Hi Katie,
Well my dear, this man proudly says, you're not a failure, you're normal. Millions of kids wet at night at 1 place and not another.
I'm proud of you for putting him back in the nightime pull ups, here me? I'm very proud of you for doing that. You're the most wonderful mommy he could have. I wish my mom would have done that when I wet instead of doing what she did which was very emotionally painful. I'm so proud of you Katie!
Just let this roll, it's not worth getting frustrated about. There are alot of worse things he could be doing, that's for sure, and we all know that, right? (grin)
Obviously, he needs them so that's what they make them for.
Let that bedtime between you and him be the most bonding time you can have, ok? If he lets you, you put the pull up on him, and here's another thing you could do, and you watch, he will be so excited about going night night, it will shock you! That is, rub him down with baby powder after getting that pull up on. He will love it, and he'll be out in 5 minutes!
If he likes to be held, you hold him, if touched, you touch him, if hugged, you hug or kiss him, let bedtime be special with him.
Even that age of almost 5, he's not there yet developmentally anyway, how far is he behind? Is he like 2 or 3 years old mentally?
You're not a failure, my dear, not at all. In fact, you're rewarded for getting that pull up on him at night, that's what he needs, I have worked with enough of them and their mommies and childcare providers, over the years.
Personally, I would love a son like that. I'd love on that little guy, and if he's wet in the morning, I'd gently wake him up, and put him on my lap, and pat him, and tell him, "son, daddy loves you, wet or not, and I love you with that pull up on, and if you need to wear it, daddy cares about that, too, and loves you, just the same."
He needs to hear these words from you mommy, because you're the first woman in his life, being mommy, ever thought about that? If not, that's normal, nobody thinks about that.
I'll be praying that this blows over, and you can just go on putting him pull up on nightly, till he stops wetting, and please, give him a big hug and kiss tonight, from 1 who knows what it feels like to wet at night, and not be able to help it, or, just not be ready emotionally to be a big boy, yet.
love, and again, Katie, I'm proud of you, very very much about using the pull ups!
H.