Sending Boys to Kindergarten at 6 Instead of 5...? - Pittston,PA

Hi J., my two boys started K at age 4 (fall bdays). They did very well all the way through. The oldest is a sophomore in college, and the next is off to college in Sept (both being 17 as college freshman).

In hindsight, if I'd waited a year, then I would've had them HOME for another year too, sigh. What's the big ole rush, right?

:)

It would be far more benefical for him to wait till he's 6. This is a proven fact and society is just hardly beginning to catch up. One of my sons went later and he nor I never regretted it. Don't worry about when he's a teen, it'll be fine.

My two cents -- the best to you!

I saw that segment and also as a teacher--I agree! Hold him back and build self-esteem with him at home before sending him.

As a high school teacher, I recommend holding them back. High school years are really tough on boys who are the youngest in the class - physically and socially. Their involvement in extra-curricular activities, whether sports, debate, music, academic decathlon, whatever, is more valuable and meaningful when they have another year of maturity.

I really think it is a decision that needs to be made with more information on the child. They are all different. My second son turned 5 in the month of September so we were wondering if he was going to be too young. His preschool teacher said he was definitely ready and at his first parent/teacher conference his kindergarten teacher said he was doing great and she was glad we hadn't waited thinking he may have been bored. Now my nephew was on the young side as well. Bright academically but has had a really rough time due to his social immaturity. He definitely could have used an extra year. Really look at the individual child.

My older son has an April birthday, so he started kindergarten at 5 - closer to five and a half. That worked.

My younger son's birthday is in September. He went to kindergarten just before he turned five, but then we decided that he would get to (not HAVE to) have another year of kindergarten (at a different school) before he tackled first grade. That seemed to work well for him.

The trouble is not the kindergarten; it's having, perhaps, to repeat a grade later on because of academic or emotional immaturity. The older a child gets, the harder that is on the child.

However, I would not base an important decision like this on information from any television show. I would go talk to the kindergarten teacher and the principal! :^)

As a Mom to 4 boys with October birthdays I did not have a choice...all of my boys have entered into K then turned 6 less than 1 month later! So far, it hasn't been too big of an issue EXCEPT for the fact that they are/will be 18 throughout their ENTIRE senior year and that CAN become a problem! Just too much temptation with the ability to check themselves in and out of school whenever they choose!

It's a decision only you can make, but my mother (an educational consultant) has done tons of research on this, and has read probably every study ever done on this issue. There is a TON of information showing that for boys that are at the lowest end of the maturity scale - both emotional and social, it's worth holding them back if their birthdays are close to the cut off. Close to the cut off is usually interpreted as three months. So if the cut off is 9/1, they see benefit of holding boys back if their birthday is 6/1 or later.

On the other hand, the same studies show that there is a negative result if parents hold back a boy who is at the same emotional and social readiness as his peers. He'll start as a 6 year old and will be "ahead" of his classmates socially... and will not fit in during his elementary and middle school years. The research my mom has read says that the worst thing a parent can do is hold a boy back who is ready for school. So ask yourself if your son seems to handle things the same as other kids his age. If he does, he'd benefit from kindergarten. But if you have that sneaking suspicion that he's weepier and clingier than his age-mates, if he doesn't play well with other kids yet, and if he interacts more like a 3 or 4 year old than a 5 year old, he would perhaps benefit from starting kindergarten a year late. But don't just hold him out because people say it's always a good idea. With a March birthday, your son is already going to be one of the older kids in the class, or at least in the middle.

I'm all for holding back but with an April bday, that seems excessive. It almost seems like an arms race at some point. You hold back an early April bday so other people want their sons to be older so hold back a Feb bday. That's getting out of control. If your son is reasonably mature etc, 5.5 for K is FINE. My oldest daughter wasn't even 5 yet. That was a marginal call and if she was a boy, I'd have held her back. But your son is in the sweet spot. Won't be really young or old if you send him this year.

All I know is from a teacher's perspective, if you are the oldest in your class in 4th or 5th grade and beyond. And you're older by like a whole year, year and a half from your peers - kids are cruel and they may claim that he was held back a year and tease him for it. ie: "Johnny, you are turning 12 and you're in 5th grade?? The rest of us are 10, turning 11. Did you fail one year?" "No." "Liar. You had to repeat a grade didn't you. Dummy."

I'm not saying your son is dumb by any means. But kids may tease him. They may not. Just be ready if it does happen. Each kid would handle the situation differently. One kid may be able to handle the possible teasing. Another kid would be devastated.

