE SELF.DAYCARE IS ALOT FOR A CHILD .. HOPE THAT WILL HELP.
Hey this may sound mean but Bite him back. I promise it works and that is advice that comes from not just me but many many women. My best friend and I whent thru this together. Her son was is daycare my daughter was not. Our kids are close they were next door neighbors 3m apart and say each every day. He got bit at daycare just like your son. Then starting bitting Bella very hard!!almost every day. My friend felt horrible but I told her it wasn't her fault. Her Mom my Mom and 15 other people said bit him. So she did it only took 2 times and he didn't bite again. But you need to observe him at daycare too and find out why he is bitting he may have a reason. Teachers aren't always watching then they hear crying. So I would make sure he isn't being bit 1st or provoked. even though it's no exuse still. This is a shore phase and it will be over soon. They normally bite is a playing environment so if you are playing with him or try to take something away he'd bite you too. Also if you had a playdate at your house I'd observe carefully. But my advice if you catch him bitting or he bites you bite him back not hard b/c it's really just going to hurt his feeling a little and then he wil associate bitting someone with hurting in general hopefully. Thats the idea.
Be patient your a good mother it's not your fault
C.
My children weren't biters but my sister had a little boy that kept biting her daughter. They started making him bite into a lemon (rine and all) everytime he bit. It helped.
Hope you find something to stop him
M.
Hi C.. My son went through exactly the same thing. And coming from a child care teacher, let me just say that this is developmentally appropriate. One thing I did is just remind him that we bite apples. We dont bite people. Go over the things that we can bite. The other thing (that really helped) is I made a Biting Book. I cut out pictures (magazines) of things we can bite and cant bite. Put words to it, and read it. For example on one page you may have an apple. On the next, a picture of a child. When you read it you may say, "Can we bite an apple? Yes, apples are good for us. What about our friends? Can we bite our friends? No, biting hurts. It makes us sad". You get the idea. And on top of that...be patient. I know how frustrating it can be, but they DO grow out of it.
Good Luck.
My advice is vinegar. I babysat for a child who did this and her mother told me no time-outs, no spankings, but vinegar in her mouth after a bite. After two days of that taste she quit. Hope this helps.
Most kids do this...it is a phase. If your child cannot talk...it could be frustration. If your child is teething...it could be that. There are so many scenarious. Keep a watchful eye. It takes a little more effort, but when you see him going in for the bite, try to redirect him to another activity. I agree witha previous post, don't punish. This too shall pass. It is by no means a reflection of your parenting. :) Good luck!
Don't worry about it. Just a stage. My first daughter was always the one that got bit and never bit anyone, my second daughter is 18 months and in daycare. I was getting sometimes 3-4 reports daily. Do not punish him. She recently was moved up to a classroom with kids a little bit older than her, it is bigger and a lot more activities(coloring/chalk board/games) and she has not bitten anyone since the move. I think that they are bored in the surroundings and w/the kids that are younger (even if they are only 2 months younger). One thing that the daycare did that worked was to get an electric toothbrush and about the time that she was biting everyday, they would let her put it in her mouth, like she was brushing her teeth, and that helped. I know it sounds crazy, but the stimulation works. Also, they went from 2 naps a day to 1 and I noticed a lot more kids were biting. I think they are tired and it is just a reaction. Don't worry, its normal. There is nothing wrong with him, except that he might be a little strong minded and that is not a bad thing.
K. / Franklin, TN
My little girl who is now 23 months old had a bitting issue when she was 19-20 months old. She almost got kicked out of daycare. We found that she was not verbal like the other kids in her class and she was getting frustrated. We would watch her reactions to things and see what she was getting frustrated about and try to intervene before she responded. When she did bite we would bend down to her level and take our hands and turn her head to look at us straight in the eyes and tell her no biting, that is not nice, it hurts...ouch. We took a Thursday and Friday off work and worked with her for four days straight on that and it worked! Good luck with that it is very frustrating, but it is a phase that alot of kids go through, some more than others.
I have a 17 month old who has been in this situation. One of the things I learned is that biting is learned. So since he doesn't do it at home, he probably learned it at daycare, and had found it to be an effective way to get his point across. The best thing to do is first is understand that he is just trying to communicate. You might want to consider showing him other ways of dealing with frustration (American Sign Language for hurt) I also gave him toys that he could use to handle his frustration, like hammer and "pounding" toys.
I found that this can also be brought on by teething. Giving a little something to numb the teeth might help as well.
Just some thoughts, let me know if it helps or I can tell you some of the other things we tried.
I have never tried this one but i heard from several people to put baby orajel on the babies gums when he/she bites. They dont like that numbing feeling and it does no harm to the child. Let me know if this works.
One thing that our daycare in Baton Rouge used to do was make the child who bit place the ice on the child s/he bit, go through an apology, etc. That let the child know that his/her behavior had consequences, and that when you harm someone you have to make some sort of reparation for having done so.
Of course, when my daughter started biting (only did it at home), we tried this and were less than successful at getting her to understand the point. But, it might work for some children, and it's well worth a shot!
: )
