L.B.
First of all, You are doing a great job with them, its the toughest job in the world being a single parent and you dont have someone to tag team with to help. Secondly, as sad as this is, they probably have different personalities that clash. My sister and I acted as though we hated each other when we were growing up (now we are very very close)and somedays I thought I did hate her. She was the explosive type and I was more laid back, but I loved to make her mad. (I dont know if it was a sick obsession or just the devil in me lol) Mom was very consistent with us and we both got into trouble, even if it was the other's fault to start it. No we fought until we left home, (this is not a downer, please) but today we are best of friends. I know its hard to listen to the fighting, so try to find ways for them to have their own person space, even if they have to share a room at night. They also are at the age where you can talk to them and explain to them how their fighting with each other makes YOU feel. If they dont have chores to do, line up somethings other then TV and toys to keep them busy--my kids love helping me and we make into a game while spending some time together cleaning up. But give them chores they can do on their own too. My son unloads the dishwasher every morning since kindergarden. My daughter who is only 2 sets the table. Good Luck and I hope I have help.