I am the proud mother of 2 sons. A 4yr old (as of Feb 22) and a 15 month old. Our 4 year old was doing extremely well keeping his pull ups dry and he loved sitting on the potty and soon graduated to the toilet at around 3 yrs old...I thought we were doing great and as I was preparing to deliver our second son I thought that by the time I went back to work after my maternity leave he would be in big boy underwear and we would only have to by diapers for the baby. Well, I couldn't have been more wrong. At our son's (home)daycare, there are four 4 yr old boys (including my son) and a 2 yr old little boy who loves to play with the big boys. the 2 yr old was in big boy underwear first. Then one by one all of the others followed, of course our son is now the last. I've tried everything. I've tried the reward system...we have a "potty board" on our fridge with the days of the week. He gets a sticker each time he goes to the toilet, when he poops he gets 3 stickers for his board...if he keeps that up for the whole week and does really well, he gets to pick out 3 toys at the $1.00 store. Well, we've never made it to the $1.00 store. I've tried being indifferent...well if you don't want to go, you'll be wet. nobody wants to be wet, right? He doesn't mind being wet. I've tried pulling him up the stairs with him crying the whole way that he wants to keep playing with his brother, or watch his cartoons or hanging out with Daddy. I've bought him big boy underwear, which he wears on the weekends, and keeps dry...I've tried yelling, not yelling, asking him, to demanding him. His father and I are fresh out of ideas and we need HELP!!!
Ladies, ladies, ladies. Thank you so much for your responses. we did exactly what 99% of you all suggested. Just put him in big boy underwear!!! He did so well all weekend. he stayed totally dry!!! i have to admit, i did put him in a pull up during nap time, and he did wake up wet, but other than that he did so well. we ran errands on saturday and i forgot he had underwear on, and he gave me this funny face from his car seat and i was like, uh oh...where's the bathroom?!!?? and he made it...yay!!! so today's the first day at daycare with underwear (our daycare provider was completely onboard. she's more than ready to have him on the toliet, also). i can't wait to see how he did!!! thank you, ladies. this is the first time i've used this site and it will not be the last. i really appreciate everyone who responded.
stay tuned, i have a 15 month old, also who i'm sure will have his own quirky issues to write in about.
thanks, again.
B..
I also vote for only having him in underwear from now on! Throw out the pull-ups and just go for it...I bet it will be easier than you think...
simple solution.. put the boy in underwear.. my daughter peed in pull ups.. she called them panty diapers..
I put her in cotton pants.. and she had 3 accidents.. pee ran down her leg and she didnt like that..no more accidents..
he obviously has pretty good control if he can stay dry.. put him in underwear.. pull ups are a waste of money...
Just put him in big boy underwear and stop making such a big deal out of it. He is likely making this into a power struggle. The only way to stop it is not to participate.
Hi B.,
Sounds to me like he's potty-trained. Serious. He lives up to your expectations perfectly on the weekends and does great in underpants.
There should be no different expectations during the week.
Go for it :)
t
Have you tried disciplining him? At 4 yrs of age he know exactly what he's doing. It's a control issue clearly! I would set the limits with him and give him boundries for what is and isn't acceptable and stick to it. For example, if he pees his pants then he goes to time out or get something meaningful taken away. With this I would also use the potty chart for rewards. You might have to take away toys or play time. Also, when he wets his underwear, let him stay wet! It will get uncomfortable eventually! Good luck! I know it's not easy!
Tell your daycare provider that you're going to be putting him in just underwear and hopefully he'll stay dry all day there just like he does for you on the weekends. I'm sure she'll appreciate having the heads-up. :)
My kids would all potty in their pullups, but did well when in underwear. I only use the pull-ups at night until I know they can stay dry all night. It's nice to not have that expense coming out every month! We've been buying diapers/pull-ups for 6 1/2 years and very much looking forward to our almost 3 yr old being done with pull-ups...it's already nice only having 1 in diapers and even nicer only having to buy pull-ups for night time!
Put him in underwear. Only do the pull-ups at night if you absolutely have to. He's probably regressing somewhat because of the baby being in the house, and he knows it bothers you. Don't yell or get upset, but do have him help you clean it up when he makes a mess. Give him the baby wipes and have him wipe himself. It probably won't take too long for him to realize that just going to the potty is a whole lot easier. I also recommend the book, "Pocket Idiot's Guide Potty Training Problems- A praise based program for reluctant toddlers" by Dr. Alison Schonwald and George Sheldon. We used that book and "The Potty Training Answer Book" by Karen Deerwester. I think the first book will serve you the best. Good luck! Don't give up- he'll get it. I think he already does, but he's trying to keep the control in his court.
Just love him. Trust that he is doing the best that he knows how to do. Take a look at why you are wanting him to change, and do your best to resolve your own frustration. When it becomes a non-issue for you, then he can take charge of it.
Just put him in underwear. We had the same problem with our son until we asked hium why he was going in his pullup. He said "because I can". We put him in underwear & never had an accident.