I think starting your son at 5.5 is just fine, it is the boys who go in right at 5 esp with out any prior understanding of schooling (PreK) that seems to struggle and I think it is not only boys but girls too. Yes, in general, girls tend to be more mature earlier in life than boys but I think the start of kindergarden comes down to readiness and maturity. My son will be starting kindergarden a few weeks before turning 6 for a few reasons:
1. He needed a year of Special Ed Pre K - he went from MLP to nothing in 7months (Go teachers!)
2. His age does not meet the criteria until then for Kindergarden
3. Even if the age was December vs September I would have waited due to his maturity level and inexperience with a school setting.
I think you have to look at many factors in deciding when to start your child in school. One of the things that stuck out to me in a kindergarden transition meeting I recently attended was the teachers are looking for children that are READY and ABLE to learn more than kids who already know things. Teachers rather have a 5 or 6 year old who does not know their alphabet or numbers or anything acedemic but CAN sit calmly and attentively and is ready to take in what he/she has to offer the child. I think that should be your focus when deciding is my child ready - not age.

my oldest son turned 5 on august 13, the cut off was september 1. He went for 3 days and it was agreed by all that he was just not ready. So we pulled him out and he did another year of preschool. He graduated from college last may. It did him a lot of good to be held out for that year. he was socially ready and mentally able to sit still and listen. he was just more well equipt to do the work. He graduated from college with a 3.9 has a great job and is over all doing great. So yes good deal for him.

son #2's birthday is january 5 so he turned 5 9 months before kindergarten. we did not keep him back just let him start as he was already older. he graduates from NIU this may. Also doing great. good job already going.

son #3 birthday is june 21. we started him in kindergarten that august. he did ok but not great. they pushed him on to first grade. he did ok again but was steady falling behind in things. so we held him back and he did first grade again. It was the best choice but let me tell you this one has embarrassment about "flunking" first grade. his words not ours and if I had it to do over I would have held him back.

My son turned 5 in June and started K in Sept - so he went pretty much all the way thru K being 5. It was fine for him and he had never went to preschool or daycare or anything. Depends on the kid. How is your son when you want him to focus and learn something? Does he practice writing his name with no problems. Do you think he's ready for a classroom environment - sitting still etc???

ETA - he is now in 4th grade at 9yrs old and is doing great socially and academically - he is in Academically Talented classess!

I sent my son, who turned 5 in July, to Kindergarten this fall. We briefly considered holding him back, but both his school therapist and his preschool teacher said it would be a waste of time and money. He is a class clown and Mr. Social. At the beginning of the year it was clear he was the youngest. He knew very little. Now mid way through, he has caught up and exceeded many of the others. I think if your child has difficulty socially, maybe holding them back is the way to go, but academically they all catch up. I know some will make the argument about going away to school at 17, but I was 17 when I went away and did just fine. It always gets me that because a child is a boy they would consider holding them back, when if it was a girl they wouldn't consider it. A friend of mine's son turned 5 the day before K started and she agonized about sending him. She finally did and was so glad she did. Unlike my son, her son knew all of his letters and was reading already. Holding him back because he was a boy wouldn't have helped him at all. In life, someone will always be the youngest, and if the cutoff for registration hadn't changed from 12/31 to 8/30, I wonder how many people would be having this discussion. And I really don't think my son would be any different academically or socially if we waited, he is who he is.

It's really more about your child's maturity than his chronological age. If he has attended preschool and is doing well, there's no need to hold him back. With an April birthday, he won't be a "young 5" going to Kindergarten.

If your son is immature, then holding him out the year is helpful. If not, you may have a very bored preschooler on your hands!

my son will turn 5 in July. We are sending him to K this Sept. There is no reason to hold someone back just because he is a boy. Now, if he is behind socially, then go ahead and hold him back. But I do not agree with holding back only because he is a boy. If he is ready, then send him

I wish our godson had started K a year later. His parents were advised to have him repeat kindergarten -- not because of any academic issues, because he was extremely bright academically, but because he was so very disorganized and just not ready to move on to first grade. But his parents had him move on anyway out of fear he'd be bored, and it took him until about fifth or sixth grade really to pull himself together and be organized enough to do as well in school as he was capable of doing. Had he begun K later it would have helped. Same goes for many friends' sons I've observed -- at five, many boys are just not ready to settle enough to pay attention in K.

And frankly, be aware that these days, K is more like what first grade was years ago -- and first grade has a LOT higher expectations than many parents realize. You know your son best. But it is much, much easier to hold a child back and start a year later than to start school on time and have to make tough choices about repeating grades!

