Binkie Dilemma!

My younger daughter was obsessed with her binky from birth until 2.5, when the dentist told us we had to take it away (causing problems with her teeth). On the advice of some Mamapedia moms, I cut the tips off of all the binkies in the house. My daughter went to the binky drawer (yes, we had an entire drawer for them) and tried them one after the other. She got a puzzled look and told me, "They're all broken!" And that was the last of it. She never wanted them after that. Honestly I had been prepared for weeks of drama, tears, and everything else. But all it took was to "break" the binkies by cutting the tips off, and she didn't want them anymore! Easiest thing in the world. You could've knocked me over with a feather.

Maybe it will work for you, too. Good luck!

This might sound weird but I miss when my kids used binkies! I always thought they looked so cute! Now when I'm out and about and I see a baby with a binkie I just smile.

O.K. now to my story how my kids kicked the habit...with my daughter, she just didn't want it anymore at about age 2. My son he was still attached to it at age 3 and I made a promise to myself that by his 3rd birthday, bye bye binkie. Yeah right!! LOL

Not long after his 3rd birthday, we were reading a book called the Selfish Crocodile. In the book the crocodile gets a tooth ache from a cracked tooth. The crocodile was in a lot of pain and crying from the toothache! A mouse comes out of nowhere and pulls out the crocodile’s tooth. My son looked at me with big eyes and asked “why did his tooth go bad” and I responded with “well because he used a binkie for too long and it messed up his teeth” (don’t ask me why I said that I just wanted to see what he would do LOL). Without another word he got up, went to his bed, picked up his binkie, walked over to the trash can and threw it away. Then he said "I don't want my teeth to fall out Mommy!" He never looked back!!! Seriously!!!

Like some others said I was totally prepared for tears, tantrums, fighting, etc. when I finally just took it away. In the end, he took it away from himself. He was in control =-)

Hopefully some of the suggestions you’ve received today will work. Good luck!

I saw one of those Super Nanny shows where the family had the same problem. The Nanny told the child about little kids who don't have binkies and how the binkie fairy tries to find binkies for these kids. They told the little girl that the binkie fairy needed her binkies to give to the little babies who have none. They gathered them all from around the house, tied them together with a bunch of balloons and sent them to the binkie fairy. The next day there was a surprise (little gift) in the back yard, hanging from the tree as a thank you from the fairy. I remember this show, because I thought it would be a good idea for my girls when they got old enough. I got lucky. They both broke themselves at about 6-7 months. They never were really into them though. Now if I could get one to stop biting and the other to stop pulling hair!

Hi Becca,

My nephew gave me his binkie for my new baby when he was eight. Yes, eight. It was hard for him, but he knew my little one would appreciate it. He of course, never let a friend see it but he always had it with him. He's a well adjusted 25 year old now and I actually have thought about returning it to him for his kids.....when they get here.

I personally don't think holding on to it is going to scar anyone but you may suggest giving to another little one that would REALLY appreciate and need it. Who knows how generous he would be?????

God bless,

M.

My son had his longer than I would have liked as well (we just took it about a month ago at 23 months), but I will agree with another poster who said that taking it was a lot easier than I anticipated with BOTH of my kids. My son was particularly obsessed with it and wouldn't leave it in his bed, so I just had to do it cold turkey and be done with it. He probably cried for 2 nights without it (he still has his small blankie/lovey) and that was the end of it. My daughter was the same way. I kept thinking it was going to be this huge ordeal and really, it was fine. I am not sure I would take that approach with your son since he is so much older. I would either try to reason with him and work out some sort of reward thing or gather them all up and tell them you're giving them to other babies that need them and just get rid of them all! Don't keep ANY in your house or they will find them and you'll have to start all over. You can also do the "snip the end" trick and they will lose their suction. Then, you can tell them they are broken and throw them in the trash. There are several ways and they all work, so pick one you're comfortable with. Since my kids were younger when we got rid of them (16 and 23 months), I just decided "out of sight, out of mind" and ditched them, but again, may not be the best approach for your older one. Good luck to you! It really won't be as bad as you think. You just have to do it. :-)

