Baby Shower for a Second Baby?

This seems to be a regional/family thing that can vary greatly. In my family, there are never 2 showers for anyone for any reason. You get 1 bridal shower & 1 baby shower PER LIFETIME, lol. Seriously though, if you have 1 or 10 children, 1 baby shower. If you get married once, or 6 times, 1 bridal shower. No exceptions that I've ever seen.

I am not a fan of baby showers for a second baby unless there was a huge gap between kids or if the second pregnancy was twins.

It just seems greedy to me otherwise. Just my opinion, don't mean to offend.

I tend to balk at second showers. . .unless thery are crazy amount of years apart (six or more) or the twin thing. . .
For my second the girls in my office insisted on hosting a sip'n see.
It was fun just celebrating the baby with no gifts, no awkward games, etc. Just food, fun and friends. . .

A baby shower is for helping new parents who have "nothing" for a baby to get ready. It's not for second time parents that only have girl things to "get" stuff in the even of baby #2 being a boy.
Your friends and family will likely get the baby some gifts anyway.
If you host a meet the baby party--definitely provide food, snacks & beverages for all!

I say NO shower. The people who want to buy items for the new baby will.

It's considered pretty tacky where I live to have a shower after your first. If someone plans it for you and you are not asking for it, great, but otherwise, I would assume you will cover the expenses of subsequent babies.

I agree with the other posters who say every baby deserves to be celebrated. BUT, you sort of sound like you're planning your own shower. Is that the case? If so, I find that a bit strange. Why even worry about if a shower is appropriate or not? If your friends want to throw you a shower, they will. But you shouldn't be the one talking about it!! If nothing happens before the baby is born, I'd throw a little party when you're recovered (2 months later or whatever) and invite people to come over and meet the baby. Don't expect gifts. People will probably bring a little something. But expecting a shower so you can get diapers, wipes, etc? That's just plain weird.

Whether you call it a sprinkle, a sip n see or a baby shower...it's ALL the same thing!

I think second baby showers (including the above listed names) are tacky! A baby shower is held to help "NEW" never before parents. I declined all request to have a shower for our second child.

But it went unheard...my co-workers at work still put on a "sprinkle" for me. I was grateful, wrote my thank you cards, smiled and laughed but inside I felt like a liar! Cause I was!

Our first was a girl and our second was a boy...I didn't feel like I was starting off "new" because of the change in gender.

My husbands has a friend whose wife seriously gets pregnant at the drop of a hat...and I've been to three of her showers...makes me cringe each time. There was a request that because their older daughter was into pink that we don't buy pink for the new baby, we use purple because pink was already taken. SERIOUSLY? That is out of control...

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I don't think expecting a second shower, whether the baby is boy or girl, is appropriate. If someone offers, then great. But if you are expecting a shower, just so you can get "the necessities" then I think that is wrong. You should be able to provide what you need out of your own pocket. And just because you are having another baby, doesn't mean you should get another shower.

I think a lot of this depends on where you live. Around here you have one shower and that is it. There is no reason why you can't buy clothes for a second child, ya know? It would be akin to begging if you had a second shower. Well or people would assume you can't manage your money so you need help with things. All these assumptions are based on it not being normal to have a second shower around here unless there was a big enough gap between kids that it is reasonable you got rid of everything.

Apparently there are places where it is perfectly acceptable to have showers for every kid. There you would not get those assumptions.

So there you are...an unanswer. Sorry.

I didn't have a baby shower with my second, but I did have a "sprinkle". It was a smaller, more intimate, affair. No one seemed to have a problem except my MIL who thought it was terrible, but her friends whom whd refused to invite were offended that they were not invited. I am getting ready to have a third little bundle of joy and I would prefer not to have anything, but I feel my friends will again throw me a small sprinkle again. There are some things that you will always need. If people don't feel it is appropriate, then they will likely not attend.
Congratulations!