I think it has everything to do with the individual kid. Statistics are great for overall understanding, but they don't show what YOUR kid can do or will do. I have a son with a July birthday. In his kindergarten class was a kid with the SAME birthday. The difference between them was night and day. My son was ready for Kindergarten, thrived there, and is doing great. Nearing the end of 1st grade now, I know it was the right decision to not hold him back. He would be even more bored than he already is. The other boy ended up repeating kindergarten and that was the best decision for him (I know his mom well). Emotionally, academically, and socially that child was not ready to move on. So you need to look at your child and think about him, and not about the statistics. Is he academically prepared? (Find out what the teachers are looking for entering Kindergarten and what they are expected to know by the time the leave. You are his mom and know him best, so you'll know if he will be capable of doing it.) Is he emotionally prepared? (Observe other kids around his age. Does he seem more like the younger ones or the older ones? Does he get along with kids his own age and older?) Is he socially ready? (Check out the milestones that kids are supposed to be meeting, especially the social ones like playing in groups. Has he met them on time, ahead of time, or does he generally lag behind others.) You know your child best, so stop thinking about all the other kids and think about your child and how to best prepare him to meet the world as a productive adult.
Good luck!

It really depends upon the child. How much social interaction has he had? Has he done pre-school? Daycare? How many siblings does he have that are close in age? Lots of cousins around all the time?

Both of my boys were raised in highly social environments. They went to daycare and preschool. I'm military, so they were used to being around a lot of kids while I was on duty during the day. They were also very used to meeting new people and strange situations.

So I didn't hold my boys back because to me, they were ready. And they've both done great.

Sit down with a peice of paper and write a list. One side should say "Reasons he's ready" and the other should say "Reasons he's not ready." Based on that list, seeing it right there in front of you, you should be able to make an informed choice.

Best of luck to you!

I have a December baby. He started school a 5 and turned 6 half way thru the year. He has done well so far.

I didn't read the other responses. But I actually have a boy currently in Kindergarten and he's basically the youngest in the class. He does have some boys in the class that were held back so they are more than the typical amount older based on actual school cut-off. I see no reason to hold anyone back just based on gender or age. I rely on the teacher to tell me how he's doing. Do I think he may be a little less mature than some of the older boys, maybe...but he's also more mature than some of them too. But he's doing very well academically, he's tall for his age so he doesn't have that to overcome and if he's a little less mature...that'll work itself out. He has friends and does well socially, so that's enough for me. Is your son in preschool, and if so how is he doing? If he is in school I would rely on the teacher's opinion and if there's no real reason to hold him back I wouldn't. I would much prefer my child to be challenged than bored.

my son was actually 4 when he started. it was back in the days of half-day kindergarten, and he'd been in full time day care so was well-prepared for it. it worked out fine.
but it would have been fine too to wait. i'm not sure looking back now why i thought it was such a good idea, other than that niggling back-of-the-brain competitiveness that most moms have but don't admit<G>.
i think the reasons to slow down and let kids be kids way outweigh the rush to eddicate them in the cradle.
:) khairete
S.

Here is my mom wisdom (not based on any research), for what it's worth:

While I understand that boys "mature" slower than girls, the best way to help them to mature is to set appropriate expectations (rather than simply waiting for it to happen on their own). I also believe that boys get in far more trouble when they're bored. For this reason, we sent our twin boys to kindergarten this year (they are two of the youngest, with May birthdays) and I'm glad we did. They have done remarkably well. In our case, we know that we have bright children, we have a good school district, and I spend time reinforcing any challenging concepts that they're learning. I am absolutely sure that another year would not have eased their transition any more (and would have certainly increased their boredom, since they are already reading well above many of the others in their class). This leads into my other annoyance with this topic... There is no "one size fits all" answer to this and I'm tired of hearing that kindergarten is too hard these days or that boys can't behave like girls or that this one choice that we make will permanently determine how our children will grow up or that blah blah... Too many people trying to dictate to others, in my opinion. Trust your gut. If your son is ready to handle a full week of school, if he is intellectually curious and you are ready to support him in his transition, then go for it. All the other stuff, we tackle when it comes. That's what parenting is, making the best decisions at the time and then adapting to our growing angels, all while trying not to second-guess every choice we make :)

* Oh yeah, I don't mean to imply that our boys don't get into their share of trouble, but that's how they learn. I have one, in particular, who is a boundary pusher. I know in my heart that this will not change in one year or two or three, so why wait? I also know in my heart that it's a great thing that there were no "daily behavior charts" when I was in kindergarten or my folks would have laid into me (despite being the scientifically proven more mature girl)... lol ;)

One more thing I forgot to mention... I did meet with a teacher at the elementary school last spring to find out what they expected of students who were starting kindergarten. This was what really confirmed my decision, so it may be something that would be helpful for you to try.