First of all binkies are very very soothing for kids and are great for them when they are tired, sad, scared, or sick. Kudos to you for looking at ways to wean your son off of his, it is always difficult to deal with these big changes especially when you don't know how they will react & how much they really understand. One great thing is that your kids are only using their binkies at bedtime and I bet too that they probably fall out of their mouths at some part during the night so that is good too, it is really more of a worry and concern if they were using them all day long. But I completely understand that you are ready to get rid of them. My niece was super attached to her binkie and when she was 4 the "binkie fairy" came. They left all of her binkies in the mailbox at night, she gave them all a last suck, & said good bye and then in the morning the "binkie fairy" had left her a card saying thank you that the binkies were going to babies that didn't have binkies and also left her a small big girl gift. My sis-in-law thought for sure that my niece was going to be devastated and not understand but she was totally fine with it. Now I do know that the first night without the binkies my niece did ask for them but she was reminded briefly about the binky fairy and then just redirected to another subject. Good luck, I would say that you can try with the 16month but that may be more difficult, I would just follow the 16 month old's lead & see how things go. Best of luck to you all!

No reminders from me! My 4.5 year old still has one. But she's a whole different story. My 2 year old also has one and I think once big sis gives hers up, little sis will too. We've tried the binky fairy, rewards, you name it. She gets upset and frustrated REALLY easily--and night terrors too-- and it is one of the few things that calms her down. She does have a little spot where her top teeth stick out but hopefully that will go away when she gets older and gets permanent teeth. She is now getting old enough that she knows her teeth look a little funny. I've shown her pictures of kids with VERY buck teeth that I found online and that does motivate her to stop but not quite yet....Good luck. Once you figure it out, be sure to let us know so we can try it! :)

My son was 16 months when we got rid of his pacifier. He did great! I poked holes in it with a needle to start (just two or three.. not sure that really did anything ha ha). Then a couple of days later I snipped of just the very end with scissors. It was really funny because he put it in his mouth, took it out and looked at it, put it in his mouth, and took it out again. He did this several times and finally just kept it in. You could tell he was thinking, "This thing is broken! But I guess I'll still us it anyway." After a day or two I snipped of just a little more. Did that a couple of times and then one day I just put him down for his nap without it. He looked at me like aren't you forgetting something? But I left and he didn't even cry. End of story. It kind of helped that he is attached to his blankie so he still had that. Good luck with whatever you decide!

I would break them at the same time also. I think it will be difficult for your older one to understand that his sister still has one and not him, which in turn might cause resentment.

I've taken away a paci at 18 months for my older daughter and then at 29 months for my youngest at separate times. Both loved their paci's so I thought each time it was going to be so hard. In both scenarios it ended up being so easy. My advice when you do end up making the decision whichever way you do it, just stick with it don't give in.

My son had his binky until close to 3 years old.
We had to get rid of it, because it was deforming his mouth/bite.
Even when his mouth was closed... there was a "gap" between his top and bottom teeth... like a 'hole' where the binky is.
His mouth/teeth would therefore not close all the way.

In time, the mouth will/does revert back to its original formation. But it can take anywhere from 6 months to a year. My son's mouth, luckily, did correct itself.

All we did, to stop his binky was tell him that we were going to give it to Santa... to help the other children. Then with him, we gathered up all the binkies in the house, put them in a bag, and we told him we'd mail it. He was fine with that. It took him only 2 days of getting used to it. But he didn't tantrum or get upset. And he still slept fine.

just what happened in our situation. My son, used his binky ALL the time. All day. Not just at sleep. He was hard-core.

All the best,
Susan

Excuse me, no one has the right to tell you your children should not have binkies. It is your choice, and theirs.

I had to take my daughter off "sucking" anything very young age. But she found what she needed right on the end of her hand. It's very easy to let a child have a binkie until they don't need to suck anymore and just forget about it but removing a finger is difficult to say the least. They can find what they need with a blanket, a stuffed toy, a pillow corner, etc....

If they need to suck they will find something to suck. Period, it is an urge not a choice.

My daughters jaw is recessed, her teeth are bad, everything that happened happened because she wasn't ready to give the binkie up. She fell off the couch on to the rim of a bottle and knocked out a tooth, the only way to save the baby tooth was to push it back up and stop her sucking. it didn't stop the sucking but she still had the tooth until she was losing her baby teeth.

