7 Year Old over Reacting to Minor Injuries?

Updated on April 04, 2008
K.L. asks from Lampe, MO
5 answers

My son is 7 years old. For the last year, or so, and in an escalating manner, he has been reacting in a very dramatic way to minor injuries. I'm talking about things like, stubbing his toe, biting his lip (no blood involved), hitting his elbow, etc... I consider myself to be an attentive mom. He gets lots of attention. We play games together, and have good open communication. I am starting to get annoyed by this behavior. Let me give you an example..
THUMP
Son:"OWWWW OOOHHH OOOWWW" (hobbles into living room)
Mom:"What happened"(voice thick with concern and sympathy)
Son:"I stubbed my tooooeeee! OOWWW OOHHH OOOHHH OOOOOOOOOO! It was like thiiisss" (mimicks stubbing his toe on chair leg)"It feels like my toe got ripped oooofff!"
Mom:"Do you need some ice?"
Son:"NOOOO!"
Mom:"Well it's a good thing you're a tough boy!"
Son:(hops out of room holding injured foot)"OOOHH! OOWWW!"
Five minutes later all is forgotten.
This is just a general idea of what happens on average 3-5 times a night in my home. I hope you don't think I am a cold, uncaring mom because I truly love my son and I always make sure he is not seriously injured. I also understand that different people have different ways of dealing with pain. I am not doubting the fact that it does hurt. The behavior I would like to see end is the continuous howling, and re-enacting of the painful experience. I have told him that it is not necessary to re-enact the moment for me, I have tried over sympathizing, I have tried ignoring it, I have tried encouraging him to be tough (like a coach might do). Does anyone else have a similar problem? Am I being too unrealistic in my expectation of him to tough it out, walk it off, etc... I feel like I need to give a little side note. Last year my son took an accidental blow to the head with a baseball bat resulting in 6 stitches directly above his eyebrow. He did not shed a tear! We went straight to the ER, he was so extremely tough, the Dr was very impressed, we told him how proud we were...all that good stuff. It seems like he can be very tough when other people are around, but if it's just the family at home, we get major drama! I'm afraid I am handling this all wrong. He is a very bright kid, he has no other discipline/behavior issues. I don't want this behavior to keep getting worse. Any suggestions, or similar situations out there?

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So What Happened?

Thanks to everyone for the advice. I actually sat my son down and had a talk about this. I asked him if he was not getting enough attention from me. He did say he would like to play more games together, so we've been pulling out some old board games when we get a chance. I explained how sometimes things hurt but we have to just grit our teeth and be tough. That's it's OK to say Ouch, but the dramatics need to stop. He's actually done pretty well with this. That, and I told him I was going to start kissing his "owies" again, like I do for his little sister who's almost 2, I think that had the greatest effect!

More Answers

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K.L.

answers from Oklahoma City on

I don't think you atre being too hard on him because he is a boy. I am not saying just make him tough out everything, but i understand where you are coming from because i have a son that is amost 4 and he toughs out everything now but he just started that about a year ago and my middle child still over re-acts like you son does but ia m getting her out of that. I know why she does it though. She does taht because her little brother annoys her so much that if he bare ky touches her she will fake crying to see if he will get in trouble or if i make him com eout of their room and sit down with me or something. Is he the only child?

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B.H.

answers from Oklahoma City on

Sounds like he just wants attention to me. Kids do the weirdest things to get it sometimes.

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K.P.

answers from Huntsville on

Well, my boys couldn't get any more attention and they do that a lot. I usually just completely ignore them and brush them off (when I know they're not in real pain, and I rarely do it to my 2/3yr old son). Usually when they see their not getting any response from me at all whatsoever, they stop and get distracted by something else. It's definitely an attention thing and even the kids with 24/7 attention do it...Kids just crave attention no matter how much they're getting, so just kiss him, blow him off, and give him positive attention when he's not acting like a drama king in negative ways.

K.
SAHM of 4 (9mos-6yrs)

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T.S.

answers from Little Rock on

Oh yesterday my 8 year old daughter started to yell every time that she moved her arm. She had fallen the day before and may have landed wrong on the wrist. She was having a fit until I took her to my mom (she is a nurse) and she looked at it and told her that she was just going to have to cut it off. I thought later in the day how after we visited with my mom that I did not hear about it again. So yes I have that with her and my son (5 almost 6) is just as dramatic and oh yes my 2 almost 3 year old daughter is the same way. So I guess that if your son has a problem that so are my kids. I just tell mine that they are fine if there is no blood. When I think back I think of the time about a year ago that my husband and oldest were out riding bikes and they had a bad accident. Luckly not far from the house. My daughter landed on her face. I do not remember hearing her cry at all. Not until we started to clean it up. Maybe it is the real trama of the incident that sends them in to quite. Don't know but you are not alone.

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M.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

He is just getting your attention. He knows you will react when he is "hurt". Just give him some positive attention everyday. He will grow out of this. Boys can be drama kings too. Best of luck.

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