At What Age Is It Not Appropriate to Have Boy and Girl Sleepovers?

I agree about supervision. I feel that way about any sleepovers and extended visits, actually, if kids have access to computers and phones and internet.

Our town, and many surrounding towns, have chapters of Venture Crew, which is a coed leadership and adventure group for high school students. They go skiing and camping and hiking and sailing - day trips, weekends, and 1 week excursions. Men and women chaperones go along and are in the same tents and bunks. It works great.

If you and your husband or other adult chaperones of both genders are sleeping in the same room, it's fine at any age. Be sure the other parents know.

But I'd be surprised if kids want to do this past a certain age. Once kids are prepubescent, I think there are privacy issues that are hard to manage. Bathroom privacy is one, girls getting periods at the worst possible moment is another. Lots o consider.

It's worth noting that trying to prevent sexual activity is not just based on 2 genders. Gay and bisexual kids can have contact and experiment in all-boy or all-girl parties, so let's be realistic.

We have never had a situation like this come up, so I can't really comment. Our kids have never been asked to, and never wanted to. It never came up during my childhood either.

However, I remember being at sleepovers as a kid and there being brothers (and sometimes their friends) which would be similar I suppose. I don't think they slept in the same area, but were certainly around watching movies until late.

My feeling is, if you're asking, then it's generally a sign that you're not comfortable.

Definitely not at 12.

It really depends on supervision. I would be fine with a co-ed sleepover here but I might feel uncomfortable if I was not sure about what kind of supervision the kids would have. My older son's last co-ed sleep over he was 8 but he has just never asked again. I guess my 13 year old sort of still does have them since his best friend has a twin sister, but I am not concerned about it in the least.

I would not ever be comfortable with a co-ed sleepover.

I'm normally pretty conservative about this kind of thing but my oldest son was very good friends with some girls when he was in elementary school. One of the girls was an only child with wonderful parents and a great extended family. The dad loved having a boy around to do "guy stuff" with and my son has always been lacking in father figures so the entire family relationship was beneficial. He went on several overnight trips with the family to a cabin in the mountains until maybe age 13 or thereabouts. The girl ended up becoming closer friends with my step-daughter (same age) in middle school so their friendship kind of tapered off but it was good while it lasted.

It really depends on the situation. I think that any tween/teen sleepovers need to be monitored by parents and if you know anyone is "dating" in the social circle, that's a hard no (I had a situation in high school where my boyfriend and I were friends with a set of siblings and before we dated, we used to sometimes both sleep over on the same night - my friend's wise mom put a stop to that once we started dating). I was allowed to attend some overnight co-ed post-homecoming or post-prom parties in high school, but the parents were up all night and around. I allowed my kids to do the same thing when they were seniors. I was also allowed to do a co-ed overnight at a beach house later in high school, with the understanding that the boys slept upstairs in a bedroom next to the parents and the girls slept downstairs.

I think if there's a special situation where a late night or early morning activity or distance make an overnight stay sensible, it can be fine with appropriate rules and supervision. And lifelong friends who are like family can be an exception but again, with appropriate sleeping arrangements like any other house guest. I wouldn't make it a habit though, or suddenly become the house where this is cool.

Why does it have to be a sleep over?
Everyone come over for a few hours and then everyone go home.
12 isn't 8 yrs old anymore and most if not all of them are in puberty by 12.
At any age I wouldn't allow a coed sleep over but if you've done them in the past then I'd say anyone over 8 yrs old is too old for it.

There are some wonderful things about growing up but we put kid stuff aside as we age.

uh, never beyond 5.

Why do people have to sleepover to have a good time? Honestly, I think the whole idea of a sleepover is ridiculous anyways.

I'm a firm believer that nothing good happens after midnight. Or at least nothing that you can't do during the daytime.

i had them from kindergarten until my boys went to college.
khairete
S.