I think old school conventional wisdom says it's tacky to have more than one. I used to be in that group until someone pointed out to me that every baby deserves to be celebrated. Who can argue with that?? To that end, I threw a "sprinkle" for my SIL and labeled it as such on the invitation with cute wording that basically said, don't need the big stuff, just onesies, burp cloths, blankets, diapers, blah blah blah.

I've never known anyone to have a second baby shower. I have heard of people having them if they had a second many years later since most of the big stuff is pretty outdated by then. I have known people to have diaper parties for a second child where everyone brings a pack of diapers, different sizes.

I had a boy first, then a girl 2 years later and the only thing I really needed for her was clothing, but I got a ton of hand me downs from a friend with 2 girls. I could have kept my sons bedding because it was neutral, but I really wanted her to have a girly room so I bought new bedding. Everything else from my son was used for her, carseat, crib, swing, pack n play, bouncers, exersaucer.....I like the idea of having a meet the baby party, but you do what you think is right I'm sure you will get different opinions on this. Congrats!!

I have 4 girls and I've had 4 babyshowers. I think every baby deserves a babyshower ;) Congrats!!

Well, I would tend to think that that sort of thing is left up to your family and friends to decide. I would NEVER expect or assume that someone would/should throw me a shower for any baby. Yes I received 2 amazing showers for my first but I never asked for them and never would have and I am currently pregnant with my second (another girl in 6 weeks) and I am not having another shower for this one. But even if I was having a boy I would not have thought any differently about the situation. If someone in your close circle offers to throw you one then graciously accept but I wouldnt ask or expect another shower
Good Luck

Where I live, there is NO SECOND SHOWER. No, just no. Unless your kids are very far apart and you have a different family involved (remarriage), or are having multiples, it's tacky. And of course only if someone offers.

You should host a gathering afterward for people to meet the baby and those people will bring little gifts like clothes and diapers. In my family, we baptize as infants and throw a party and that's when everyone meets the baby. A shower literally says "bring me gifts because I need them." As a grown married woman, that's hardly the message you want to send, right?

A shower does not celebrate the baby...it provides gifts for an expectant couple who, in theory, could use some help preparing for all that comes with parenting.

I view the shower as a way to celebrate the new child. Every new child deserves to be celebrated! As for gifts, while you may have the necessities the child deserves to have things of it's own. Personal things that says someone cared. When I get baby shower gifts I always get necessities if they are needed and something personal like a dream catcher or something special that is just for that single child.
For our children we have also done things like "wish blankets" for each of the children at the shower and other things.
I really hate that people get so caught up saying that you are being selfish for having a shower for each child and that all you want are the presents. It's so wrong. And...even if you look at the gift aspect, every new child will need diapers, wipes, diaper cream, shampoo or what ever things like that. Things get recalled, or if you have children close in age you may still be using something for your first and need a second.
Have a shower, celebrate your new baby to be and poo poo to those who don't like it!

Every baby brings with it a ton of necessities. I have very loving and generous friends and family. For my first- a boy- I was thrown 5 showers. For my girl four years later, 3 showers (one was a surprise).I didn't ask for any of the showers, but I felt so loved and was very moved by all the attention.
There is no hard rule around second showers- usually it's just individual opinions. Some people think it's tacky- but they can just stay at home! Besides, you don't want that kind of negativity around you- you want well-wishes! I don't know anyone personally like that- here in the South, folks just love an excuse to get together and eat some food. lol

Im about to have my third...........baby and baby shower!, everybody likes to celebrate a baby!

That rule is almost as played out as "you must wear pantyhose" with a knee length skirt, or wearing white after labor day.