I sent my son to kindergarten at age 5. And I totally regretted it. He struggled for the first couple of years academically. He is extremely bright, but it still took him a couple of years to catch up with the other students on basics. Then it seemed okay for awhile. Once we hit junior high, it became apparent that he was very young and immature. He is now 16, a junior in high school and so immature for a high school junior. I SO wish I had waited.

If you're anxious to send your kid off to school, or need to save the cash you're paying for preschool, send your kid. Then have him repeat it! That's what my SIL in did. Her son was in a special funded preschool program because he had some speech issues. When he hit 5, he didn't qualify anymore and said he was ready for K. She didn't agree, so she let him go. And then just had him repeat it.

Good luck.

It depends on your kid and what you are doing for preschool. March is not a late Birthday at all. My son turned 6 in February and is doing great in K this year. However, he had 2 years of preschool first. The first year was rough behavior wise and then the second year of preschool he hit his stride and did well.

When I was a kid I started K early--in those days you didn't have to be 5 until December 31. I missed the cutoff by 3 days. Kindergarten at 4.5 with no preschool wasn't good especially since I was shy. I ended up doing first grade at 2 different schools (we moved). Yes, it was much easier to be the oldest kid in the class. As an adult I sometimes wish I had the extra year since I was 28 before I finished grad school.

I wouldn't delay a child who is the right age for the grade unless he is struggling with behavior, social skills or something along those lines. I think it is better to just prepare him for school.

My daughter was the second youngest in elementary school. She could read before Kindergarten and was super social and comfortable in all of her activities and school. She graduated at 17 with many scholarships as many of her friends did. But you didn't ask about girls.

My sister-in-law sent her two boys (Sept. and Oct. birthdays) to K a year later. Very smart guys, play sports and now she is regretting it and wish she hasn't got caught up in "hold the boys back" stuff.

With your son starting Kindergarten at 6.5 he will be 19+ when he graduates and will be able to drive when he is a Freshman. I wouldn't prefer that for my child. Can you meet with the school to help with your decision? Good luck!

In your case I would send my son because he would not be a "new 5" he would be 5 1/2.
I have two boys that have birthdays in September. They both had to start kindergarten as almost 6 year olds. It was the BEST decision I made to wait and not test them in. (My oldest child is ONE DAY after the cutoff). My oldest son just tested for the academically advanced classes (4th grade).
I have a girlfriend whos son is one month older than mine and she sent him off to kindergarten a year earlier than mine went. He is struggling socially. Academically he is doing fine but emotionally and socially he is having a really hard time.
Each child is different. Watch your son. Does he get along well with other kids? Can he follow directions well? Will he share? Does he cry easily?
Those are all things I looked at with my boys and were what made me wait the extra year to put them in school.
I will say, my second son is a bit bored at school. He is in a 1/2 day program (since full day is $300 a month) and academically higher than most of his class. So, we have web sites he looks at at home and higher math and science homework that he does at home to still academically challenge him.
L.

You've already had a lot of responses here but I'm gonna weigh in anyway ;) I can look at this from 2 perspectives: 1) before our 2 boys, I worked at the elemenarty level, predominantly in K, for along time. It was very easy to pick out the kids who were younger. While they may have been doing fine academically, emotionally & maturity-wise, they were struggling. One little boy comes to mind every time I think of this; he was very small for his age, incrediblely bright but also incrediblely immature. I think this stemmed from being an only child who was adorable, small & babied by his parents. For 4 years, I watched this boy struggle emotionally; to make friends, to solve problems & to interact on an age-appropriate level. The K teacher wanted to hold him back but knew based on his academic skills, it wouldn't have worked. I'd be curious to see how he fared thru middle school. Fast forward & I am now the mom of 2 boys. Our oldest has a late November bday, is 11.5 & in the 5th grade. He's not the oldest in his class nor is he the only one who is 11.5. Academically, he couldn've gone to K at 4 3/4 as he knew the whole alphabet & it sounds, was starting to sound out & write 3 letter words, knew some sight words & could count well past 100 as well as being able to do basic addtion & subtraction but emotionally & maturity-wise, not there. It's about impulsivity & self-control. Both of which finally came together for him about the end of 2nd grade. Still issues that crop up occassionally but mostly at home. I look at the youngest boy in his class who was 10 in September (pretty much a whole year younger than most of his classmates) & while he keeps up academically, he struggles w/maturity & friendships. He still gets quite pissy if things do not go his way & does resort to crying in an attempt to get empathy as well as get his way. Our second son has a June 15th bday & is now 6.5 yrs. We started him in K last year at 5 1/4 but by Thanksgiving, we pulled him out. Very apparent he just wasn't ready on all levels. Pulled him out & found a wonderful Bridge K program. He's now in K again & is very ready to be there & is on par emotionally & academically w/his peers. I live in CA & see that you live in PA. Standardized tests play a big part in public education here & most of the teaching is to be done in preparation for that test in 2nd grade. So, at my younger son's school, 1st grade is a big leap from K on an academic level as is the case w/most CA schools. The time of having to sit & work is much longer than in K. The academic expectations are much higher as is the need to finish 1st grade reading in order to take that test in 2nd. Not all kids are ready to read at the end of 1st grade. So, look into what is expected on the 1st grade level & going into 2nd at your son's school & use that as a factor in your desicion. But, as you will be told over & over, it's really a personal decision based on your son & his academic abilities as well as his maturity. Keep in contact w/his repschool teachers over these next few months to see if he's ready, look into you local school district (if you're sending him public) to see what they expect for K readiness. Best of luck!

