At What Age Does a Child Understand Putting His Toys/books Away?

My daughter is 20 months old and just in the last month is really helping to put things away when I say clean up time. I have always tried to make it fun, but now she gets it.
One thing I have done since she was around 12 months is give her one toy at a time and walk over to the shelf with her or bring the bucket to her to help put it away and make a big deal that she is such a good helper. As long as you keep trying you he won't become spoiled so to speak and think mommy does it all:-)

Hi A.~
My boys usually watched me put things away and would only occasionally help out. After my son started preschool, his teacher taught me the clean up song ("Clean up, clean up, everybody, everywhere! Clean up, clean up, everybody do their share.) it got much easier. I would announce time to clean up and we'd start to sing and they were quick to help out and do their share. My daugter, on the otherhand, just did it without prompting. If I started to clean up, she would help me. But as I was throwing things out, I asked her to help me and she picked up the handset of my cordless phone and tossed it in the trash, too. I took it as a lesson I needed to learn, watch what you ask her to throw away as you may need it afterwards.
That same girl also knew all the letters before she was 1 yr and could recognize them and tell you what they were by about 15 months. I am very proud of her as she is now in kingergarten and doing very well.
Best of luck to you...
J.~

Hi A.,

My son is 22 months & he really understands & does pick up after himself when told. He will even bring us the phone & tv remote once we ask him. We may have to say to him a few times but he definitely understands the concept.

So right now you I think he is a little to young but start working with him & making it fun & games with a song & maybe he will begin to follow along.

Good luck

Hi A.,
A couple of months ago my daughter learned a little song at school "Clean up, clean up, everybody do your share"...sung in her monotone minnie mouse voice :-).

She does battle me and there are times I just do it (I know bad) but when we do it along with the song, she's more apt to join in the cleaning up. Another thing (your little one might still be too little but to keep in mind) when she's done with dinner she has to bring her plate to me at the sink. We also found a low drawer to put her forks, spoons and bowls in and when I empty the dishwasher she puts her stuff in her drawer.

Also we've started calling her our "big helper" and say what a great job she's doing becoming a "big kid" when she does things like pick-up her toys/clothes/etc. She gets a kick out of it.

Hope this helps!
Kristal

I started asking both of my kids to "help" put away the toys and books around 18 months old. At that age they respond pretty well if you make a game of it. They don't have much of an attention span though, so don't expect to be "helped" for very long. That's okay. Just exposing your little one to cleaning up as part of the routine will help him develop the right habits. By the time my daughter was two or so she really loved being a helper. Now that she's 5, she's pretty good at cleaning up although like most kids she has to be told to get started :) I found that keeping toys in open stacking bins and books in baskets instead of on bookshelves made it much easier for my little ones to sort and put things away.

I would start putting them in his hand and telling him or directing him where they go. even if they are not perfect.. he will begin to get the idea. He is not too young to help pick them up. Or if he likes putting things in a bigger thing.. get a small tote that he can put them into. We bought a blue tote from Walmart that is a cube with handles and a cover that has a circlular hole in the top for my daughter.. and made a game of picking legos up and putting them in the hole. Now it holds all her LeapFrog items in it.

If you make a game of it.. he will want to "play" So sing a little song.. we have one that goes.. pick up, pick up, eveybody pick up...and we add different words to it depending on what we are picking up.. Its something we made up.. and the kids, especially my 6 year old still sings it sometimes...

Its just something we started with the kids were young.. we made it fun and sang and played the pick up game.

It helped with mine... Hope it does with yours.

Hope that helps some.

W. in Watkins Glen
Mom to 3 kids
Korey-Mikel 16, Whitney 13 and Andrea 6

I say start early and don't underestimate just how smart your kids are. I started this around that age with my daughter. It took patience and a lot of time redirecting her attention to the task. Now she picks up almost all her toys at night at age 2.

He won't do it "on command" for probably another year, but he is definitely capable of doing it. You just have to make a game of it. Make up a song to sing as you're doing it, or make exaggerated movements and noises when you're doing it, or make it a race, etc. Don't expect him to put them back properly or in any order, but it is definitely not too early to start teaching him it's a good to do. My daughter started taking a gym class at 13 months, and the teacher made cleaning up just another "fun" activity in the class, and my daughter loved chasing after the balls and throwing them back in the bucket.

My daughter was able to understand putting things away at around 15 months or so, but most of that was because of the classes that she was in (music & gym) and they did clean up at least three times each class with different things. The repetition and a couple of months and then she understood. But it is still a very slow process and I do end up doing the bulk of it :)

One thing that has helped us translate that to home is the songs that they sing along with the cleanup process. Here are the words - you can probably find a good tune if you like.

Clean up, clean up everybody, everywhere
Clean up, clean up everybody do their share.

Hope that helps - good luck!