My friends basically insisted upon it, my second girl was 6 years later after my first and now im having a boy, so i guessi i fall into the category of necessity. I can honestly say though that even if i had had the same sex baby back to back i still would have wanted some sort of celebration, after all i do scrapbook it in their memory books for later.

of course you need to have another shower! if you dont thats just saying the second baby isnt as special! just do a diaper party or if the baby is the other sex ask for clothes and diapers :)

My sister had a "sprinkle" for her second child. People brought gifts of diaper and wipes, or an outfit. There weren't any big gifts, or expensive gestures. It was more of a get together with her friends to celebrate her baby. Small gifts, but very useful ones. They served snack food (think finger foods and punch), so there was nothing expensive. There were no games, or really decorations. Just friends and their children chatting and enjoying themselves.

Every baby deserves to have their own shower! Whether you "have everything you need" or not every baby is something to be celebrated!

Most people I know think second showers are tacky - except in the cases of big age differences, twins, etc. My SIL I think had one for each of hers - the second was 6 years behind the first and the third was a girl and everyone was way too excited about it being a girl to not have a shower.

Other than SIL, I've known two people to have second baby showers and both were really poorly attended. People just don't make it a priority.

It also possibly depends on your what your family and friends deem appropriate and possibly on your geographical location.

I like the idea of a party after to show baby off, but depending on your delivery and fears about immunity/illness, it could be difficult to coordinate.

I have 2 boys, 3 1/2 years apart. I was given four (!) showers when I was pregnant with my first son--though there was no overlap between the guest lists and people were generous to a level I couldn't believe.
I was the last of my group of friends to have baby number 2, and they all had small showers (given for them by the rest of the group) for the second baby because in every case baby 2 was not the same sex as baby 1. I declined a shower when I found out I was having another boy, it just seemed tacky. Many people gave the new baby gifts anyway, but a shower is truly a gift-giving party--people are invited to "shower" the guest of honor with gifts, and especially since everyone had been so generous the first time, I didn't feel right accepting a second shower.
I agree that each baby is special and deserves to be celebrated, but a shower is really only for the first. I feel the same way about wedding showers, you get showered for the first marriage, after that you are on your own. Anyway, have a party after the new baby, but not a shower. And incidentally, one never throws a shower for oneself. Miss Manners would have a fit :)

In my area/life its uncommon to have a second baby shower even if its a different sex. But the more I am on these types of forums I realize its different in other areas/families.

So I guess, you do what is common or what your used to.

If friends of yours want to give you a shower let them : ) A friend of mine agreed to one if the invitations specified diapers or gift cards to Target, as she already had things like you and could then get new things as needed. Everyone liked the idea and several other friends have since done the same thing. Some people may think it tacky, but if it works for the new parents, that's what's important.

Personally, I think that every baby should be celebrated in some way. I would not expect a 2nd shower, but would be grateful if anyone thought of me with a new baby coming. There are ALWAYS things that are needed for a new baby...diapers, wipes, bibs, onsies etc... Some things get trashed with the first baby and can't be used again.

I had a boy and then had a girl 2 years later. I did re-use a lot of stuff. I was kind of hurt that some people seemed to have the attitude that they bought be a baby gift with the first one...therefore my daughter would not get anything. I never told anyone of my hurt and just thanked those people profusely who actually thought of my little girl....

Unless everything you have for a new born is pink (and you were having a boy), I think another shower is not appropriate. For the second baby it is most likely that family and close friends will send a gift without a shower.

Blessings....

I've been to different types of situations....

-My friend was having her 2nd girl, and her mom threw her a "clothing" luncheon..Everyone just brought clothes...
- Another friend, had a boy first, then was pregnant with a girl (4 years later), she was given a "laid back" baby shower, but still DID register because it was a different sex....
Go with your gut!!!

If your youngest was like 8 yo yes, 17 months no. To me very tacky. Sorry
but that is how I feel. Yes every baby is special, but two showers so close
together. It gets to be too much. You should not need anything but some
boy clothes if it is a boy. I would hope that you would be able to buy a few
outfits yourself.

If you have a girl and then a boy close together maybe a "sprinkle" which is
just people getting together. No real gifts. Maybe an outfit, bibs, but gifts
really should not be expected.

