Allergic Snacks Other Kids

The woman was just being a beotch. Don't give it another thought. You need to just ignore people like her.

No you were not in the wrong, at all. One of my kids has nut and fish allergies, and we take him everywhere, and he doesn't always eat in the "designated eating area". Who always has the time for that? That mother was just being a bully IMO, and wanted her voice to be heard. She would be a better advocate for her child by teaching her how to stay safe instead of yelling at strangers. I feel the way you do about this.

If I was her I'd be a lot more concerned about the rides themselves. I mean think of the hundreds of people who get off and on all day, sticky, dirty hands all over the seat belts, buckles and bars? Yuck, AND dangerous for her child.

oh fer cryin' in a bucket. it's not like you sat your kid down and started strewing ketchup packs around. you gave a THREE YEAR OLD a couple of banana chips. at an amusement park. which is created for KIDS.
unfortunately passive-aggressive bitchiepants are everywhere. you can either ignore 'em, or smile sweetly and say something like 'gee, i'd hope any mommy with a kid with deadly allergies would be a good enough mommy to always have her epi-pen with her.' or blast her, i suppose, although that would ruin the day for your kid as well.
i used to homeschool with a mom whose daughter was violently allergic to EVERYTHING. mold, pollen, any hint of scent, dogs, plants, chemicals- that poor kid. i felt just awful for her. what a life. but the mom was in a constant state of fury that the world would not conform to them. every store they went to got a barrage of nastygrams because there was a damp smell, or air freshener, or fresh flowers. no homeschool co-op would work for them because the walls were painted, or the carpets had fireproof chemicals, or someone wore scented deodorant. playdates at most homes were out because of pets or trees or grass. the mom was always railing that her daughter couldn't go out anywhere or make any friends, and it was true.
but being furious doesn't change the world, does it?
i hope your little one enjoyed the ride!
khairete
S.

I know it's hard to do, but please try to shake off this woman's snarky comments. Sounds like she was having a day and for some reason, decided to take it out on you. You did absolutely nothing wrong. Children get hungry and if we always went to the designated feeding area, we'd never get anything done! Sounds like you're a terrific mom who was focusing on your children and meeting their needs in the situation you were in. If your kids are hungry... you feed them, regardless of where you are.

I am really so over this whole allergy thing. You did nothing wrong. It seems these day parents with allergic children want the world to revolve around them. Does not work that way.

Heck my kids were allergic to dogs, so we got rid of the kids lol.

Nope you weren't wrong. Some people think they rule the world. For all she knew your son could have a medical condition that required he eat on a regulated schedule but that wouldn't be her concern because the world revolves around her.

The reason her comment was stupid is because anything eaten in the designated areas could still be carried to other areas on people's fingers. It's not like the end of the area has magic qualities and nothing can pass those boundries. Still I think you were wise to say nothing because you would have a) said you were sorry and really you did nothing wrong or b) said something that could have started an argument.

I'm deathly (literally) allergic to peanuts and allergic to tree nuts. I have never thought anything of people eating around me. When I was very young, I needed some help in navigating school and eating around other people, because they were the danger, not myself. With that said, that's why the mom was there. She could make sure her kid didn't touch the banana chips. Easy. I don't expect anyone to act as though everyone around them could have an allergy!! Neither should parents of kids with allergies.

I go places that have nuts and carry my epipen. I ask if the food has nuts before I order. I don't walk by the nut roasting wagons at amusement parks. I am responsible for protecting myself. A young child is not capable of doing that all the time, hence mom being there with an epipen. What YOU were doing shouldn't have mattered, if mom is protecting her child correctly. I hate the attitude of thinking the world has to change for the child, instead of helping the child navigate the world.

I do support nut free zones in elementary schools, because like I said...the kid with the allergy isn't dangerous to themselves...the other kids are. Kid's are messy. As an adult, I had a scary reaction to sitting on a kid's desk at an even for my niece. They had eaten peanut butter and not washed their hands after lunch. That could have killed another child, and the kid can't walk around and touch nothing!! By the time elementary is over, kids don't need help anymore.

My kids have allergies. Life-threatening allergies. But guess what? Those allergies are MY responsibility. They have nothing to do with you. That woman was just being a snarky you-know-what. You are not in the wrong and she is waaay too entitled.

They were in a public place. If you were hosting her kid at your house for a play date or if her kid were in school with yours and sitting down at the same table for snack or lunch -- yeah, she would have reason to tell you (not snark at you, tell you nicely) about his allergy. But if she's going to be this rude in every public place she takes her child, she's going to have quite an ulcer very soon from snarking at strangers. Imagine her day at Disney or any other theme park--her having to make snide comments about strangers ALL day long. How exhausting for her....and she is teaching her children that her behavior is acceptable, which is a pity for them; they'll grow up feeling that the entire world must accommodate them and that creates unpleasant people (like their mom). Instead she should be teaching them how to take responsibility for their own health and be aware of what's around them and how their bodies feel and react.

