3 Year Old Doesn't Go to Sleep at Night

Hi. I would put the 3 yr old to bed 30 min before her sister, to be fair to her sister (7:30pm) and let her read, or/ in bed. If she gets up out of bed, just lead her back each time until she gets it that getting up will not be rewarded at all (no talking to her or anything as you lead her by the hand back to bed). This should solve the dilemna, which you want solved before the baby is born.

Some might say its horrible but I put a movie (Disney or something wholesome) on to promote being still so their bodies can shut down for the night. It has worked for my son and takes the aggravation out of bed time?? Good luck hope you find something that works for you!

I would take out all her toys and have nothing for her to play with. A bedroom is for sleeping and not playing is my rule for my kids-until they are older and can understand the difference. My children have a seperate play room and the only thing I have in their room is a reading corner. Maybe try read to her at night before bed-maybe 3-4 stories and this will help settle her down before bed. i hope this bit of insite helps. Sometimes what works for some kids doesn't work for others. good luck.

Hi,
Try using some gentle relaxing essential oils on her feet before bed. Go to www.youngliving.com and you can purchase either: Lavender, roman chamomile, or peace and calming. I have seen the best results with roman chamomile.
Put a few drops on her feet at bedtime as well as have her breathe some of the oil in from her palms. It will help to relax her nervous system so that she can sleep. At least try it nightly for a couple of weeks.
Good luck,
C. Tanaka, DC
www.naturallifechiro.com

I was the oldest of four and I hated this when I was younger, but my mom used to let my younger siblings (who didn't have school) stay up later. Like I said, it wasn't a huge hit with me, but I don't remember making a huge fuss about it. Also, just camp out by her door for a night or too and when you hear her up, go in and wordlessly put her back to bed. Other than that, I don't know what to tell you. I know that when I was young (a little older than 3, but not much) I NEVER went to sleep when my mom put me to bed. I used to hide books under my pillow, and after my mom went downstairs (she left the hall light on until she went to bed) I would read in bed. Or during the time when I shared a room with my brother we used to play. And, of course, I was little, but I don't remember it ever affecting us adversely. I should ask my mom about that... If the issue is that your older child is in school and isn't getting enough sleep you may want to consider moving the middle one in with the youngest- they can both sleep later if disrupted during the night.

I too am a mom of 3 girls. my girls get a second wind around 7pm and go running through the house teasing and hitting each other while the dog chases them barking his head off. They don't want to brush their teeth or put pjs on or clean up before having to go up stairs to bed. so I was dealing with this almost every night. so my husband and I have split them up going into different rooms to do a night time ritual of reading or watching a short movie or talking about our day and what we plan to do for the(week,month,next day,vacation)and we tell them if the house is dirty or they don't go to sleep we can't do all the fun things that are to come. then we tuck each one of them in turn on their ceiling fans and a clock radio and walk out of the room and that has worked so far. I go back and turn off the ceiling fans after their asleep. I hate wasted electricty. if you make it a big deal so will they so just work on keeping it simple and consistent!

My suggestion is to give her a warm bath before bed. Read her a story of her choice. You could also rub her back too and that might calm her down. Hope these suggestions help.

C.

My 3-year-old doesn't often want to go to sleep either, but I find if she gets a lot of exercise during the day, it helps. Take her to the park and let her run like crazy, have races in the front yard, etc. The other day I walked with the stroller to my uncle's house about a half a mile down the street and she ran almost the whole way back. Slept like a log!

Hi T.,

No naps and still can't sleep at night? Then she must be sleeping in late in the morning...
Her biological clock is set for night time, try to teach her breathing exercises, where she just thinks of her deep breathing and lay with her for a while or read her a story in a very hushed tone.

Good luck,

V.

T.,
When I was a young child, I shared a room with my sister. She always fell asleep, I could not do so. My parents let me sing quietly to myself until I tired out. But a loud TV did bother me. I still prefer sleeping in a quiet, and sometimes dark room. Light effected me, and kept me awake. I also walked in my sleep according to my family. I played very hard during the day, but that did not help me sleep. My husband will tell you that I love to sleep now.

