My 4 year old is not sleeping in her room by herself. My question is how many times per night should i walk her back to her own room before giving this up? She follows me back to my room when i try doing this.
Thanks,
K. a.
Again, don't give up...be consistant. You should really watch some of the Supernanny techniques (normally I would never suggest a tv show), she really has some neat ideas on both the time out and the staying bed techniques. Best wishes and good luck with this as well as the time outs.
1,642,811 times or until she stops following you
The best advice I can give you is this...
Say what you mean and mean what you say. She is trying to wear you down and you need to keep putting her back in bed and time out until she learns that she has to stay there. If you give up, you don't mean what you say and that will lead to even bigger problems.
When I was that age, I did that too. I just felt all lonely and scared in my room by myself at night. I would walk down our long dark hallway, to go to my parents room, and squeeze in between them. They let me. I didn't do it to be a pain. I just felt lonely and missed them.
I grew out of it.
Kids at this age, also have night-time fears. Of noises, of being alone, of the dark, or anything. Its developmental.
Or, you just keep taking her back to her room. Maybe one day she will grow out of it. Each child being different.
Or, let her sleep in the floor, or your room. Or give her her own flashlight to have in bed with her. Or a lovey etc.
All the best,
Susan
K.,
I have a 4 year old that doesn't want to sleep by herself either. The biggest thing I can share with you is keep doing it over and over and over and over and over and over until she stays in her room. She will stop coming out. I learned this from Supernanny. IT WORKS!!! This is how I have been able to get my tantruming 4 year old to stay put during a time-out. You don't say anything when you take her to bed. Don't get upset or emotional. Just take her by the hand and put her in her room. Go to bed. If she follows, turn around and do it again. I watched Supernanny where there was a kid that they had to walk back to the room for 2 solid hours. The next night, it was maybe an hour. The night after that, even less until it stopped. Once the kids realize that you mean what you say, they will comply. I have done this myself so I know it works.
Good luck!
My solution to this was to turn the door knob around backwards. I gave my kids the choice, they could stay in their room with the door open, or they could stay in their room with the door locked (I always unlocked it after they fell asleep). After a couple of times they didn't want to have the door locked, so they stayed in.
Why is she coming out of her room? Find out why.
Is she afraid of the dark? My first child was... a night light solved that problem.
Does she think a monster is in the room? My second child thought that... we went on a monster hunt to make sure there were no monsters in the room... then we put out a bowl of jelly beans in the room to protect the room (because, of course, monsters don't like jelly beans and won't be in the room with jelly beans... LOL whatever works!)
Did she have a bad dream? Sometimes kids just need to feel safe, and the safest place is probably with you. It won't hurt your daughter developmentally if once in awhile you let her sleep with you. All 3 of my kids sleep with my husband and I every once in awhile due to bad dreams. I would say my 2 and 3 year olds climb into our bed maybe once every 3-4 months (not at the same time thank goodness! LOL) My 6 year old hasn't climbed into our bed for over 2 years... but she knows she can come in if she needs comfort.
But if you find out why she keeps coming into your room, you can problem solve to take care of that! Good luck!
Try telling her before you go through your night time routine that tonight you are going to try something different. Let her know that every time she gets out of her room, you are going to take her back but when you leave, you are going to take something with you. A stuffed animal, special blanket, etc. I did this with my almost 3 year old son, and the first night, I took just about everything away. The next night, only a few things, and the following night, nothing. He hasn't gotten up at all since. Good luck!
If you want her to sleep in her room, never give up. I know it can be hard, but in the end you will enjoy your own peaceful nights. I loved the previous response. :-) Good luck.
