i recently got out of a long term relationship almost a yr ago i am now in a relationship with a wonderful guy but he is 21 and i am 30 first off he doesnt act 2 1 at all when i first met him i thought he was like 26 until we got to talking and i found out he was 21 we have been seeing each other now for 6 months and we now live together my 2 children love him and he loves my kids and he is very gd with them at first i put off being with him cause of his age but we just hit it off like we have known each other for ever we love each other very much we have alot of things in common my parents like him and his family likes me his parents have even taken to my kids and treat them as if they were one of their own grandkids my question is is it wrong for me to want to be this guy who is 9 yrs younger than me even though he is the guy i could see myself with for the rest of my life or should i end it just because of the age difference
No, you should be with whom ever makes you happy. Would you question it if he was 9 years older? Sounds like a good guy. Be Happy!
Ashton and Demi worked it out so can you!!
Love is what matters he is older than 18 so he is legal to date..It's really hard to find someone to love and accept you and your kids as a package so go for it...
Hi there! I just wanted to reassure you that age truly is just a number. My parents divorced when I was young, and my mom started dating when I was a teenager. She was 35 and fell in love - he was 23. He never acted 23 - he looked/acted older than he was. She married that man and he became my step-dad, and the only real dad I've ever really had. He's only 10 years older than ME, but it's never been awkward or felt weird, he just fit right in with the family and became part of it. We don't even think about the age thing until someone mentions it. It's hard enough to find someone you are truly compatible with and who you love and loves you - don't let the age difference bother you, that's my opinion! Good luck - take care!
peace, J.
I have some friends who have been married for around 15 years. They are still very happy together. He is 12 years younger than she is. It can work. Don't worry about the age. Also, my husband is 16 years older than I am. I know it't not the same as a girl being older than the guy, but just wanted to let you know that age doesn't matter. If you love each other, that is what counts.
Hey M.,
My husband and I are 9 years apart. We met when I was 19 and he was 28. We hit it off then, but we lost touch with each other only a few months after we met, when I left to boot camp for the Marines, and then was stationed in Japan for several years. For 10 years, I never forgot what a wonderful closeness I felt with him, and no one I met in those 10 years, ever made me feel like he did. As it happened, I moved back to my home town (10 yrs later) and bumped into the same mutual friend who had introduced us 10 yrs before. We were brought back together by that same friend (him with an 11 yr old daughter and me with a 1 yr old daughter). We will have been together now 3 yrs this month, and married for 2 yrs, also this month. I moved in with him only 1 month after we started seeing each other again, and were married one year later, and then had our first daughter together the following month (in April). He has been raising my daughter since she was 1 ½ (she’ll be 5 in July), we have an almost 2 yr old, and now have our second daughter together (4 ½ mos) with plans for another (in 3 more yrs). I’ve never been happier, and he tells me that I have made him happier than he’s ever been. And if that isn’t enough, my husband is from a different nationality than mine, and my family wasn’t initially accepting at first, but our happiness, and our kids, have brought both of our families together and all “racism” or “discrimination” that there might have been, no longer exists. His family and mine love us both, and all of our kids (blood-related or not). It is a true testament of “age doesn’t matter”. Be happy, for you. :o)
M.
You can be happy. I wouldn't break up with him just based on the age difference since you're both legal adults. Since you have two young children AND because you've only known him for 6 months, I wouldn't move in with him until you're certain you want to marry him... and try not to think in terms of partnering with him "for the rest of your life" just yet. Be happy, be in love, but be cautious.
Age? who cares? When you introduce him to someone do you say.. Hi this is John and he's only 21, is that ok? Don't worry about it. My husband is six years younger than me and if you ask our friends, he is the older one lol. Enjoy your time together :)
Chronological age does not matter as much as emotional maturity. I'd say to enjoy the relationship and what it has to offer, but to exercise restraint when it comes to melding him into your family. What's the hurry? What will change or more importantly, what will you lose if you take your time? What's most important is the emotional welfare of your children and yourself, if he cannot wait for that, then I'd say he doesn't have his priorities right.
Also, I'd ask you, or anyone else, is partnering with someone in a model nuclear family that important for you now? Are you happy as a single mother at present? Can you keep this as a relationship that you have with him, with the kids knowing him as your friend or S.O., without any further movement forward?
My only concern would be the financial capacity and emotional growth of someone at 21 and their readiness to enter into an already established, mature household.
I know I seem like a wet blanket, but I'm a realist. Enjoy what you have with him now, but I'd recommend not to hurry on big committments with him.
Um, I guess I don't see a problem here! If everyone is happy, what does age matter? Good luck to you!
I don't know Demi.......ask Ashtin!! Good for you!
Stay with him, age shouldn't matter. I agree that you shouldn't rush into things though, especially since you have children. Take things slow and enjoy your growing relationship!
