My 4-year old daughter has been pretty much toilet trained for about a year. However, she still wets the bed sometimes. Now, here's the trick. I travel for work so I am gone about 2 weeks a month. During that time, she has no bed wetting for her Dad. But when I get home, it's like clockwork, she will start having "accidents" in the middle of the night.
Last week, grandma came to stay with her while Dad and I went on a trip. No accidents for grandma. But we got home and BAM that night she wet the bed.
Is it me?
Anyone else have this issues?
How do you react when she has an accident vs how Dad and Grandma react? I would start letting DAD handle all accidents. She could be trying to get attention from you. If Dad is the one she sees, it won't be such a novelty anymore, and hopefully she will stop. Good luck!
Maybe she sleeps more soundly when you're at home!
I think it is probably more coincidental than seletive at this time. It is not uncommon that 4-year olds who are fully potty trained still have random bedwetting incidents during this time and they will for another year or so until their bladder is fully formed and they are able to wake themselves up to get the bathroom when they feel the urge in the middle of the night.
It's possible that she maybe sleeping more soundly when you are at home and so, is not getting herself to the bathroom when she needs to in the middle of the night when you are there. It's also possible that she may be consuming a more liquids before bedtime when you are at home and not going to the bathroom that one last final time before bed also. Those two scenarios are equally as likely. But I do know that both of my children were known to have random bedwetting incidents when they were 4 and 5-years old. It's just par for the course.
She may be sleeping deeper when you are at home, therefor bed wetting happens. My daughter, 4 1/2 years old, still is not potty trained at night because she falls into a deep sleep and does not wake up yet at night. So I really do not think that there is any issue, as she gets older this will not happen (by age 7, I am told).
Maybe she is more comfortable when you are home so she sleeps deeper.
I really don't believe she is wetting the bed on purpose. It may have something to do with you, however, but it's nothing you are doing wrong. She likely sleeps most soundly when you are home.
My daughter was trained by age 2 but continued to wet at night. The frequency has gradually decreased until she had maybe 2 or 3 wet nights during age 8. She has been much more likely to wet on the nights she is with me than the nights she is with her Dad (we have an equal number of nights with her).
I do believe my daughter sleeps more soundly at my home. At dad's home, they have cats, a dog, and her dad snores so loudly the whole house hears it. And dad is different than mom, in many ways.
Your daughter will grow out of this, but be patient, because age 7 or 8 is common before kids stop wetting at night.
In one of my parenting classes we are talking about behavior and changing behavior. . .and the three main reasons for behavior (good or bad) is attention seeking, control, and revenge.
It sounds like to me that because you travel for long periods of time and she wets when you are back home, that it is attention seeking. I would explore if this might be a possibility in your situation. Is there a way that you can somehow give her more of your attention during the day and add in some conversations where you acknowledge her possible thoughts. Like "It is hard when mommy is gone and you want to spend more time with me. I miss you too while I am gone. What can we do together today."
Every situation is totally different and it might just be a coincidence, but your absences may be the trigger. She may need you to help her express her feelings to you.
Good luck.
E.
Hmm. What's different in her routine when you are home?
Bed wetting is common till sometimes 7 yrs old or older, but it's weird it only happens when you are home.
It's it possible Dad/Grandma puts her in Pull Ups while you are away?
