My dad remarried after my mother passed away had twins, a girl and a boy who are now 6 yrs old. June is their birthday. I have a 7 yr old daughter whose birthday is in Aug. The twins are currently in 1st grade. Mine is in second. The twins teachers have said they need to redo 1st grade. The boy can not write well and can not read more than the basic 3 letter words. The girl can write fine and read. She is an average student but not an A student. The boy is failing everything. He has trouble consentrating and is not learning things. He's also had speach problems. My daughter plays with them and the girl seems perfectly normal for her age. The boy is a little odd. He draws in the air. He has a habit of pulling on his lip. He also flicks his cheek over and over again. He seems to be able to socialize like a normal kid. My dad and his wife have not told kids they will be doing 1st grade again, which i think they should. My dad thinks they are not socially ready and says they are smaller than rest of kids and they both need to be held back. I think the boy needs to be, but just becasue they are twins i dont think the girl should be held back if she is an average student. To me they are of average size. And size has nothing to do with their brains. My dad and his wife dont work with the kids and take them out of school for vactions without even thinking twice about it. I think they need to have boy evaluated for a learning diability, but dont know how to tell them without offending them. His wife babies him to death and gets offended when i say anything abou the way she should do things.
I would let my dad and step-mom handle it . . . if they ask my opinion I would give it (i.e., that it might be helpful to have him evaluated).
I would not let my dad triangulate me into the situation.
JMO.
It sounds like your brother falls into the autisim spectrum. Look up some stuff online and see if you can get your dad and step-mom to read it. The school probably cannot discuss this with you because schools have gotten as confidential as a doctor's office. Hopefully they will get him help. Tell them that both Bill Gates and Donald Trump have Aspbergers and many notable people have had dyslexia including Leanardo Di Vinci and Albert Einstein, Tom Cruise, Henry Winkler, Jay Leno and Whoppi Goldberg.
They are not stupid however their brains process information differently.
It sounds like the boy should be evaluated for sure. Maybe talk to your Dad without his wife around so you get his feelings on it. There are a lot of learning disabilities out there. He could have one of them. Not sure about the Asbergers as that is a social disorder and you say he is social. My oldest has Asbergers Syndrome along with Sensory Integration Disorder. He wants to play with other kids and has a problem with playing together with them and not going off by himself to play his game. Anyhow, I do not think you should tell them what to do, just let them know what you have noticed of his behaviors. You have to let them decide whether or not they will get him help or not. I know it is hard, and they need to be the one to make the decisions on what they do with their children.
D. P.
This boy may have a learning disability, or aspergers, but none of us can diagnose this here on this site. The only way to be sure is to have a competent psychologist do a full evaluation.
This is the difficult part - staying out of it, mostly. These childrens' parents are the ones responsible for making decisions about their care and their education. Unless they are being abused or obviously neglected, at which time they would need to be reported to the appropriate authorities, you are a caring relative but not their parents. Sure, you can ask some questions, or make some suggestions, or express your concern, but that's about it.
The teacher should be on top of this already, and doing their own testing. My sons school did NOT catch it, but we felt something was different. He went through 15 hours of testing with a psychologist. She did numerous tests to be sure it was thorough. Problem is parents have to be willing to accept it otherwise they won't initiate testing. The spectrum disorders are different for each person. It is extremely painful to admit your child is different from others and some just won't accept it. It's a hard subject to approach, but do more research, maybe you can talk to his teacher?! Good luck.
There's something definitely going on with the boy but can't say for sure that it would be autism. (With Asperger's, children tend to talk in full sentences very early on, before typical children do.) Since your father and stepmom will not talk to you about their children's development, I wonder if there is a way to speak with their teacher about possibly having your stepbrother assessed through the school district for special ed services. Hopefully the suggestion would be better received if it is coming from their teacher.
I don't think you should be telling his wife how to do things, would you like it if she told you how to do things? It sounds like they started kindergarten too early and should've waited a year. I think you need to keep your opinions to yourself, but if you are truley concerned, then you should work with the boy in a matter to where it doesn't look like you are interfering with their parenting.
i think hes got more than a ld going on. my oldest was ld and didnt do what you describe. my youngest is slow on speech and doesnt do what you describe. as for aspergers or autism I dont know anything about them. you telling the wife to do this and that comes out as your telling her she is inadequate wether you mean it or not. the only one I would listen to on my oldest was my dad. with my youngest been there done that its obvious to me where he lacks and how bad I dont need to be told.
Dear mom, I would tink that if the school though there was something wrong with the boy, they would have brought it up to the parents and possibly recommend a special needs classroom/school not just the repeat of first grade
Talk to your father about it, it sounds like you and the mother don't have the best relationship so I wouldn't confront her about it directly. Start by telling your dad that you want the best for your little brother and sister, but that you have noticed some things that concern you regarding your brother. The earlier a disability/disorder is discovered, the easier it is to treat and correct the problems associated with it. Online there are tests to help you determine if it is Autsim or Aspergers. They ask a range of questions on physical abilities, mental abilties, milestones, etc. The answers you provide will determine if the child fits into that disability/disorder. Maybe you could go online and get some of these tests and see if you can answer the questions about your brother. If you can't answer all of the questions without the assistance of his mother or father, then ask your dad if he can help you answer them. Or, just give the whole test to your dad to answer himself, if he is willing. When you get the results of the tests, if it shows he could have Autism or Aspergers, go online and read about it. Print out information for your father to read about it. Tell him that the earlier intervention is done, the more likely your brother is to be successful. I would also suggest your father ask the school about testing your brother. It sounds like it may be too late to save 1st grade for him, but if he tests at a level that the school deems him in need of assistance, he can get an IEP (Individualized Education Plan required by law), and he can get help in the resource room to help him be at grade level, or they could allow him extra time to get stuff done and provide him with the necessary help to be successful in school. The IEP sets goals and provides steps the student as well as the teacher will take to meet these goals.