Where my son started school, the cut off was - you must be 5 yrs old on or before Sept 30 in order to begin kindergarten.
My son's birthday is end of Oct.
So he was 5 in kindergarten for about 2 months before he turned 6.
There are a few kids who are older than him (early Oct birthdays) but not very many.
It's worked out very well for him.
He shot up in height fairly early and has always been the tallest in his class.
At 13 right now, he's commonly mistaken for 16, but he does very well in school and he's a popular kid - it seems many look up to him (how can they not - he's 5'8" and still growing. He's taller than a lot of his teachers, too.).
He's never had bully problems and he's a gentle giant himself, but he's also a 2nd don black belt in taekwondo and can stand up for himself if he needs to.
Some kids are ready to go earlier than others - it depends on the kid.
But being on the older side has been a good thing for my son.

My kids all have spring/early summer birthdays and all went at 5, or will. My youngest turned 5 on the 12th and he will be going this year. I don't understand why you would wait.

I have friends who waited because their son missed the mark by two weeks and he is now in 2nd grade and even they say he is out of place, socially and educationally...but skipping him is not an option either.

So I think it depends on the kid, but I would never hold back one of my kids.

In my opinion I think it is detrimental to hold a child back. I just don't understand why people expect kids to flunk kindergarten....

My grandson missed too many mornings when he lived with his dad. He was only 10-15 minutes late each day but every one of them added a half day of absence to his record, every other day was a whole day absent. She he was held back in first grade.

When he plays sports he is not with the kids his age, he plays with kids his age and a year ahead of him in school. It is often embarrassing to him for them to know he's behind them. They often know higher math and words than he knows too. It was really hard when his soccer team was reading a newsletter and he didn't know how to read yet.

He is 13 now and it is even more obvious to him that he is behind the kids his age. He goes to sports and activities at church and since he is still in elementary school and ALL his teammates and youth at church are in jr. high or middle school.

Think about the options he will have when he is a JUNIOR in high school. He can legally spend the night at his girlfriends house, go out partying all night, can drop out of high school, there will be absolutely nothing you can do about it. You could boot him to the curb of course but he could just go live in a flop house some friend has.

I think about these things all the time because my grandson is super smart. He wants to skip a grade by the next year so he can be with kids his own age.

He has also been at least a foot taller than anyone else at his school for 2 years. The teachers are the only ones taller than him. He is so self conscious of his size and is continually embarrassed.

I think if a child has some sort of learning disability that would benefit from taking kindergarten twice or to put them in a transitional 1st grade that would be fine. They may show a need to do that.

Otherwise let them start school on time, the social impact on them is horrible if they don't.

It is NOT true they don't think about it. They realize one day they are not with kids their age and they internalize that they are stupid and could not do the work.

If your son is turning 5 next week, then mathematically, he is probably in the very center of the average age of other boys in his class. My son turned 5 in mid-July, and we sent him right on time. He is doing just fine. Sure, he has the typical forgetfulness stuff that lots of boys have. But that doesn't magically disappear at some age. He's 13 and going into 9th grade in August. And yeah... I can say that with confidence, because there is just no way academically that he has any likelihood of not passing.

He is very social and has lots of friends.

My almost 15 year old son, born in May, started kindergarten at age 5. He did very well, and has continued. He's a freshman in high school with a 4.0 GPA. He was ready, but to be honest, I didn't give it much thought. Now I have a 5 year old, but the cute off date in Texas is September 1st. Therefore, he'll be 5 when he starts kindergarten but in a couple of weeks after it starts he'll be 6. This upset me at first that he couldn't start this year. He was in preschool last year and this year, he has a speech delay, but since starting school he's really came out of his shell. I think it was good for him to start this coming fall for kindergarten. He does well in the school setting, but for him, I think it's better that his birthday did prevent him from starting.