He can start learning it as a game - but yes, you are going to do the majority of cleaning for a while yet. Books on a shelf are hard for little ones to put back - but my girls (and one I babysat) all went through a "let's pull out all the books" stage. I got a few bins for books to go in on the bookshelves which helped them put them away (and they could just take down a bin rather than clear the whole shelf sometimes). Bins for toys also work better for us than shelves or drawers.
As your child gets older, remember how overwhelming the mess can seem - to you and him. Clean one category at a time - books, trucks, dress up, etc.

Both of my children responded to games for clean up ... either we'd sing a 'clean up song' or have a contest. Before they were talking, I'd sing and eventually they each joined me ... but always cleaning. As they got older, we used it as a chance to work on words (identify what you'd pick up) and eventually to count. We still do cleanups this way with my 6yo sometimes. Keep in mind though, you'll always do more ... but that's ok since they are helping.

Good luck.

My son will be 3 in March and he just started helping pick up his toys - until recently he was NOT cooperative at all and would do just as you described - watch me put them away or pull other toys out as I picked them up. It was very frustrating - there is a light at the end of the tunnel though! I can't get him to focus long enough to clean them ALL up but I can focus on certain areas ("pick up the cars" or "put away the books") - the rest I do when he's sleeping. He just started in a two-year-old program this year and I think that's making a HUGE difference in his cooperation! Start small with low expectations and before you know it he'll catch on! Repetition is key!

Watching you will teach your child where the books are supposed to go and he may start helping at some point. My one year old girl is exploring everything now as well - it is certainly a messy and chaotic stage - but also so much fun. By the time a child turns two you can expect a little more cooperation, but I don't think you can expect him to start putting things away when he is done with them until he is probably 3 . . .especially a boy!

We absolutely sing the clean up song but instead of singing everybody do their share I insert my child's name(and if you have more than one I add a different kid each round)...but really what works best for us is limiting how much is availible to the kids...we rotate toys and books...so I'm not stuck reading the same thing and they aren't stuck playing with the same toys(yes there are favs that are always out)one week it's legos/blocks...the next trains and cars...the next resuce heros...and so on...and I really rotate them as they get tired of them it could be a week or 4 weeks...I just noticed that when my lil ones had everything at their fingertips they would get everything out and play with nothing and clean up was overwhelming(for all of us)...now they always have to ask for a puzzle/game and they only get another when they've returned the first...same with books...they're old enough to get this at 1yr if that's how you present it...it's just the way we do things and that's all they know.

Hi A.,

I had to laugh when I read your question as I too have often wondered this and here's my take on it. My daughter is 2, and we have had bouts of her putting things away very nicely (only to throw them back on the floor) etc. Until recently, it didn't "click", which I think is totally normal. Over the past year, we have had a battle of wills (if you will), sometimes she cleaned up, sometimes I did, and how I didn't lose my mind was we did it together (taking turns i.e., by saying "mommy's turn", and then "Skylar's turn" each of us picking one item up. That seemed to work the best (but it takes some time for them to grasp it). The other thing that also helped is the "clean up song" "Clean up, Clean up, now it's time to clean up" (all the while you are picking up the books or whatever else you want them to help with. Keep singing until everything is away and then remove your child from what you just cleaned up (so it doesn't end up on the floor again. Good luck, M.

Dear A.,

I agree with many of the moms who have responded -- a child your son's age should be able to put things back if you make it fun (don't expect him to do it on his own, though -- you'll probably have to stay very involved for a while). The one thing that stuck out for me as problematic, though, was the word "shelf." My son is 2, and he's a great "putter-awayer," but he's still not coordinated enough to reshelve books. Instead, for every one book that gets put back, six wind up on the floor, then gravity gets interesting, and we've got an avalanche on our hands ;). What I recommend instead is that you get a few big "everything bins." Target has some nice-looking ones. An active one-year-old will probably love throwing all toys and books, indiscriminately, into a bin. While you will have to sort them out later, you'll be helping him build the skill of putting things back (and probably also the skill of basketball!).

Best of luck,

Mira

A.,

At 1 he's too young to put them back in place, but you doing it shows him that they don't stay there. I started my son on cleaning up his toys when he was about 2, starting with very simple things (and I was doing most of the work), and progressively he did it on his own. Making it a game is what works best: how many toys in a certain time can he put away; Mommy one, baby one, etc. Also, he'll be able to put away toys before books, since books are a little trickier.

K.

At 1 year old he is still a little young yet, but you can start him on the right path. When you're putting the books back on the shelves, hand him one, then tell him to put it on the shelf, too. You may have to take his hand and help him. Once he does it "by himself", get all excited! Praise him, clap your hands, etc. Before long you will find him picking them up off the floor and helping you on his own. He won't get them in the right place at first, but they will be on the shelf and that's all that counts for now. And always praise and get excited when he does something like this. Sometimes it even helps to bring daddy in on it. When daddy gets home you can say something like "_______(insert name here) helped me put the books away today!". Be sure daddy gets excited and praises him, too.