3.5 Yr Old Bitting Mom N Dad Also Toys.. on Spectrum

Typical kids often bite at this stage. I suggest you protect yourself while telling him that hurts and give him an immediate consequence. What consequences do you use for discipline? My daughter has 3 kids on the spectrum. She puts them or sends them to their room until they can be safe. Sometimes they play and come out when they've calmed down. She doesn't always comment on why they had to go to their room. Sometimes she does. If she says something and they are still upset the go back into their room.

The reason for being in the room is to reinforce safety. They can play, watch TV or cry. Staying in the room is the entire consequence.

Some kids do bite until they are 4 or 5 years old - even kids not on the spectrum. They don't fully understand that biting is so much worse than hitting or kicking, but adults do and tend to be more upset about biting. That's not completely fair to the child who bites (assuming they understand the severity of their actions). I'm not saying it's ok to bite. I'm just saying, it's important for you to realize that your son doesn't understand biting the way you do.

I absolutely agree with Marda that you need to have very consistent, clear and immediate consequences. You need to make it absolutely clear that biting will not be tolerated.

It will really help if you could identify when or why your son bites. Is it when he doesn't get what he wants? Is it when he's frustrated? Is it when he's tired or hungry? Pay very close attention and start to take notes on the circumstances each time he bites. If you can determine the most likely times or situations, you might be able to stop him before it happens. The more you are able to do that, the faster he will learn other coping skills.

I'm not sure if he's biting you in a mean way or just biting. If "just biting," you can buy autism chews or chewies for sensory issues. I would also look into ABA therapy, if he is not involved with that already.

Is he biting because he's teething or biting in frustration?
If he's teething, give him lots of cold stuff to bit on.
If it's out of frustration, then you need to talk with his therapist about ways to develop better communication with him (baby sign language if he's not verbal, etc).

Biting is typical at this age, regardless of autism. Teething is always a possibility as well.

Communication problems is often a big part of it. Of course, reprimand him (no biting, biting hurts!), BUT do your best to figure out WHY it's happening. Is there a pattern? Does it happen at certain times of day, around certain activities or people, etc. He may qualify for early intervention, so look into that and get the support you can. If communication is an issue, find whatever works best for him - speech, sign language, computer interface - don't just focus on speech - it's COMMUNICATION that's needed and sometimes speech is the hardest.

visit www.autistikids.com - you may be able to find resources there - it's a site of blog links to people on the autism spectrum who share their stories and experiences.