I see a shower as a celebration and not so much about gifts. If someone wants to host a gathering for a second baby, I don't see why it's so wrong unless you go registering for expensive gifts or something.
My kids are 10 years apart and different sexes so having a first shower really had no bearing on my second child whatsoever.

I do think it's weird to have a shower with the intention of getting gifts or necessities though. We provided everything our kids needed and of course people bought little outfits, made bibs, etc. We didn't have "gatherings" because we needed anything.
I was in the hospital for most of my second pregnancy so we had a gathering after I got home and all was well. It was a celebration of a healthy baby and all the friends who supported us through a tough time. We wanted to be the ones giving in that instance.

You're not pregnant yet, so it seems early to worry about it, but opinions definitely vary on subsequent showers.

Best wishes!

I didn't have a shower for my second. I had both boys. But now that I am pregnant with my third, (a girl) I have about 3 different people wanting to throw me a shower together, saying I finally deserve a girly party. Also, most of my baby stuff has been given away since my last child was almost 5 years ago and I obviously have zero girl items.

So, is it tacky? If others are doing it for you and excited about celebrating it, then no. If you are asking for one, then most likely yes. It really depends on the situation.

Usually around here, we have a 'meet the baby' for 2nd/3rd/4th... babies. It's not a baby shower, but a special little party for after the baby is born where people can bring gifts (usually diapers/wipes) and snack and decorate and all that.

A baby shower for a second, or third, or tenth baby is fine... as long as someone comes to you wanting to throw one. A baby shower should never be expected or anticipated, even for the first. It is a gift to you, not a right. Just go with it, whatever happens. Don't be hurt if nobody offers to do one, and don't expect anyone to throw one for you. If you are approached about having one, in that someone wants to do it and lets you know that, then be gracious and thankful. If you have a boy or girl, this is my advice.
BTW, I have six children and have been blessed with showers for all of them. I have very generous friends.

Where I'm from there are no second showers. That being said, I'm pregnant with twin boys and have a daughter. I didn't ask for a shower, but I have had 2 friends and my husband's co-workers have offered to have a shower, so we are having a shower, and I have family members in my home town who suggested having a shower. This is what I told everyone, I'm not going to turn down a shower, but I don't expect one either. If your friends or family is willing to throw a shower, accept the generous offer. I suggested something very low key. Since I'm on bedrest, we can't do the shower until after the babies are born, so we are having a meet the babies party.

I think it is reasonable to have another shower. To me it is a celebration of your next baby's birth. Your dear friends and family want to celebrate with you. Even if you have another girl there is always something new or baby items you do not have already. I did not get every baby item out there that's for sure! Plus there are jammies that say "little sister" or your friends could all chip in to get you a double stroller if that is something you would use. We did this for one of my friends when she had her 2nd (she had 2 girls). To me it's just a fun celebration and a time to be with your close friends. It's not about the gifts although everyone loves those cute little baby outfits!

I had a shower for my second but it was because it way my husband's first biological child (he did adopt my oldest) and it had also been five years since I had a baby and I didn't have much from my first left except clothing.

For our third we did a meet the baby party after he was born.

my first was a boy and 11 months later my daughter was born. I had a shower for both because they were different genders but we decided early that if we had another biy we would not do a second shower. I like the idea of the meet the baby party after the fact if it is another girl.

So intersting that you just posted this becuase I was just wondering the same thing. I am pregnant with my second boy and I totally feel like no one really cares at all about this pregnancy (except immediate family of course). Another woman in my office just had a baby in December and she got a big baby shower and I overheard some coworkers talking today about would there be a shower for me, and someone right away said "no its her second and you only get one". That shut everyone up fast. So the people that want to celebrate are overruled by the the ones who feel its "tacky" or whatever. It really hurt my feelings to be dismissed so quickly. I think every baby is special and cause for celebration. Except for having saved clothing, we are at no specific advantage than any brand new parents, and on top of that I feel very sad that no one feels that my second baby is special enough to celebrate. So for those that think its tacky and greedy to celebrate a friends or family members second baby - I think your mean attitude is tacky and greedy. Its judgemental people like you that make everyone else scared to plan what should be a joyful celebration and sign of unity and love and friendship. A. - I hope someone throws you a second shower. If they offer, accept it and enjoy!