You know your son, does he seem to be ready.

My daughter is in kinder this year.. she is older her bday is 20 days past the cutoff for our state.. she is the oldest in the class. ... the teacher says she is the best writer, in the top reading group... the best all around student.. there is a bday chart up.. they also hang the kids art and writing up on the walls.. you can look at the birthday chart and the art .. and the older kids draw better write better.. they are older and just better at lmost all kinder skills.-- that being said.. kindergarden moves slowly.. very very slowly.. they are reading but very simple books..they have to move the learning at a pace that the kids can keep up.. so it is slow.

my son.. has a june bday.. cutoff is dec 1... he is young immature... and a class clown.. just goofy.. He will go to school next year.. academically he is super smart.. he can read.. very well.. but he can not sit still.. I am expecting we will have issues with his behavior. I can not hold him back as he is in the middle of the age range and he is smart. but I have big concerns about him in the classroom..

when is the cuttoff for your state.. if his bday is in March.. I think he should go to school with his peers.

It all depends on the maturity of your son. My youngest is a June baby and he started when he was 5. He was one of the youngest in his class. We could not afford to hold him back a year and not start him. But we did end up holding him back in 2nd grade. There was other reasons for it besides maturity he had issues with his eyes that we had to correct but he is doing so much better now. But with my oldest I sometimes wish I could have started him at 4 and he would have been fine. Since he was already reading. It all depends on your child. My husband was a July baby and made straight A's all through school and started at 5.

Good luck with what ever you decide and God Bless!

My son went at 6 and im not sending my daughter until next year even though she just turned 5. Its a personal choice, although with our experience, older was better. Good luck!

Hello,
I have a son that turned 5 on July 1st the year he started kingergarten. I would venture to say that he was probably the youngest in his class and he struggled quite a bit in kindergarten. However, he passed into the first grade. This year, again, he is the youngest in the class. His attention span is really quite lax to say the least. And, he just does not seem to "get it" when it comes to certain things. He is really struggling this year with his courses and I am almost 100% sure that I will be holding him back in the first grade again this year. I have met with the teacher and she is in total agreement with me that he is not really ready for the second grade yet. I had a conference with her recently and we went over the issue with his lessons. He is really having a hard time. He just does not seem to have the maturity to settle down and work on his studies. In my honest opinion I think it would have been best to wait until the following year to enter him into kindergarten. However, at the time, his father was totally against the idea of waiting that year. But, as you can see, that probably would have been the best thing to do for my son. My recommendation: If you can wait a year DO IT! It will only benefit your son in the long run. I hope this helps.

D.

My stepson has an April birthday and he went to kindergarten at 5. My oldest son has a December birthday and he went to kindergarten last fall at 5. My second son has a January birthday and he will go to kindergarten this coming fall at age 5. The first two have done fine, as I'm sure the third will as well- there wasn't/isn't a question of when to start any of them, as their birthdays are no where near the cut off. My next in line will turn 5 in September 2013 and I am about 99.9% sure that we will hold him back. He makes the cut off to start as a 4 year old (turning 5 several weeks into the school year), but I don't think it will be beneficial for him to start that early. He is somewhat immature (although he does very well socially) and he is very small for his age. I never hear about parents that regret holding their kids back- I do, however, often hear parents that regret pushing their kids ahead.
Although it doesn't sound like your son is anywhere near a borderline bday, so I'm not sure why you would even consider holding him back?

My son wasnt ready but we were pressured into it. Now here we are struggeling thought the first grade and now talking about holding him back. He seems to do much better second semester as he matures. I would take a look at the situation and go from there. Good luck!

I'm going to wait and see . . . . My son will be 5yo in May 2013 and that fall will be the elementary's first switch to full day kindergarten. I'll ask his preschool teacher next spring what she things about his readiness, and take it from there. With a November birthday, I was always the youngest in my class, being the only one who couldn't drive until senior year in high school, so I'm not a fan of them starting too early. Right now, with him approaching 4yo, I can't imagine him being ready for full day kindergarten, but a lot can happen in a year+ time.

When looking at my 28 nephews and great nephews, any of them who started kindergarten younger than 6yo was held back in first grade, or had learning-delayed classes all thru school.

I've read a lot lately on parents holding their kids back a year to be better in sports, which I would never think of doing. I'm all about doing what's best for each kid. Good luck!

This is becoming a new debate these days. I really think it goes case by case, not a flat age. I think it would be as inconclusive to send a child automatically at 5 as it would be at 6.

First, will he be a young 5 or older 5? What's his maturity level like, shyness, academic readiness as in easy to learn or seems to take longer to learn and so on.