My mom said that I paid for my new tricycle with my binkie. My first son, it was an accident...the dog got to the pacifier and I couldn't find the second one that fell behind the crib. Well when I gave him the pacifier he would not take it and went to sleep without it. (He did have a special blanket that he sleeps with, so I think that helped. He likes to rub the silky side) My second son, I cut off the nipple. He has an attitude though, if you take something away from him then he does not want it back. Anyways it was kind of easy because 'how dare I do that to him' that he didn't want a pacifier any more. (Same as my first, my second also had a blanket he liked to hold)

We had our doctor tell our daughter when she turned 3 that her "paci" is yucky and she needed to throw it in the trash since she was a big girl now. Each day after that, we put all her pacis (she had a whole collection) into a bowl and she threw one paci into the trash every night before bed. About 2 weeks later, she kissed the last one goodbye, thanked it for being there for her and said she didn't need it because she was a big girl. We expected a scream fest all night because our daughter is a big screamer. But no such thing. She just went to sleep. We couldn't believe it! She still talks about the doctor telling her to throw her pacis away; I think that really helped, plus the gradualness of throwing them away gave her time to think about it in a tangible way. Like your son, it did not appear that she understood the gravity of the situation but she did. He'll be fine as long as you (and the doctor) tell him it's not for big kids.

Good luck!

I'd honestly keep your younger one on it - it's such a soothing mechanism, and at that age, communication is difficult, so I personally wouldn't have a problem with it.

Our daughter has struggled stopping the use of hers, but she's slowly weaning herself at just past 2. I feel badly, kind of hypocritical, though, because her brother is a thumb sucker, and the recommendation from the pediatrician was to let him wean naturally which will happen around the time he starts kindergarten (he's cut back dramatically in recent months - he's almost 4).

So, perhaps, you can have a big kid talk with your older child that it's time to give them away, but that his younger sister can still use them because she's a baby.

That's a tough one - good luck!

Start putting little holes in the binkies. Your 16 month old could start getting rid of hers. Once my little ones were walking I only let them use their binkies at night time, and once they were moved to their big kid bed they couldn't have them at all. With our oldest we just lost them (accidently) and he didn't need them anymore. With our twins we had to cut slits in them and when they would try to suck on them it would go flat and they couldn't suck on them so my son would come to me and say "not work" and we'd say it's broken so go throw it away and he would throw it away and not worry about it....our daughter would continue to suck on them so we actually had to take and cut a slit in the binkie to where it was practically in half, then she would give them up. It wasn't a big struggle and they didn't cry much over them.

I think I would break them at the same time- I think 18 months is about the oldest that they should still have a pacifier .

both of my girls were BEYOND obsessed with theirs... I thought there was no way i could get rid of them. When they were around 2, I just got rid of them... no ceremony, no pomp and circumstance... i just said "all gone!"... and they took it surprisingly well!!! I say go for it... break them both of it at the same time!

My boys were almost 5 before we tossed them lol you have your reasons and I had mine.

I would do them at the same time. If your son will have a problem with his sister still having hers. I know with in a month of the boys tossing theirs my daughter walked over to the trash can and tossed hers on her own. She wanted to be a big girl like her brothers but she was also 3 at the time. Just make sure you throw them all away at once. Its to easy to keep one just in case and cave at the smallest want from a child. I had a friend who did that not just once but many many times. In the end it just made it harder on her son. Good luck to you and your kids.

I can't offer any suggestions regarding weaning your children off pacifiers, but something about your question struck me. If you tie them to balloons and release the balloons, where will that big bunch of plastic end up? It won't be magically finding its way to a landfill! It might end up in someone else's yard for them to throw away, washed into a waterway where an animal could become entangled or choke and die on it or one more piece of litter cluttering our beautiful land. Please consider one of these other ideas as a way to remove the pacifiers from your kids lives. Thank you!

I think we, as parents, make a bigger issue out of the binkie than it really is. With both of my boys, I just got rid of them, explaining that they were "all gone!" and within a day they were totally forgotten.

I don't know if he is too old for his binky, I think that will be up to you and him!! I think I would be ready by the time my son is 3, but it would be tough I think. You're right, having the baby with one will be hard. Maybe this is a great time to really play up the "big boy/big brother" time for him. Especially since he told you he is a baby too. Make him proud to be a big boy. And who knows, maybe by the time he is 4 your little one will be ready to give up the bink as well. Good luck!