Any Foster/adoptive Moms Out There?

Hi K., I am a foster/adopt mom. Maybe try using choices and only positive words. If you say "no", or "don't" his first instinct will be to run, it is a game for him. Try to say, "when you come back by mommy, we can go to A or B. " Let him know that he has rewards for behaving when you go out. Talk to him on the car ride to your destination about where you are going, what you need to do, and what he needs to do. Make sure that you keep it simple, he is young, but he understands. Tell him that it is his job to hold your hand, or stay in the cart. That way he knows what is expected of him. Then tell him what his rewards will be if he behaves. Perhaps extra time with mommy reading his fave book, or bubbles in the bathtub. Use the reward as a reminder while you are out and praise him ALOT when he is being good. Hope this helps.
G.

i know this is something that may be a little harsh, but i tell my little ones exactly what might happen (worst case scenario) if they run away from me or into the street. i tell them they could get hit by a car and die or get very badly hurt. i tell them that a stranger (or even someone they know) could pick them up and take them away from me forever. and i tell them how sad that would make me and everyone else. they understand that and dont want those things to happen so they make the choice to stay close by.

also when i was 8 months pregnant and christmas shopping alone with my five and two year olds, i used a leash. i just put my hand up to those idiots who would remark about how it was cruel. "excuse me?" i would say, "its better than my child running into the busy holiday traffic, mister!" i was not about to run after my child since i gained 60 pounds in five months!!!

my 20 month old is the same way but with how much she has a fit i put her in the cart anyways. they will get over the madness

I am a foster mom who adopted both children. Both children have ADHD and are the light of my life yet the bane to my existence. Like the other mom said these children tend to want to explore more. I just find that prior to leaving the house I set the expectation that any issues will end our visit to whereever we are going. That has helped especially when it was a place they enjoyed.

When my 2 boys were ages 1 and 2 I found out that my husband at the time had another son who was almost 3 and in foster care. Our first step after proving paternity was for me to be named his foster mom. He was a sweet kid and very inquisitive. When we went any were he had to check everything out and had a hard time staying at my side. I asked his counselor what to do and she said that it is normal for foster kids to want to explore their surroundings and to get him one of those harnesses with the leash. That way I could give him some space to explore but I knew were he was.
It worked. He would explore and then when he was done he would come back to me happy and content.

Hi K.,
I read To train up a child by Michael and Debi Pearl...It is a great book about discipline. It is from a Chritian perspective and you might find it useful. It is only $6 including shipping. You can find it online.