BAbyWise

Hi!
I used the Babywise method after it was recommended to me by a friend. I loved it! My son is a GREAT sleeper now(8 months old) and we have never had any problems getting him to sleep at night. He slept through at night around 8 weeks old! My friend now has her second and uses the method again--and her baby is high needs with reflux. It took a little longer, but she is 12 weeks and sleeping through the night!
Give it a try!! Good Luck!!

I would do some googling before you use BabyWise as a reference. I only saw an earlier edition of it (apparently they cleaned it up after being denounced by just about every child-rearing expert as abusive) and it was awful. I hope the newer versions are less drastic. The book I had said that babies could be sleep trained at 2 weeks old - seriously deluded and sick people wrote it.

Newborns don't need schedules. They NEED to have their needs met, for their physical and emotional well-being.

There are other sleep experts who can give you good information without making bedtime a contest between babies and their mothers. "Happy Sleep Habits Happy Child" and Ferber's book, which I can't remember the name of offhand, will give you great ideas and sleep training plans without the crazy attitudes. I think they both recommend waiting on sleep training until 3-4 months old at the earliest. Plus, both books were written by reputable, university researchers who run sleep clinics and have real-world experience (not lunatic "biblical" ideas about how babies are supposed to obey, please - although how "biblical" is he, he got kicked out of his church.)

Edited to add - you asked about our babies - my first had colic and a very difficult temperament - we used a modified sleep training plan based on Ferber (starting at about 4 1/2 months). The second was an easy temperament but didn't sleep through the night until he was about a year old. We co-slept with him (I mean, in the same room - I would bring him into bed to nurse when he woke up).

They are now almost-3 and 6 and sleep from 7-6:30 (+ nap) and 8-7:00 (respectively) every night, no night wakings unless they are sick, and very few arguments at bedtime. You don't have to be extreme, or start at an insanely early age, to have kids who sleep well.

http://www.babycenter.com/refcap/baby/babysleep/8369.html (babywise on Ezzo)

http://www.ezzo.info/

Here's a Christian parenting board opposed to Ezzo: http://www.awareparent.net/

I got this book and toddler wise book from my mother who is a daycare provider (30 years experience) and I can't tell you what a huge impact it made on getting my dd on a sleep and eat pattern. I began at around 2 months with these methods and haven't looked back since. She's now 18 months and is a champion sleeper and a decent eater. I would recommend these books to anyone. I don't know that I could follow it word for word but the general idea for it and the sleep eat patters are a winner! My daughter was very colicky and had bad reflux for the first 3-4 months and this helped me get her on a schedule. I did find that for my daughter, during her colicky episodes, if I sad her up with the front of her held close to me and sat and bounced on one of those excercise balls she was happy as a clam and it's a pretty comfy place to sit and bounce for a while! Good luck!

I received this book when my first (boy--now 5 years who has ADHD) was 10 weeks old. He was SO fussy and it DID work to get him on a somewhat predictable schedule--sleeping was so much easier using babywise. The pattern sleep, eat, play really helped him. I have no patience with rocking and tiptoeing to lay him down only to have him wake right up again. Sleep deprivation is killer--so I only used it for the sleeping/eating pattern which was a lifesaver. I have used it on all my babies (3 now), and my 3 month old daughter is now sleeping 10-12 hours as of a week ago! She was tricky to get days and nights switched around, literally took the 1st 8 weeks, but I stuck with it knowing it would work. I'm very pleased, and also starting to get sleep once again. Good Luck.

M.
Montgomery

I read Babywise and thought it seemed so liberating. I was so ready to do it. Then I read Dr Sears' THe Baby Book and it no longer felt right at all. At the time, I lived in a town home an i followed Dr Sears advice and she did the Babywise. She was miserable. Her baby woudl cry hour after hour and she was trying to hold out feeding him. I've never regretted my decision as we had such a happy, stress-free infant period.

BTW, I also have read in many places where the Babywise advice has been debunked as not research -based, and possibly not a good thing for either mother or child.

I tried Babywise with my first, and found it TOO restrictive, and honestly, it made me feel neglectful of my child, so we stopped. We used a modified Ferber method, which also worked with my 2 youngest. Anything there is a book about, you'll find people who love it, & people who hate it. You just need to do what you feel most comfortable with, and what your kids respond best to.

I love the entire GFI teachings. They have secular and religious versions that give a great foundation for structure and order. Babywise and toddler wise are great. They've (the Ezzos) gotten some bad reviews by brainless people who don't understand that a schedule is to serve you and help you, not to enslave you. I highly recommend it.

I used babywise with my daughter who was born 2 weeks early. It worked great for us. She was sleeping 8 hours straight by 8 weeks old. We were very strict on following the book. I know others who tried to compromise or just use bits and pieces of the book who did not have as much success at all. I have recommended Babywise to others who have also had alot of success with the method. I plan on definately using it with my future babies.

I must agree with Chandra. Babies cry because they need us. I know that many people strongly disagree with me, but babies cry for a reason. Letting them "cry it out" is abandonment. Being attentive is part of good parenting. The books by Harvey Karp and William Sears have helped me very much. If you tend to you baby now, it will really pay off for both of you.
Good luck.
A.

We use the Babywise methods on both our kids and they are GREAT!!! We highly recommend it!!! Good luck. We started with the method from day 1, and neither of our kids became high maintenance. Our daughter slept all night from 9 weeks of age, and our son from 12 weeks. We still adhere to schedules. It seems if they know the routine of the family, they know what to expect and makes things much easier.

I am a nurse practitioner and a mom of three. I have used the babywise technique with all my kids and requently suggest it to my patients and friends. All it is basically is setting a schedule so you and your child knows what is happening next. My babies were not really what I would consider fussy. It also makes sence for later in toddlerhood. I highly recommend the book. With all books you take what makes sence and feels good to you as a mother. Write back if you need more help!!!
C.

