Hi N.,
Your dilemma about sleep arrangements is common. Each family is unique and each person has unique needs. When you are sleep deprived it does seem like there will never be a restful night ever again.
Our young people need our physical comfort even in their toddler years and on up. I have a 9 year old daughter and a 3 1/2 year old son.
I worked full time until my daughter was 5 years old and sleeping together at night helped us to keep connected to each other after those long days. I can see how for your daughter that being away from you all day is difficult and then being separated by an entire floor at night would feel a bit isolating to her.
>>>we took her to our bed. BAD CHOICE. Yes, I know.. I always >>>said we would not be THOSE types of parents but it was my >>>husband that took her to the bed first!
You are very fortunate to have a husband who values his daughters feelings and needs and is willing to night-time parent with you.
What is it about THOSE types of parents that is not appealing to you?
I would like to recommend a very good book for you to read , "Good Nights" by Jay Gordon and Maria Goodavag. It's a good book to help remind us that parenting is not just a nine to five job and that people no matter what age have needs at night-time.
Here is a website with some information about night time parenting that you may find helpful http://www.attachmentparenting.org/principles/night.php
Here is information for you about a local parenting support group that has very useful information about night time parenting.
The Attachment Parenting Group of Bergen County, NJ. This is the email group that is part of the Attachment Parenting International Support Group for Bergen County, New Jersey. We meet monthly, on the fourth Thursday of the month from 10:00 am - 12:00 pm. At the New Milford Library. Every 4th month the meeting is in the evening from 7 - 9pm. All are welcome!
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L. :)