IDK my family thought it was crazy that I wanted to have a baby shower for my second - even though my kids were 5 years apart and I had given away all my baby stuff except the crib!

however - my friends all thought I should definitely have another baby shower and hosted one for me.

I don't think in this case since your kiddos are so close together its a necessity but that doesn't mean it wouldn't be nice - every baby deserves a shower!

either way, you're not throwing your own shower, so just sit back and see if a girlfriend offers to throw you one - then graciously and excitedly accept :) my group of girlfriends feels that EVERY baby should be celebrated equally, and we throw showers during each pregnancy - likewise, my husband's clinic throws a shower for each baby expected by employees(even the men!). i have never felt offended or put off when receiving an invitation to a person's 2nd, 3rd, or 4th child - i get excited for that person, that they are fortunate enough to have conceived a child and carried it, and bonus, i get to shop for BABY things - yay! we had our third child about 3 years ago, i did request that my husband's work shower be a "diaper" shower, i had gone hog wild during that pregnancy as it was my first and only girl, knew it was gonna be my last baby - and had already got all the bedding and a TON of clothes - i had put off buying diapers/wipes/shampoo/soaps/etc for that reason - i seriously STILL have aveeno lotion from that shower! the after baby showers are gaining popularity, but i'm one of those moms that doesn't want 20 people touching my baby all at once lol! good luck with ttc your next one :)

Absolutely not! You help the first time mother out, as a kind gesture
and after that...you are responsible. Just like a bridal shower, you don't get one each time you get married! THank goodness with the re-marriage rates these days. Your friends and family are not to "provide" you with the necessities...if you cannot affford them, try birth control.

I admit I am a firm believer in one baby shower per person. Just my preference!

It is highly likely that many people won't come. We had a baby shower for a poorer sister at church, she had 5 boys and her husband worked in the produce department at Walmart...she was finally having her girl. She was a sweet sweet lady that everyone liked.

She helped us get the invitations out, she gave us a list of some of her non church friends, we had it in a home so it would be more family like...only one person showed up.

When we asked some of the people why they didn't come we were told everything from it was a tacky idea to have a baby shower for someone who already had children to "they got pregnant on purpose, couldn't they afford to pay for that babies care".

People just really don't attend showers except for a first baby. I do think you should go ahead though. Even if only one person shows up that is one less thing you'll have to buy.

Nope, you only get one baby shower and that is for the first child. A baby shower is intended to get you started on the basics of babies. Of course if you have the opposite gender the second time, many friends and family will buy clothing and other gender specific items for you.

I have been to showers where there is many years between children (10 years I remember for one) and they were in fact starting over.

Plan on being able to handle the basics of your second yourself.

I had my first son in 2009 and then this past oct i delivered my second son. i was on the fence about having a baby shower only because i was being guilted in to thinking i didn't NEED one by my unsupportive mother. Well i completely regret my decision to allow her to brain wash me. A baby show is more than a chance to get free stuff, its an opportunity for you as a mother to be dotted on by someone other than you hubby. just ask for gender neutral items and gift receipts if you don't plan on finding out the sex till birth! DON'T HESITATE HAVE THE BABY SHOWER!

I'm with the "no second showers" camp. The first shower is for the young family just starting out, needing ALL the stuff that goes with having a baby. It's a helping hand from the community in support of the new family. It's nice to get all new stuff for the first baby. My feeling is that by the time you choose to bring a second baby into the home, you should be a little more established and not in need of the helping hand. I did read your update, and I can see you agree.

However, this question has been asked so many times because a lot of people are getting pregnant for the second, third, fourth, etc time without having the resources they need to support their baby-making habit...