My two oldest sons are now 25 and 16. Their birthdays are in March and May. That put them at a mid-range 5 year olds and were individually ready or kindergarten emotionally and academically and did well in school.

With our triplets, they were born in early October. When it came to register for Kindergarten, the cut off date was October 1. The triplets were born October 7. We were told we could have them tested to see if they qualified for kindergarten. After discussing it we thought it was better to wait a year because they'd be very young 5s, actually starting school at 4. We felt that was too young.

On top of it they would graduated high school at 17. I graduated at 17 as I have a September birthday, and started school at 4. That was way too young to be cut loose in the world. My husband has a September birthday and he repeated 1st grade as he wasn't ready and was able to graduate at 18 which he felt was better for him. His sister had an August birthday and she repeated 1st grade as well as she wasn't ready either, and graduated at 18 and she feels it was better for her as well.

Needless to say, we waited another year, put the trio in preschool at age 5. Then for kindergarten they started school at 5 and then turned 6 a month later. Two of the triplets would have done fine started the year earlier as they're now at the top of their classes and reading a year ahead. One triplet needed to wait that extra year, but because they are triplets it was better that they all waited together.

With all of that said, each child is different, but with your son turning 5 this early I don't see that there would be a problem with him starting kindergarten this fall, unless you feel that he is not ready emotionally or academically. This is truly your call but unless there's a speicific reason at this point I would let him start in the fall. He won't be a young 5.

K. b
mom to 5 including triplets

My oldest son's birthday is July 21. I sent him to Kindergarten. He is young and little, but he was ready. I have a Master's degree in Education and I definitely do not believe "young boys" should be held back just because of their age! If they're not ready, then they're not ready. My son is now in 1st grade and consistently earns 100% on his AR tests (reading), spelling tests, and math timed tests . I have never regretted sending him on time.

Here are a couple of things to think about...your son is not really that young (June, July, August are typically considered 'young'). Also, fast forward 10-12 years...he will turn 16 his freshman year of high school and graduate a few months after he turns 19!

Here are a couple of good articles:

http://parenting.blogs.nytimes.com/2011/09/26/the-redshir...

http://www.nytimes.com/2011/09/25/opinion/sunday/dont-del...

My son missed the cut off by a couple of weeks and at the time I was upset that he couldn't go ahead and start...academically he was fine but, wow I had no idea about how important those social skills and emotional maturity really are...I believe expecially in boys.

He turned 6 a couple of weeks into Kinder and I was super glad I didn't have to make the decision to hold him back...knowing what I know now if I had a summer birthday 5, I would hold them back in a heartbeat.

The extra year in a two day a week pre-school program really helped him work out some of the social and emotional maturity...plus I got to have him home with me a whole year more (you will never get those days back again).

My son reads a grade level advanced and handles math a grade level advanced...and his teacher tells me he could probably be further than that, but he is still only 7 and still had some maturing to do in the classroom...what a disaster it would have been a year sooner.

When I taught high school the younger boys just did not do as well socially or maturity wise as their slightly older counderparts. Also do you want him to go to college at 18 almost 19...or 17 almost 18??

Does your son attend preschool? If so, I would ask his teacher what she thinks.

The cut-off here is late - Dec. 1st. My son's birthday is mid-November and he could have attended Kindergarten this year. However, based on our experience at school last year, I knew there was no way he was ready.

This year he is doing really well in pre-K, participating, starting to write his letters, just learning to read. His teacher says he will be more than ready in the fall. Many of the kids he will be going to kindergarten with will also turn 5 in the winter. He will be one of the older ones, but not by much. It's all up to the individual situation.

Our son turned 5 years old in June, and started kindergarten that fall. We were in the principals office the 1st week of school. First semester was just full of behavior issues. I told my husband if he is not academically on it we are pulling him out of school. Guess what he was right on it! Well shoot I thought what do we do now. One of the teachers said by 2nd semester he will ok. She stated its like it hits them all the sudden. I am wondering if it is age that helps them.

Depending on how your child matures is how I would look at sending him to school. Looking back I thought our son was ready, he had a hard time. If he is mature enough to want to learn send him, if he is still in the play time mode, consider holding him back. Best wishes to you!

I think this is very child-dependent. Some boys have shorter attention spans, and take a little longer to mature to where they can pay attention in school. Other boys mature faster and don't have this issue. My son's birthday is in June. I sent him when he turned 5. He is one of the youngest in his class, but it was OBVIOUS that he was really ready to go. He met all the academic readiness profiles - things like - he loved story time at preschool and had no problem sitting still and listening to the story and learning the preschool lesson. Plus since he had been in preschool we know he was good at making friends. So I had no hesitation about sending him, because he was ready both academically and socially. And, although he's still in elementary school, he is still doing well in school and has made lots of friends, plays sports, etc.

