Balancing New Baby & Toddler

yeahhhh!
It's a tough few months to get through, but you will make it, it does get better, and in the end it's so much fun.
Mine are 21 mos apart.
I'm all for the coffee idea ... I still do it ... and I'm breastfeeding. I know the caffine passes on some, but I don't see my little one any worse for wear. =)
If the older one does bottles or sippy cups, have the first one of the day ready before you go to bed. (an easy chore for your husband)
The other tip I received, was that when you first introduce the baby to your toddler, make sure the baby is in a bassinett, or on a bed, but that neither you or the Daddy are holding baby. This helps with the whole initially jealousy thing. Hold your toddler as you introduce him/her to the baby.
We did that ... I don't know that it made a difference or not, but it seems to make sense.
Hope all goes well!

Congratulations!

Mine are 17 months apart. One of the nurses at the hospital told me to make sure that I "touch" my toddler whenever possible. On the arm, foot, head - just to let him know that I am aware of his presence. I know it sounds weird, but I still make a conscious effort to touch him especially when his sister is very needy. It has kept us connected. Some days all I seem to do is tend to need after need and others flow with true quality time included. I agree with lowering your expectations about the house and what you should get done. Also, use the help that is offered. We have no family in the area, but I have had friends offer to watch one or the other or just to come over and hang out with us - it took me awhile but I do now take them up on their offers. You do get into your own rhythm, but remember how much they change in the first year so that rhythm has to be adjustable.

Good luck!

Been there, done that.lol Good Luck. My kids are 18 months apart. Both in diapers at the same time (they are way out of diapers now, just going down memory lane is all). It may be hard at first but eventually you will have your own system down to a science. It may seem overwhelming at first but know that they do eventually work together. If the 19 month old still takes naps, remember have the toddler AND the baby sleep at the same time...and YOU sleep when they sleep. You need all the energy you can muster! Good Luck I know you will do great!

BZ,

my last two babies are 13 months apart. I had the same anxiety you have right now :)

All I can tell you is... you find a way. Your makeup won't get done every day, you may not have much time to eat healthy meals, heck, you may not have time to shower every day...

Simplify as much as possible. baby proof the area GOOD - because my son really took advantage of me feeding the baby and decided to get into everything!

Make coffee the night before, if you drink it.

Set out your older child's meals the night before

Look into doing some 'meal planning'. The first few months I would spend a few hours saturday while my husband was dealing with the kids and chop veggies, blanch and freeze, and cut up and season meats for dinners during the week and freeze, I would put all the ingredients for a dinner in a big ziploc bag and then the day we were going to eat that meal, i would pull it out first thing in the morning, pop it in the fridge and then by about 4 I would throw it in the skillet, or crock pot.

If you have some good recipes for soup, make some and freeze a meals worth (my last kid made our family a family of 6 so I needed big batches to make it worth my time). Pasta Fagioli is a very filling soup.

Maybe your 19 month old will be helpful - she will probably want to help you take care of the baby so she can probably get your diapers or talk to the baby while you change a diaper...

And then lastly... lower your expectations for everything else (house, toilets, whatever) and just try to sit back and say 'ahhhh, welcome to my crazy life' with a big smile... they're only this young once :) Enjoy! and early congrats!

My 2 girls are 20 months apart. It wasn't as hard as I thought it was going to be.....I hope you'll find it the same. I always made sure to include my older one in "helping" with the new baby. She loved to watch me feed the new baby and helped to hold the bottle. She also played "mommy" to her own dolls. It's a great time of year, so it's great you will be able to go on walks with the two and do those sorts of things to allow your toddler time outside during nice weather. The baby will be sleeping alot and make sure you take advantage of that time to spend time with your toddler.

Good luck! It goes by SOOO fast. My girls are BEST friends. I love the age difference.

Congratulations! Mine are 12 mos apart so I can relate :)

Do you remember your first 3-4 mos with your first? Newborns are challenging so be sure to give yourself time to get over the new baby challenges. It gets easier! Get on schedules for meals, naps, outside activities as soon as possible and as they both continue to grow, they will continue to share schedules making your life so much easier.

Spend time as you are now with the toddler. It is easy to engage the older with toys on the floor with the baby on its blanket next to you too. Getting the older quickly accustomed to having the sibling around without much interfering will make for easy transitions.

Stay loud! My kids sleep through the most incredible noises since we were never a "shhhh house" - lol Get baby used to the older's voice and running around, etc right from the start.

Involve the older in the care of the baby and, even though the baby can't do the same, act as if baby can. This helped us prevent regression - "Ok, baby, we need to get older his lunch.." said as the younger was in my arms or in a carrier. Keeps it "equal" if you know what I mean so we weren't always doing things for the infant!

Hope this helps!