Birthday Invites

I'm also a twin - I say invite just the one. My sister and I HATED being treated as a unit and not individuals and like a previous poster said, it was silly for us to be invited to things where we weren't really friends just because the other one was invited. If the parents have issue with it they can either work it out with you or not come. I don't think it is remotely rude.

hmm I know that's tricky but I would probably just invite the one triplet who's the BFF. I know it can get sticky, but just explain to the mom that you're keeping the party small. You could go with the "we're trying to keep expenses down" thing - that's a subtle way of saying that you don't want to pay for extra people for the pool, and I understand what you mean! Parties can get very expensive very quickly!!! Good luck!

Invite only the one child who is your child's friend...no explanation needed. I have twins and would never expect one of them to be invited just because they are a twin. My kids make their own friends and are fine when one is invited and the other is not. Of couse they are sometimes disappointed, but we have taught our kids (all 4 of them) that sometimes their siblings will get to do neat things that they won't get to do, and sometimes it will be the opposite. That's the way life works, so better to gently teach them early then have them expect certain treatment as young children then meet with reality at a later age.

I don't see what's wrong with treating the BFF like an individual and not 1/3 of a set of triplets. If your child wasn't friends with the other two, don't invite them. Those kids probably are expected to do EVERYTHING together and it might be a nice change for one of them to actually have their very own invitation. A girl in my daughter's class was a twin and the mother had them in different classrooms so that they could each make their own friends and not always be seen as "the twins". My daughter wasn't friends with the sister, so only the twin in her class got a birthday invitation. I actually didn't even know there WAS a twin until much, much later. Even if I had, I wouldn't have automatically invited the other sister just because they were twins. If your daughter's BFF's mother has a problem with only one of her kids being invited, just tell her the truth: it's a very small party and your daughter REALLY, REALLY wanted her BFF there. I can't imagine the mother being rude enough to insist her other two come to the party, too.

I don't think you have to treat triplets any different than any other sibling situation. If your child is friends with one person from that family...that's the child you invite. LIke any sibling, it is a lesson that you don't do everything the same or "together" all the time... probably even a more critical lesson for multiples. As with any family with siblings (and especially a pool party at a young age), make sure they know they are welcome to stay. You mentioned it is a public pool, so certainly they can pay for their entrance and enjoy the day. Birthday parties are sometimes hard situations to navigate through, but I think most people are very understanding. Good luck!

I would just invite the 1 he is friends with. No reason to invite the others. Especially if your son is not close to them. I know someone else suggested you should invite them all as daycare may be a problem for the mom but realistically daycare for someone else is not your problem. I would totally skip that thought. Invite the couple kids and have a good time.

As a twin, I can tell you that we often were invited to things together by someone with whom really only one of us was friends; we thought this was really silly. Triplets and twins are individuals just like singletons, and it should be ok for you to only invite the BFF. While twins (especially identicals) have a different kind of connection than non-twins, and chances are good that two of the triplets are closer to each other than to the third, are you planning to invite the siblings of the other kids you're inviting? Probably not, and everyone would say that's ok; therefore, it should be ok to not invite all three of these siblings as well. Best of luck with your party! :)
-Christina

Call the Mom. Your daughter should have her friend there.I am sure the Mom of triplets want them to have individuality.

Invite your daughter's BFF. Only.
When we have parties, and my kids are friends with the sibling... we invite that sibling. NOT all the siblings.
The parents understand.

Throughout those triplets life... the parents cannot possibly 'expect' that all 3 will be invited everywhere for every occasion... and it then gets expensive for the host.... and the parents, have to understand that.
I may seem cold... but that is reality.
We have friends with triplets and another close friend with 3 kids... I told them, since i know them well, that I cannot pay for all 3 kids... and that my daughter is friends with 1 of them. Not all. It is up to the parent, to teach their kids those lessons too....
It can be a real 'burden' for the host or gift giver... when there are triplets. And it is not always the case where you 'have to' invite all of them.

I have even a few years ago, told the Mom of the triplets we know, that we can no longer exchange Christmas presents... because we simply cannot afford it... and we have our own kids and budgets and grandparents to buy for and think about.

on the invitation... what I do also to limit the attendees and cost for me... is I say on the invitation "your child and 1 adult is invited to... such and such party..." thereby, you delineate the party that you are having and the budget.

all the best,
Susan

Has your child had play dates with the one triplet without the other 2? I'd say if their friendship is pretty well established and has been shown to not include the other two then I think it's fine to invite only one although I would talk to the mom first just to let her know why. If your child has only played with this friend at preschool and has never done anything with just the one outside of school I would probably not invite just one. I would either skip it altogether or go ahead and invite all 3.

I understand wanting to keep the list small, but would it really be that bad to invite all the kids from the preschool class of your child's gender? I did that for my daughters 6 b-day (invited all of the girls from her kindergarten class) which was 12 girls including my daughter. Only 7 showed up which I've found to be about typical for parties. That's not a huge party and that way I've invited all of the girls without anyone feeling left out.

Good luck,
K.

I say invite the one child and if the mom wants to bring the other two she will call you and ask if it is ok and offer to pay for them.

I have 4 kids all who are pretty close in age and I usually ask if it is ok and offer to pay. To do otherwise is totally uncool.

Good luck.

Thats hard...I have a BFF just like that but I would invite her,explain that you want to keep it small and not brake the bank...If she is your BFF she will understand. If you don't invite her some where it will come and might make for a sticky situation...Good Luck and Enjoy the Day:)

I would talk to the mom. Tell her that all three are welcome but that you know only one is really friends with your kiddo so it would not hurt your or your kids feelings if just the one triplet showed up and let the mom decide. I would also tell her that you do not want to invite the whole class so please do not talk about the party with the other moms/kids. If they were older I would say it was OK to invite just the one but at 5 years old I don't think they are old enough to understand and not get their feelings hurt especially if they are all in the same class together.

you have to invite the three triplets or none at all. I am a twin and we did everything together. Never once did only one of us get invited to do something unless it was our own plan or a project for school or something.

A little late but I'll throw in my 2 cents. With children this age, personally I would invite all of them even if not in the same class. That is what I have done with my kids invites. If the triplets are all in your childs class, again yes, I would invite them all. If the other 2 kids were not in your childs actual class, then you could possibly get away with not including on the invite but expect that the other 2 may need to come, especially if childcare is not readily available for the mom.

I have my son's bday party coming up, who is also turning 5. I have only invited 3 children from his prek class. 1 he is very close to and they play outside of school & the other 2 friends he will go to elem school with. We also have twins coming....he plays with the boy but not with the girl. I expect parents will frequently need to bring the siblings as I sometimes need to do....if we are to come. Until you start having "drop off" parties, this is how it works.

Have fun at your party!!!

I would just send the invite in the one friend's name. Just because they are triplets doesn't mean they have to have the same friends. If I had triplets (God bless those who do, but thank God I don't!) I would understand. The only issue I would have, is if I didn't have anyone to watch the other two. Anyway, thats my two cents.