So I would bounce this back to you and ask - is there any reason why you think he might not be ready?

Cut off date for kindergarten birthdays back when I started was October 1. My birthday is October 17, so I missed that, and started later. 5, almost 6. I breezed through it all, all the way up until I found out what boys were in 6th grade. I graduated having no problems. There were some kids that were a whole year younger, and there were some that had October, November, December birthdays who were my age. It wasn't that big a deal at all to me. Some graduate high school at 17, some at 18. It's not overly rare and it never bothered me at all. I think the ONLY difference that came into play was when my classmates wanted me to buy alcohol for them from the gas stations (the drinking age back then was 18) and that made for awkward situations sometimes. But the drinking age is now 21 so that shouldn't be a problem, right? But seriously, I went to school and graduated with people and didn't know how old they were until a facebook post after a birthday says "36 wasn't bad" or whatever. We just took for granted everyone was about the same age. But that reminds me there WAS another time that age came into play as a student: the driver's license. And that didn't make me self conscious. It made me awesome, lol--I had a license a few months before some did.
My oldest son: the cut off age here is that you have to be 5 by Sept 30 but his birthday is Oct 20. So he didn't get to go to kindergarten this year. That was a little annoying, but I'm ok with it. Even though he's socially and mentally even (if not excelling the expectations for his age group), he's a little on the smaller side. I was like no fear, it's a little bit of a bummer that he won't go to school with our neighbor (just a few months older than him, and his friend), but he will go to school with his friend from soccer. He will be more mature and more able to follow directions and listen (especially since he's had me doing pre-k with him at home). He'll have some time to be a little bigger and more "even" with his classmates. I'm not sweating anything about it anymore, though I was a little annoyed when they told me he'd missed the cutoff date.
I disagree with a poster who said that it would hurt their self esteem and make them feel they can't do the work. I believe that would be the result of someone who wasn't educated enough at home AND who may have needed additional help in school, not just the simple being a year or so older than his classmates. So many parents seem to think that school is responsible for teaching their children to read, and I just don't think that's so at all. My son's education is going to be coming from school, yes....but also his PARENTS.

Well, I really think it depends on the individual kid. If he's turning 5 next week, he'll probably be plenty ready for kindergarten in August. If he's extremely immature, you may want to rethink it, but I would go ahead and send him. My oldest is in kindergarten this year and has a March birthday. He just turned 6 and started kindergarten last fall at 5.

I see people doing this more with kids who turn 5 a week before kindergarten starts, and I think there's benefit to that in may cases, but at their ages several months can make a huge difference!

The cut-off in our school district is 9/30. Our son was born 9/2, but we chose to wait to send him. My husband was pushing it...he's on the small side for a guy and said he was always the smallest in his class and he was teased for it and hated it and didn't want to put our son through it. We were also told about boys maturing later etc. Our son was truly ready for the academics (he was reading chapter books when he was 4), but there's so much more to school than just the academics.

He's now 15 and a freshman in high school and I think it was the right choice. He's highly intelligent, and in some ways mature beyond his age, but in others, he's been slow to mature. He's matured a ton in the past year and he can now keep up socially with the older kids he comes into contact with, but I don't think he could have in middle school.

I think waiting puts your child in a better position to be a leader. I know it did with our son.

Our son was bored in school through middle school, but I don't think sending him a year sooner would have done anything to make that go away. He's just not the kind of kid who wants to sit still and pay attention in class. (Yes, he has ADHD). However, now that he's in high school, he can take AP and Honors classes and be challenged academically.

All that said...it was the right decision for us for him. His sister was born in July, and at 12, is one of the youngest 7th graders in her class. She's physically behind the other girls, but she's self-confident and it doesn't bother her. She's not interested in the boys as are many of her peers, but she doesn't let that bother her either.

So...each child is different. Though...boys in our district are more likely to start school later than the girls. You've got to know your child, and make the decision that makes the most sense to you...and then don't look back.

Good luck!

my daughter starte K this year and turned 5 a few weeks after it started. The teacher said although she was eally bright you could tell she was the youngest, she was super shy, although I think thats J. her and was so shy and didnt want to be wrong it was hard to know what she knew. Shes excelling now and scored 98% on the tests the teacher said she couldnt reccomend holding her back and if she did they would laugh at her, BUT its our decision if we'd like to and I'm really giving it thought. You cant determine now how hard future years will be and it seems they have tons of extra things for smart kids, so I'm not worried she'll be bored. I'm really considering her repaeting K. I'd hold off and let them be little one mor eyear if I was you