Advise Please on What Happens on the Schoolyard !!!

This is why kindergarten goes out after the other kids or well before them. It is why they sit in front of the bus and eat separately, in many schools.

Yes it is normal stuff, but kids in 3rd through 5th grades will gang up on kindergartners too.

In kinder my kids were not left unsupervised on the playground. By 3rd they were better able to handle "big kids".

I think you AND your husband are right on this issue. You stepped in, as you should have when you saw that your son was upset/hurt. Your husband is right because it is normal boy stuff. Boys are rough! It is so PC today to assume that every kid who plays rough is a bully. That's just not the case. Your son learned an important lesson. If I play with the big boys, I'm probably going to get hurt. If he goes back and plays with them again, he thinks he can handle it. Just watch the situation. Be careful not to jump in every time you see something go wrong because you want your son to learn how to deal with tough situations. It is an important part of growing up.

First - you weren't there.
Second - he may have gotten hurt by the ball being thrown too hard and they went to see if he was okay and he got nervous. They may have been asking if he was okay and he was trying - unsuccessfully - to save face. If he thought he was old enough to play, he should be old enough to take the bumps that go along with playing.
There are two sides to every story and the truth is somewhere in the middle.
Just stay and watch next time -- if there is one.
LBC

Those kids on the playground know better, and they also know that their behavior is not going to be okay if they got caught. Your husbands attitude, is the very attitude that enables bad behavior in kids like this. They are not little cavemen that need to be dropped in the "wild" in hopes of surviving. We have evolved and such behavior should never be acceptable, no matter what! Bottom line, it's poor behavior = not okay!

My experience is to just always supervise. So, let him throw a few passes in the morning before school if he wants to, but stand there and watch, and then walk him in with him. The teachers will watch on the playground. And you can stand and watch during a few passes after school. You don't want him to not participate....you just want him to be safe...and you want to witness both sides of what is going on.

if your son is young enough that you usually bring him into the classroom I would not leave him outside at all. the teachers are usually outside supervising but it has been my experience that kids that young (kindergarten first grade ish) are not usually allowed outside on the playground in the mornings. I would have interveined as well but I wouldn't let him go play int he mornings. take him to his classroom.

Yes, back in our day that used to be usual schoolyard stuff. However, with all the bullying going on, this IS an issue, especially at school. At my daughter's school, they are not even allowed to play tag because kids are to keep their hands to themselves. I know they still play it, as well as their fun versions of duck duck goose, but it's highly supervised. Schools are required to make school a safe place for kids and will go overboard, but I'd rather it be that way, even if it goes overboard sometimes.

Hi B., I know you already got lots of great advice, but I wanted to let you know that my daughter just started Kindergarten and the same sort of thing happened to her. There's a much bigger girl in her class that has taken to picking my daughter up and tossing her, or running while holding hands with her and then flinging her to the ground. I learned this on my first recess volunteer day and was absolutely mortified! I wanted to jump in, and finally did when they were holding hands running straight for the metal monkey bars! After sprinting home and calling my husband in an absolute panic (by the way my husband said exactly what yours did), I realized that in 3 years of preschool my daughter had never encountered a "friend" like this, so I was going to have to teach her how to protect herself. On our walk home from school that day we chatted about what she should do if a friend or random other kid is being rough. As someone else said, she should tell them to stop and if they don't, go play with someone else, and if they still won't stop, tell a grown-up. I'm still not sure if that message has sunken in with my daughter, so I'm planning to review it every so often. Anyway, I wanted you to know you're not alone. Those mommy protection urges are hard to quell -- and yes, it seems a new chapter of parenting has begun. I hope I'm ready for this... :) Best wishes with this big transition and with the impending new arrival!

Our school has drop off at the Kinder/1st grade playground before school. There are yard monitors watching.

However, what you should be teaching your son is how to deal with hard/awkward situations, not bailing him out every time something happens. I tell my DD that if someone is messing with her, she asks them to stop, and/or goes to find someone else to play with, or goes somewhere else. If the kid is still bothering her, then she is to tell an adult. The earlier you can teach your kids to be self sufficient & to stand up for themselves, the better. How is he supposed to learn if you are always intervening? You will not be able to save him from hard situations & you can't be there all the time, and teaching him how to handle himself is far more beneficial than getting upset every single time something like this happens to him.

Not to mention, you weren't there, you didn't see/hear the whole situation, and 5 year olds are notorious for exaggerating & making things up.