Annoying In-laws

I tend to be bold when it comes to unsolicited advice, so I would say exactly what you typed...something along the lines of "You're right, my milk is poisoned!" Don't bat an eyelash or crack a smile, just keep right on doing what you are doing. My view on it is that if somebody is rude enough to say mean things to me, then they deserve to hear a rude answer right back! I don't worry about the feelings of people who so callously disregard mine!
~L.

Congratulations on your new baby!

Let your in-laws know that you appreciate their concern, but you have talked to your doctor about the situation (I am assuming you have) and he has assured you that your milk is just fine and that colic has no real known cause. If you haven't already researched it, type "infant colic" in the search bar and you will find all kinds of information that you could print out for your in-laws - that would keep them busy for a while! Just remember, even if they are annoying and visits can be stressful, they love their new grandchild and just want to make sure that she is getting the very best.

T.

My inlaws are insane too. I am sorry to hear you are having a rough time with them on top of dealing with a Colicy baby! Have you tried wearing her? My daughter really responded to that. My friends daughter was allergic to dairy and was responding by crying a lot... try cutting dairy out of your diet for a week or two to see if she settles down a little.

If you feel like being educational with your inlaws you can say that their are countries in the world where formula is only sold by perscription. (if you need details I can get them for you)

L.

www.healthylivinghome.com

A.,
I agree with Lacy below... Sometimes a harsh response will stop the comments, but then again, they may not. What does your husband say? If it were my husbands parents I would make him take care of it, if he blew it off like I was making a big deal out of nothing, then the in-laws better watch out, because they are going to get a taste of their own rudeness for sure!
Good Luck,
J. in Macomb

My M-I-L was the same way with my first baby--she's finally starting to lay off with my second. She's absolutely repulsed by breast feeding and thinks it's disgusting, and makes comments like, "Poor little baby" among other things. It was very hard to take without blowing up, but I knew if I blew up at her then she would do the martyr thing and I would have ended up being the bad guy. (Aren't family dynamics fun?!?) I just had to ignore it--I KNEW I was doing the best thing for my baby, and I can't help it if she's ignorant. It helps if your husband is on your side--I vented to him alot, and it becomes less of an issue once your baby starts solids, which will happen before you know it. Hang in there!

You need to tell them exactly how you feel, otherwise it will eat you alive and they will have never thought a thing about it. there's nothing wrong with sticking up for yourself! Maybe you could say something like.....I appreciate your concern, but I have talked to the doctor and he/she said everything is fine, and I would appreciate you not saying anything about it again. If they can't abide by your wishes, then maybe you need to cut down on them visiting for awhile. That will get their attention;-)

Ugh!!

A.,
My ex mother in law was the same way. As far as she was concerned I didn't know what I was doing, I was too young, blah blah blah. Finally one day I asked her, "How old were you when you had your son?" she said 20, I said "Oh the same age as myself." lol So how do I take advice from a person who herself was "too young" and had no experince either?
We had some words. I stuck to my guns, I was raisng MY son the way I saw fit. If she had advice she could offer it, but she would not continue to undermine me or my decisons.
You know what? She did the same thing to his new wife when their baby was born. She actually called me and told me what a horrible mother the new wife was, on and on, and I told her "This sounds awfully familiar". I haven't heard from her in a 3 wonderful years!
Talk to your husband, hopefully he will back you up and have a sit down with these folks (my ex didn't). Advice is almost always appreciated but being told you are doing everything wrong never is.
Good luck, wish I had more to offer.
W.

In laws can't live with them or without them.
I am not sure how to respond because I have my own inlaw issues that are different from yours. Maybe you could have hubby say something to them in private or you could ask them why they think all the babies issues are breastmilk related?
Also not to play devils advocate but do you think maybe just maybe it could be the breastmilk or something your eating to cause a change in the milk? Either way I feel for you in laws are hard to deal with. They should have a college course Inlaws 101 and Mother In laws 303 :-D

A.,

After 16 years of marriage...I am finally coming up swinging!! Lol! Lacy is right, say the comment back so they can hear what they just said to you..eventually she'll stop. Or say something in a form of a question...like..."so, you think my God-given breast milk has poison in it?" She'll probably respond with.."oh, my no. I didn't mean that." You get to say..."What did you mean by that?" It puts them on the spot. They have to answer the questions. Do not let them know it hurt your feelings...that will put a notation in her mind for later...she'll know how to hurt you in the future. After 16 years, I'm finally doing it and in front of the rest of the family, because everyone is trying to be RESPECTFUL to her...in other words...they are AFRAID of offended her, even though she was wrong...and they would just rather not deal with it and it gives her the power to keep on doing it. I have found this extremely true in husbands with all brothers and no sisters in their families. Don't hesitate to call after an indicent..This allows you to think things through and appear more together and you can handle it more respectfully. Ask questions...like, "the other day when we were at the park and talking about _______ you made the comment "_______". What did you mean by that?" You set your boundaries with them....healthy boundaries. If there is a major incident. Your husband goes to bat for you. It is his parents and his responsibility!! Hope this helps.

H.

Read "the happiest baby on the block"
The 5 "S" theory.

*Swaddle
*Side lying or upright positions
*Shhhusing...white noise
*Swinging...movement~rocking, etc.
*Sucking...pacifier?

I have done this with all three of my children and I have the happiest, easiest babies ever.
OH and avoid seeing them for a while if necessary. I nurse as well and it's so aggrevating when you hear, "well she must still be hungry, maybe she didn't get enough"(my mother-in-love didn't nurse either) You just simply smile and go about doing what you think your little sweetie needs. But she is a seasoned mommy too so don't necessarily be closed minded to all her comments. I've learned a thing or two from my M.I.L.
But the book is all about "colic". It works. Trust me!
Don't have time to read the whole thing? Just skim each section. I've already outlined them for you. Some babies only need one of the five and some need them ALL to be done.
I have done ALL of them with mine and it's so easy.(:

Hi A.,
My MIL used to do the same sort of thing. It was so irritating. I finally sat down with her and explained that I appreciate that she wants to be a part of her grandchilds life but I am his mother and what I say goes and that I don't appreciate all the comments on the side. I was very direct and wasn't defensive or mad. I now have 2 boys (4 and 2) and she is GREAT now. She babysits and doesn't what I ask for the boys. Good luck.
Chris