This was the BEST thing to come my way when I was pregnant with #2. I demand fed #1, and at 1 year/18 months, our bedtime routine went like this:

Rock him with a bottle, take bottle...rock again (because he woke up)...get out of rocker, keeping in constant motion...lay him in bed...pat him to sleep...duck down while patting him...duck out of sight...hope he doesn't hear you...crawl out of room...possibly repeat 2 or more times...FORGET IT!!!

Babies 2 and 3 went like this from day one: nurse and rock...put in crib awake...say "nite-nite"...leave room (upright, not crawling).

Baby is a welcome addition to the family, not the center of the family and they need a routine (schedule) to help them. What if we ate everytime we felt like it? Babies are BABIES! They need us to direct them. Incidently, my eldest has a real struggle with selfishness...I wonder why...hmmm...could it be that the world DID revolve around him when he was little and now there is a price to pay? Having done it both ways, I can tell you I wouldn't do it any other way. Our 2 younger ones are calmer, they sleep better and are more content.

There is a newer version of the Ezzo's book, called "Parent Controlled Feeding". It's an easier read, because they have clarified some of the controversial issues that so many have jumped all over. When I started reading "Parent Controlled Feeding", (BTW, I was AGAINST it and only agreed to read the book to please my husband, who was for it) I got about halfway through the first chapter and it just made SO MUCH SENSE, I had a complete change of mind. Hope this helps!

I used with both of children so far. My son was born 10 weeks early and was in the hospital for those 10 weeks so I started it after he came home. He also had BAD collick for the first 3 months home. It worked with him but took about 5 months to have him sleep through the night ( 7 am to 7 pm). My daughter was born a month early and I started when I brought her home at two days old. She was sleeping 8 hours at 8 weeks old and 7 am to 7 pm by 12 weeks old. It is hard to stick to the schedule by worth it - at least for me.

I read Babywise as well as the Ferber and Weissbluth books. My second child was extremely colicky, screaming from 5 pm until 2 am many nights. From each book, I took what I thought would work best for myself and my family. So I did kind of a modified version of all 3. This basically meant letting my son cry sometimes, but not for longer that 15 minutes, ever. I also stuck strictly to a schedule, putting him down at the same times every day and (with the exception of a short morning nap that I was trying to eliminate) always in his crib. By age 3 1/2 months, he was sleeping 12 hours each night, and taking one short morning nap (in the car seat) and a longer afternoon nap from 1 to 3 (when my older son was napping). You must use your instincts and do what works for you. One piece of advice someone gave me which I have stuck to with both kids is NEVER do anything with your kids that you are not prepared to repeat every day. (This is why I never let my kids sleep in my bed, nor did I ever lay down in their rooms). I think expectations are huge in creating well-adjusted kids, and I don't think it is fair to create an expectation that they can sleep with you and then take that away later. It makes it much harder for both of you. It can be done, but I think you need to be much more gentle once a pattern has already been established that you are trying to break. Good luck.

I have used it. It worked for my first great. He slept through the night at 7 weeks my daughter who is now 3 months, she has reflux and it just started working for her. She goes down not for her naps with little crying and even less crying at bed time. It took a while to find out how long she should play and then sleep, so I just put her down when she start crying.

Hi A.,

I am a survivor of a Major High Needs baby. I tried everything that I could think of with my little one...walking, talking, dancing, bouncers, swings, teas to help calm her down. Nothing worked until I got a baby book by Dr. Sears. wonderful Doctor who I now owe my life to. He says to buy a sling and put your baby in it when you wake up and live with them attached to you until bed time. With a few exceptions along the way. The baby is getting what it needs by being close to you and also your movements are simular to what the child felt in utero especially in the sling. These are the two most soothing things they say to a high needs baby. It ensures that those needs they are demanding are being met, without limiting you to literally sitting and holding them constantly. I tried this thinking it would not work, but I was desperate. I put my daughter in the sling at two months. With in a day she was a different child. More so than that, I could clean my house and fix my hair and relax some with her sudden change. I basically adopted the attachment parenting style, even though I thought is was a little strange at first, it worked. People now look at my daughter at 14 months and always comment on how secure and independent and melencolly she is.

I am not familure with Baby Wise, but this is what worked for my high needs baby.

I just did a little research on the baby wise and it is recommending that you allow your baby to cry. That is just WRONG!!!

A baby cries because it has needs that need to be met, EVEN in the middle of the night. All I can say is that I could never let my baby cry for any reason. Even when falling asleep. She might not need to nurse or be changed or anything like that, but she needs me or she would not cry. You as a mother are you childs source of security. Don't abandon them even if all they are asking for is you to just be there to comfort them.

I am sorry but I firmly believe that Ferber and all of the other people that say let them cry it out are out of touch with their hearts and are selfish un caring people.

S.

BabyWise was written by people with absolutely no training in early childhood development.

It has been associated with failure to thrive issues by many many pediatric medicine, psychology, child development experts.

Following schedules instead of your baby's cues is detrimental to your child's health. Infants do not manipulate. An infant's wants are its needs and you are building a basis of trust.

Yes, eventually your baby will stop crying if you don't respond because it will give up and stop communicating needs which can be very very dangerous.

Listen to your heart not the "babytrainers". You will build a healthy relationship with a child who will be confident and trusting. Listen to your baby.

Crying it out increases cortisol levels which are stress hormones. This can lead to problems with breathing, digestion, colic.

I recommend reading "The Fussy Baby Book : Parenting Your High-Need Child From Birth to Age Five" by William Sears