4 Year Old Having Regular Potty Accidents

I understand the frustration, my 3 year old once in a while has accidents at night. But I don't puish him for them, they are accidents! I personally think, you're being a little harsh on her. Please by all means don't take that the wrong way. Remember, children will react on what gets us angry the most. My 3 year old will scream and be nasty and have a bad attitude I used to get so angry with him and scream and yell and take things from him. Finally I started to ignore him and it's worked like a charm. She may be trying to get attention from you. And since she's crying after she pees it's because she knows she's going to get into a lot of trouble. Kids will regress on potty training when they're forced into it. I wanted to force my son so bad because he was almost 3 and still wearing diapers. Once he said no more diapers, that was it and I slowly introduced the potty training. I'm sure you're first one was a breeze, every child is different.
I would really recommend, that you cut back on her fluid intake too. And about every hour or so, remind her hey, do you have to pee. I have to remind mine because he will hold it and it's not good for them. Take it slowly with her, like she's just starting out again. And just keep reminding her let's take a potty brake.

Another possible medical reason for this is actually significant constipation. Any sign of that or did your pediatrician check for that? I don't remember the details (can probably Google it), but there's an anatomical explanation for why constipation can cause urine leakage and accidents. If there is no medical explanation for it and she doesn't do it at school or at night I suspect she's gotten used to the negative attention and you should just back off. Try calmly cleaning her up without excitement or punishment and maybe have her help. You mention you've tried ignoring it, but for how long? It can take several weeks to change a habit or get used to a new routine. I had to use the "back off" method to train my oldest son to poop in the toilet (at almost age 4) and it was done with professional advice. Good luck.

My suggestion: Make it a non-issue. Do not say anything else about it. When she has accidents say 'lets get you cleaned up' quickly and quietly get her changed and then go about your business...I dare say even hold back on the eye contact while changing her.

I think there is a lot of stress surrounding it now. The best bet would be to take it all away and wait for a good long time...you have been dealing with it for so long now anyway, it shouldn't matter how much more time you spend on fixing it, right? No more rewards, no more punishments, no more praise, no more nothing!

So absolutely no more talking about it! Of course still remind her to go potty before you leave the house and before she goes to bed but leave all the rest of it up to her. The fact that she doesn't have accidents in school tells me she can do it...just back off and let her do it on her own now.

Good Luck!

Tell her calmly that she is old enough to not pee on herself, she has shown you this because she doesn't at school or at night, (which is why i don't think it's constipation, that would bother her regardless of if it was night or home or school) and that from here on out she will clean herself up when she has an accident.

This advice was given by a pediatrician: Make her "own" it, it will be her responsibility to take off her bottoms, wash them in the sink (there's a great soap called Zote, it is a pink bar) get in the shower to wash up (the longer the process takes her the better) and put on clean clothing, Don''t yell at her, (not saying you do) as a matter of fact walk away and allow her to take care of things. Also use the pretty underwear as an incentive for when she stops having these "accidents," for now put her in plain white training panties. Pretty soon she should see that the accidents are taking her away from doing things she'd rather do.

Hang in there for as long as it takes, and do not show frustration!