My mother also tried changing my eating and bath pattern too, but it didn't work. I truly could not go to sleep. I wasn't trying to stay up.

I still like to stay up late, but I do get more sleep when I can. Sleeping in is a pleasure now, and taking naps started in my teens, which I still do if I am home.

So, don't give up. You might have to move your daughter away from a wall that has the sounds of a TV or stereo coming into her room. Tell your other daughter to roll over and try to ignore her sister. I use to try to keep my sister awake because I was envious of her being able to go to sleep so easily. It didn't work, and she started going directly to sleep. Oh yes, sometimes she would sing one song with me.

I hope this helps you in someway.

E.:)

My 3 year old does the same thing.. During the day, I took all the toys and books our of her room.. I did it that way so it wasn't a huge fight at bedtime..I can't say that it TOTALLY worked, but.. It helped some.. Plus, we will typically read a story or two before she falls asleep..

Good luck!

Hi T.,
I only have one child but I have had trouble getting him to sleep. I read through the responses and I think letting your 3 year old go to sleep in another room might help then transfer her to her room. I do this with my son.

If this is not an option, getting a white noise machine may help relax her in her own room and help her sleep.

You may also want to try a sticker chart as incentive to be calm and go to sleep. You can give her a sticker for each night she goes right to sleep without bothering her sister. After she gets 10 stickers she gets a small present or treat. If you do this for a few weeks it should get her in the habit of going right to sleep. I've done this with my son with potty training and other things and after about a month he was fine and we didn't need to do it anymore.

I hope this helps.

Good luck!

L.

Hi T.,
Try putting your 3 yr old to sleep earlier at night before your other older daughter, say at 7pm. Try to stick to a bedtime ritual so she knows this is her specific bedtime and stick to that schedule and rules. Example, 5PM-5:30PM dinner, 5:45PM-6:15PM play time, 6:30PM bath and PJ's, 6:45 PM bedtime and story, 7pm lights out-sleep. Tell her you will check in with her again in 15 minutes to make sure she is sleeping and not playing. Be firm with her that playing with toys is not allowed at this time. Start checking in after 10 mins and then 15 mins after that, etc. Gradually, you can eliminate these check ins and she/he should be able to fall asleep on their own. Babies and toddlers are different than adults in their sleep cycle. When babies/toddlers don't get enough sleep their cortisol level surges and they get more revved up. There is a window when your child can fall asleep and if they pass that time frame, they get overstimulated and cranky and can't fall asleep. It sounds like your toddler isn't getting enough sleep and is overstimulated. Try not exposing her to tv or music (except relaxing or classical music)1-2 hrs before bed. Check out Jill Spivak's book The Sleepeasy Solution and her website at www.sleepyplanet.com. They also have eating/sleeping schedule examples for baby/toddler age groups. Her book is worth every penny! I am a first time mom w/ G/G twins who are now 1 yrs old, and ever since I got them on a sleep schedule (at 6 months old), my sanity has returned (LOL).
Best,
E.

this sounds familiar, my DD did the same thing before my DS was born. She might be already showing signs of rivalry with your unborn son. Right now, she is your baby. Soon a new baby will be here and being a middle child, she will feel lost among your kids. Try spending some alone time with her just before bed. Try teaching her the responsibility of going to bed and not disturbing the other kids. Once my DS moved from our bed to his crib (in my DD room) she started to do it again. We are getting him used to sleeping through the night before teaching her the importance of sleeping in her own bed in the same room.

Is it possible for you to change around the sleeping arrangements? Maybe you can have the 3 year old fall asleep in your room (when there is nobody else in there) and the younger one can share a room with the older. It seems like you are giving your three year old some entertainment at a time that is not appropriate. Try taking away all of the options for fun (including her sister) and see if that works. Good luck.

Discipline, discipline, discipline, in all the e-mails I get from moms who's children won't do what they are supossed to do, everything but discipline has been tried. If your 3 year old n playing when she is supposed to be in bed,what ever she is playing with take it away, and keep doing that until she has nothing left, then if and when she starts doing better, then give her one thing back at a time, if she relaps start the process over again, but for no reason accept flat out disobedience. J.