Advice for 2 1/2 Year Old Who Won't Eat.

Updated on March 30, 2009
M.H. asks from Minneapolis, MN
8 answers

My son is 2 1/2 years old and he will not eat solid foods. He survives on Carnation Instant breakfast. He has huge issues with eating, and have not had success with a variety of interventions we have tried. We did feeding therapy for about 9 months, but there was no improvement. We have taken him to a chiropractor and a behavioral center and other professionals. He does "give in" and eat. So, if your child had eating issues like this, what helped? Do people just eat protein shakes instead of eat for their lifetime?

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K.H.

answers from Minneapolis on

cut off the carnation....hell get hungry....sounds like you just give into him....i know its hard...but he will come around.....

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C.D.

answers from Omaha on

You unabling your child to letting him choose what he wants not what he needs. While carnation instant breakfast is a healthy drink you need to stop this behavior now. Offer him a variety of foods but no instant breakfast. yes it is going to be hard on your nerves but you are the mother and you know that what he is doing is not good for him. Take the lead and keep firm. He will eat... humans will not allow themselves to starve themselves at this age. He may fight you but hang tight this too will pass.

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M.H.

answers from Minneapolis on

I would not give up on him eating real food. Carnation Instant Breakfast isn't nutritionally complete and is loaded with sugar. If you were going to give him a liquid diet there are more nutritional supplements out there, although I would keep trying to get him to eat. When he was evaluated did they consider sensory issues? I assume they ruled out any physical causes such as swallowing problems or digestive issues? It sounds like he did "give in" at least a little in the past so I would keep working on it. My son has gone through OT for sensory issues and is currently undergoing feeding therapy in the SE metro if you need the name of a provider you haven't already tried. How about trying to wean him off of the liquid diet gradually instead of going cold turkey? Start by taking it away for one meal of the day. Maybe start with the meal that seems least important to him or will be the least disruptive to your schedules if he self destructs when he doesn't get his Instant Breakfast. My son's issues aren't as severe as your son's issues and the progress from feeding therapy has been VERY gradual, but I have found it helpful to stick to my guns, to not give in and to have a 3rd party (his therapist) who is holding me accountable. My son is now 9 and his issues started at about age 2 (he was a wonderful eater until then) and I really wish I had dealt with it earlier. So from personal experience I would highly recommend you keep trying and get a handle on it sooner rather than later. Good luck!

I just wanted to add that my son had his therapy session this afternoon and I confirmed that his therapist has experience working with kids who have been on a liquid only diet if you want her name.

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K.E.

answers from Madison on

I have to say I agree with the others. Offer him what you want him to eat for breakfast and if he doesn't eat it, don't let him have anything else and offer it again to him for lunch, then supper, etc. Kids won't starve, may seem like it to us, but when they get hungry enough they will eat. I've done similar with my stubborn child, believe me, he doesn't starve.

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R.P.

answers from Minneapolis on

It sounds mean, but stop buying the instant breakfast. If you can take him throuhg the cupboards and show him that it simply isn't there eventually he will become hungry enough to try something else. My parents used this tactic on my sisters and I (all 7 of us). At mealtime, ask him to try different foods, at least 2 bites. If he truly doesn't like them, don't force it. Help him to find some part of the meal that he DOES like and stick with that. If he leaves the table tell him he needs to come finish now or that's all till...lunch, dinner...whatever is the next meal. This will probably be REALLY tough in the beginning, but he will learn that you are in charge and that he simply can't survive on instant breakfast.
Hope that helps!

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P.C.

answers from Bismarck on

What was involved with the feeding therapy? Did he have sensitivity issues? gag? weakness, etc. If those are the cause of his selective diet then I wouldn't give up on them yet. It can take time to impact feeding. Did you ever pursue sensory integration dysfunction as a possible cause? If you have truly ruled out all the oral motor and sensory integration reasons, then just letting him get hungry might do the trick but I'd want to be sure all I was dealing with was a stubborn toddler before I went that route.

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M.H.

answers from Dubuque on

My son had a sensory processing disorder and has had feeding problems in the past. Don't give up on offering food. But I would also suggest to not give the carnation. He will fill up on this and not want to eat. It is not a nutritionally complete drink and has a lot of sugars. I give my kids a nutritional drink once a day. One cup and they get the nutrients they need for the day including the DHA and Omega 3's but they don't get full on just drinking. I always offer a variety of food but my son with sensory still has difficulty with some foods and gags if I force it.
So I guess to sum up my opinion continue to offer food but don't make it a stressful situation (this can lead to other issues) and make sure he is getting the nutrition he needs.
If you want more info on the supplement I use I can pass that on.
If you have any questions or would like to chat I will share in more detail our experiences (my son is now 8)
Good Luck
Hugs
~M.
P.S. My son would never "give in" and eat he just flat out would not eat.

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L.D.

answers from Minneapolis on

It sounds like he has been evaluated and there is nothing wrong with him. Right? To me it sounds like he is just trying to be in control of the situation. You are probably forcing the issue to much.

You said you've tried every intervention you can think of. Have you tried "giving up". Seat your son at the table for meals and snacks. Offer him the same food everyone else is eating and leave it at that. No fighting no arguing. If he is hungry he will eat. You may want to limit his milk intake to 16-20oz a day. Chances are he is filling up on it and doesn't feel a need to eat other things. Establish an eating schedule (about every 2 hours offer meal or snack) and don't give him food or beverage in between.

I think you would find the book "How to get your child to eat but not too much" by Ellyn Satter extreamly helpful. That may not be the exact title but it's close. She has written many books on the subject of feeding kids.

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