I have adult friends with severe food allergies and know kids with severe and even life-threatening food allergies, but they are not rude in the way this woman was. When the parents take the kids out, the family is armed with the right epi-pens, aware and alert, and knows they share the park with everyone else.

And those designated eating areas? Did the park indicate that you must ONLY feed your child in those areas and nowhere else? I bet not. She knew that.

Wow. That was a bit much. She obviously has issues. What a rude person. You didn't do anything wrong trying to occupy your 3 year old in a line. And you took the high road and weren't confrontational.

I never heard of an allergy to banana chips before but I guess someone could be allergic to just about anything.
I hope she gets use to always having an epipen on hand.
Snarky comments aren't going to change that reality for her.

Does Disney actually have a policy where you're only supposed to eat in designated areas? If so, I never heard about it and am guilty of violating that rule.

I guess I'm a little confused. You were at an indoor amusement park? Are there signs stating that food is to be eaten only in designated areas? If so, then yes, you were in the wrong. But I think those rules would be pretty impractical. Most people let their children eat snacks or drink beverages while they're on the go. That's why we almost never see "no food or drink" signs in the stores like we used to.

Regardless of what the rules are, that woman was being passive aggressive and rude.

ETA: No rules against eating at this amusement park? Then what she said was ridiculous!!!

I think she is being a tad dramatic.

I totally would have done what you did. infact we had some pb and j in lines at Disney. we used hand sanitizer before and after. I have to say if my child were that severely allergic, then I don't think the fun of Disney would have been worth the worry of death.

I don't by any means want anyone to die from an allergic reaction but I also don't understand taking risks with something as deadly as this. and that is what that mom would have been doing if she had not had her epi pen handy.

She brought her epi pen because her kid has an allergy. period. She made a snarky remark because she feels bitter about the hand life has dealt her. It must be hard to worry when taking kids to public places, but she has no way to know that every toddler, preschooler and older child has washed their hands before getting in line. I tend to have my kids wash hands before eating, not after. So no different than a toddler snacking in line. I hope her child stays healthy, I'm sure you do too.

Eating in designated areas has nothing to do with allergies. It has everything to do with sanitation and contamination. If we eat outside the designated area at the pool, the debris might get in the pool and make it gross. It is for eating, not for eating particular items. And even then it's not like people always wash their hands after eating their ice cream.

Your offense was eating in line instead of in the correct area. You weren't offering her kid any food or touching her kid, and if her child is so highly allergic that he can't even be in an outside venue without concern, then maybe an amusement park is not the place for him. If my DD needed an epi pen for breathing in apples....we'd be in a world of hurt because even fast food places serve apples now. And that would be OUR problem.

ETA: If there was no strict "eat here" area, then she didn't even have that leg to stand on.

.... there was NO way, that you would know her kid was allergic to banana chips.
She expects everyone in the world, to know that?
Yeah, right.
And as you said, there were NO signs, even designating an eating area for people.
She is responsible, for having the EpiPen. Everywhere she goes.

There is NO way, that everyone in this world, can know, what everyone elses allergies are and when and where. And if everyone has to be segregated due to allergies, in public areas... then how is that going to work anyway?
And per public places... there are HUNDREDS of people daily, day and night, who touch surfaces/eat/use their fingers on things/touch things, and there is NO possible way, to keep every single surface in a public place... free of residues or allergens or contaminates by foods or other peoples foods and hands/fingers which touched food substances and then touched another environmental surface.
And there is no way, every single minute centimeter of any surface, can be scrubbed clean of any residues etc. And hence, any surface a person touches, can perhaps trigger any said allergy in a specific person. It is not just by standing next to a person with food, that may trigger an allergic reaction. It is also, any surface in which any previous person has touched etc.

Hence, people with any said allergy, it is also their responsibility to have their Epi Pen on them. Or as I see in my city, some people even wear face masks, to prevent inhalation of any allergens. Those medical face mask types. They, do what they can, for their own health.

I get that the world is scary for us parents who have children with severe allergies. But short of living inside a bubble we can not protect our children 100%.

Should you have fed your kid in the designated area? Probably. Do most people follow this rule? Unlikely. Even those of us who have children afflicted with allergies have broken this rule, blatantly or simply because we have not even thought of the ramifications.

Sadly, we live in a world where our concerns and sympathy seems to solely revolve around ourselves and what is familiar. Those with allergy inflicted kids expect others to be wary and those who don't have children with allergies are more concerned about the inconvenience. The truth is, it is unrealistic to expect the people around us to behave one way or the other.

To assume that every one in public is not carrying nuts in their pocket can be the death for my child. Sure, I can keep her in the safety of our home. But what kind of life would the be. Instead, I choose to educate her on how to use her epi pen and to constantly have benadryl in hand and obviously avoid food that are not from home.

