My daughter is afraid of anything in a costume. She will absolutely refuse to go into a building if she thinks there is a chance there will be a costume there. She's afraid of most new situations and it will take alot of talking to get her to try going somewhere she hasn't been before. She refuses to take any medicine that isn't chewable or the meltaway kind. This one isn't fun because she tends to get bladder infections (very common in my family) and it's always a fight to get her to take any meds. She also doesn't like loud noises. She has gotten a little better about this one but still at times she covers her head in music class or runs to shut the door so she won't have to hear the vacuum cleaner. I just figured this was all anxiety type stuff and she would eventually grow out of it. Should I be worried or just keep thinking that it will pass as she gets older?
My daughter is similar to this, though she will go to chucky cheese. i tell the staff to stay away or not bring the costume out.
A friend tries to convince me it is autism or some senory integration disorder. Her teachers and doctor totally disagree and think she is projecting her own issues onto us. Watch out for that.
As my daughter ages, she gets better in each area.
Hi--
I'm going to offer you an alternative way to look at things. In Chinese medicine, the bladder represents fear (every organ is associated with an emotion), so it doesn't surprise me that she is very fearful and has bladder infections often.
A few things might help. Get her some Bach's Rescue remedy. It is a flower essence specifically designed to support the body in times of stress, and can be taken as often as needed (even every five minutes). They have it in dropper form or in pastilles (like a gummy). Also, make sure she is taking extra vitamin C and B complex to support her adrenal glands, as it sounds like she is out of balance. Next, try teaching her meditation to help her deal with her fears. There is a great guided visualization tape for children--check out stress free kids.com . Finally, check out her environment--are you or your husband under a great deal of stress? Children pick up on that and it can cause behavior like you are communicating to us. There are also some other alternative ways to deal with this--I am happy to discuss them further with you if you feel this is a route you are comfortable with.
Good luck,
J.
Poor girl:( A child therapist sounds like a good idea. Has she always been this fearful or did it start suddenly? The descriptions either sound like anxiety or posttraumatic type symptoms...like maybe she saw something (movie or event in her life) that scared her? Have you been able to talk with her about what's scaring her? Sometimes kids know but othertimes it's difficult for them to know themselves so a skilled child therapist might be a good idea. In the meantime lots of love and reassurances. Maybe ask her for some ideas about what makes her feel safest, why, and what you can do to help make her feel safe.
Best wishes:)
I have a 9 year old pretty typical kid and this seems very odd to me. I would talk to her pedi about anxiety. This doesn't sound typical at all to me.
1) Don't vacuum when she's at home.
2) Make sure she's drinking a LOT of water, every day.
3) See if there are any family therapists in your area
who have experience/competence with working with young children.
4) If music class is optional, ask that she be excused from attending,
at least for the time being.
If it's required, ask if she can be seated in the back of the room.
5) Did the costume situation come up recently?
Or has it been going on for a while.
Did something scary happen to her in the past
with someone(s) in costumes?
It sounds like it could be sensory related, but you should also know that many children with sensory disorders will also have comorbid anxiety. Take her to an Occupational therapist for an evaluation, and see a psychiatrist about the anxiety, because this is a very easily treated condition for most children. They cannot count on their sensory processing to tell them the truth (they perceive things in a very confusing way) and this can lead to anxiety. If you still see additional issues, seek out an evaluation from a developmental pediatrtrician.
With treatment, it will get better. I have one who was like this, she had a lot of OT, and vision therapy, and she was treated medically for the anxiety. She is doing so well now that no one would know.
M.
Because of her issue with noise I suggest that she may have a sensory processing disorder. Talk with her pediatrician about this possibility. I agree with AllyJ and Shira P about trying a child therapist, one who is experienced in anxiety issues and familiar with sensory processing disorders.
Honor her fears and don't try to talk her into or force her to experience their cause. It could be that just accepting them and not exposing her to the noise or costumed people will help her to relax a bit. If you keep insisting that she try to cope she will become even more anxious in defense of her feelings. A child therapist can talk with her and will have skills to help her overcome her fears.
I definitely would not wait in hopes that it will pass. What you describe seems extreme to me.
If it is anxiety it will not just get better, it seems to get worse if you can't find coping skills. Have you talked with her about her fears and maybe come up with solutions to help her. You may want to talk to her doctor and find a therapist. As one mom mentioned you might look up and ask about sensory issues. Good luck to you and your little girl.
