Attempted Suicide -- What Now?

I've been there. If you haven't, then you don't really get it. I don't say that to be mean, it's just the mindset. The ONE thing that helped me the most was being around people that had gone through nearly exactly what I did.

The best thing you can do is let him know you love him and you're there to listen if he needs to talk. He may or may not take you up on that offer, but just having the knowledge that SOMEONE loves you helps. He's got a long road ahead of him. Having loving, supportive people around him that don't push him to talk about what he's not ready to talk about is about the best you can give him right now.

Eventually, in months or years, he'll be ready to talk about it without feeling the emotions that were attached to the event quite so strongly.

I had to go visit my sister at a facility after one of her suicide attempts. I would not bring anything now, just ask the nurses/care providers about what is allowed.
I could not bring flowers to her as she might try to poison herself.
I could not bring a spiral notebook as she might use the wire to hurt herself. Etc etc.

Just bring hugs. Be emotionally prepared to be very overwhelmed-- there are a lot of very hurting people you might see/be in contact with. I visited her three times while she was in the facility. She wanted to talk, so I listened. She was angry and wanted to blame one person in her life, then the other, and I stayed silent. I was there just to be present, not to be a therapist.

Your friend may be angry that their suicide attempt failed. Your friend may be outwardly angry at others instead of being able to focus on their own part in how their life got to where it is. This is a time that I would not even suggest 'reflective' listening, but just being present, nodding, 'hmmmm'... as responses. Your friend may be angry or explosive or really sad. He's going to have to figure out, over the time he is in care, how he wants to address his depression. Right now, life is hurting so very much. If you make any statements, just try to be genuine and own them. Instead of reassuring 'hang in there, you'll get better' you can say "Wow, I would have been so sad if you were gone from my life".... something he cannot argue with. I would also leave out any "it was God's plan for you to still be alive" type of reassurances out of it. The guy likely feels like there is NO game plan for the future and is going to need a lot of support to just get to that point of putting one foot in front of the other on a day by day basis.

Lastly, give yourself some time to process this later today. Allow yourself to cry or grieve or feel bad for a while, and do take care of yourself. I found those visits to be emotionally draining and rather devastating sometimes. I wasn't in a place to go do something fun or be bright and cheery for others later on. You can ask him what he needs, before you go, and then be sure to check with the nurses or helpers if those items are allowed before bringing them.

Hugs. Sorry.

just bring yourself and be there for him, not just today, but every day he needs you. ((hugs))

Blesses Be

Act like he's just in there for any old procedure. Do not prompt him to talk about anything going on with his mental health. He's going to be embarrassed because you know he was that bad off already.

He's going to want to feel as normal as possible. Not like a poor mentally ill person who's lost it so bad he can't cope anymore.

That's how he's probably feeling inside. So making him feel normal is what you need to do. So, unless he brings it up do not mention the fact that he's in a mental ward, that he's under a suicide watch, and that he's failed at admitting he needed help years ago and could have been under a doc's care to have meds to fix this.

It's likely he has a chemical imbalance. He is not at fault for having that medical problem. He is responsible for not getting the right meds and seeking help to get better. Even if he was taking antidepressants he wasn't on the right ones or he wasn't taking enough of the one he was on.

So please, just hang out and visit with him. Once you get over the curiousness of what the "inside" looks like and what everyone in there is like it will be okay.

so sorry to hear this. so sad when a person feels the only way out is suicide. my heart goes out to those suffering from a mental illness. if it were me, i would bring maybe some word search, crossword puzzles and candy. (if he can eat candy).
Ask him how he is feeling and then let him know that if he needs anything to let you know (even though he probably wouldnt). There really isnt much to say. I would leave it up to professionals to help him with his illness, just be there as a friend. good luck!

I say just go and visit. Brace yourself as well depending on what he did he may be hooked up to many different machines. Maybe if you can get him a very soft warm blanket slippers and flannel pajama pants. He may be in the hospital for a while to get the help he needs. Also maybe a notebook and pen for him to write. It may help get things out

I'm sorry to hear this. It's terrible when someone feels so much pain that they want to end their life to stop it.

Validate his reasons for wanting to end his life, and help him identify what's worth living for. Listen to him and don't judge. Encourage him to continue to seek help and treatment.

Also, don't bring anything in for him without getting it approved by the hospital staff.

I went through this a few years ago with a dearest family member. Luckily, he came to me before any attempts were made, shared his plan with me and we were able to get him admitted before he harmed himself.

What is hard to understand for a person who hasn't walked this road is that this kind of thinking involves the person convincing themselves that the world would be a better place without them and that their loved ones would also be better off if they weren't around.

Tell him how valuable he is to you and how he brings value into your life. Don't make it about you but do try to illustrate in very real terms why he is important to you and to anyone else you may have in common. Remind him that he's not alone and you are an ear and a shoulder at any time.

I will say a prayer for his recovery, he's in the right place and now can start to really get the help he needs. My loved one has been treated successfully for 3 years and is healthier now than he ever was before.

thoughts to you and him. S.