To strut with the attitude that it is solely the responsibility of the parent of children with allergies to be "careful" about their children can result in the death of a child (or an adult with allergy). I would think that that would be hard for most of us to live with. Unfortunately, some kids allergies are airborne.

In the end we have to make our own choices.

As far as snarky comments. I have not heard one that I have liked. They are always unnecessary regardless of your stance.

ETA: Here's a scary reality. Sometimes the epipen does not work
http://fox40.com/local-news/stories/teen-dies-from-peanut...

Other people's kids' allergies are not my problem.
My daughter had a food allergy as a child. Luckily, she grew out of it. But it was MY job to make sure she didn't get hold of foods she was allergic to.

My oldest stepdaughter has a food allergy of anaphylactic proportions. Again, it is not the responsibility of the public at large to make sure that they don't eat anything she is allergic to in her presence. It is HER responsibility to be mindful of her surroundings and keep herself safe.

I'm allergic to banana's too but wouldn't have said anything to anyone else unless I started itching in my throat. I always have a bottle of liquid Benadryl in my purse.

I have a ton of allergies and I strongly feel it is MY responsibility to manage my own allergies. No one has to limit what they eat around me, It's not their job, it's mine.

You're in the wrong. There are designated eating areas for a reason. What exactly are you teaching your children by not following the rules?

If there aren't rules about where to eat, I think it's ok to eat in line, especially something like banana chips that don't contain any of the major 8 allergens. I would not whip out a bag of peanuts, since those can be a lot more problematic, but I think anything else is pretty much fair game. If there are rules about not eating in line, I would expect them to be followed.

My son has a lot of allergies so I do think a little more about giving snacks at the park, in lines, etc. But I still do it and wouldn't tell anyone else not too unless I could specifically see that it would cause a major problem for my son. And even then, I'd speak to her nicely, explain the situation, apologize, and express my understanding that I'm being a pain in the neck.

My husband is a Type I diabetic, and there have been times, specifically in amusement parks, where I have HAD to give him food to raise his blood sugar. So he wouldn't become highly altered and then unconscious. My thought when I read your post was like Diane D, how does she know your kiddo does not need the food just as much as her kiddo needs to stay away from it?
ETA- @ Suz T...LOL...bitchiepants!!...

If her child is that allergic, I can understand her concern; however, given his allergy (if it's that severe) even if people only eat in the designated areas doesn't mean they washed their hands and wouldn't contaminate other things that their kid could come in contact with.

We don't eat in lines but we may sit on a bench to have a snack.

My son has allergies, and I cannot tell you how many times he has had reactions while we are at parks. We are fortunate in that he has only gotten
hives, but I do wish people would clean their kids hands after letting them eat obvious foods like peanut butter.

I find myself being super cautious at certain public places --places that sell drum sticks or other peanut products.

You say she shouldnt bring him to indoor places, or keep a watchful eye. Did you do your part and wash your kids hands after they got food product all over things outside the eating area? Don't you understand that a kid with a severe allergy can get very sick if they touch a ride that a kid has touched if they had food on their hands? This is why we always carry an epi, but I'm an atheist that prays I never have to use it.

We all need to be compassionate. Our friends eat peanut butter around my son, but they clean their hands with wipes before going to the bathroom for a real wash. We all need to do our part as members of a community. This lady was upset because most people without kids with allergies just think we should stay home and not inconvenience them. I don't find that very neighborly, but most people are selfish, so I've stopped expecting people to be nice to each other.

If her child has allergies she should always have an epiepn!

I do not let my kids eat outside of designated eating areas for many reasons, but allergies really isn't one of them. I like my kids to sit down at a table to eat snacks, then wash their hands before returning to play. They also eat at designated snack times, not just grazing. Also because kids often make a mess when eating, I like to contain the mess to the designated area. I work at the Y and people are always giving kids snacks in area where food is not permitted, like at the playstructure and the change rooms, and what a mess it makes. It's pretty gross. Kids can learn to wait five minutes for a snack and eat in the designated areas.

ETA: I'm not saying that your child was making a mess with banana chips. He likely wasn't. Just as a rule I would like to see snacks eaten in an appropriate area. Our Y is a clean facility, and our cleaning staff work hard to keep it that way. People like to come because they appreciate how clean it is. While the banana chips wouldn't have made a big mess, the next kid with the yogurt, fruit cup, ketchup, chocolate etc would make a mess. Imagine that stuff all over the floor in the change rooms, or under your feet while you are standing in line for a ride. Yuck. So for my kids they only eat at the table at snack time, even if there isn't a rule posted. It is sort of a courtesy thing.

IMHO, if her child is so allergic as to have a reaction from standing by someone who is eating what he is allergic to, then she should not take that child to a popular, public place. She cannot control other people; only herself. She should havwe exercised that control!