3 1/2 Yr Old Still Won’t Poop in the Toilet.

My dd had the same problem and I found out this is very common because they feel like a piece of themselves is falling out.
I put the pull ups on the back of the toilet, I had my dd put them on herself to go. I would help her take them off.
I also put a bag of toys on the back of the toilet (I wrapped them - just little trinkets). I told her when she pooped in the toilet, she would get a toy every time.
Finally she went and got the rewards until they ran out.

my now 18 year old son was afraid to poop after holding it. We are very lucky that we caught it in time and Encopresis did NOT happen. If children hold their bowel movements, it can cause a problem in the rectal area.

My son was afraid to poop because of one time he was constipated and it HURT REALLY BAD for him to poop.

She's 4 - not 2. She doesn't have any developmental delays, right? If not, then she needs to VERBALIZE her issue and state why she can't or won't poop in the toilet.

i'd let her have all the pullups she wants (never create a battle over this sort of thing) and i wouldn't make it a big deal.
i WOULD offer a reward in this particular instance, though. i don't agree with rewards for most behavioral issues, but something like this, which probably involves overcoming a fear, is different.
khairete
S.

My son was the same way. He was potty trained when he was 2.5 when it came to urinating but just wouldn't poop in the toilet. It was because one of his first experiences with pooping in the toilet was painful, and he associated that pain with the toilet and remembered it.

We finally gave him a bunch of high fiber foods and liquids and told him that if he pooped in the toilet we would buy him the truck he really wanted. He agreed, so when we saw that he was ready to poop we rushed him to the toilet and then headed to the toy story. Because that experience wasn't painful he stopped refusing to do it.

It also might be good to show her the best position to be in when she poops. This will mean that she needs to have her feet on a stool when she sits on the toilet.

Maybe her mom can help get her more interested in using it.
Our son at that age still felt he had to be with me everywhere - bathroom included.
So I let him flush for me and told him when he could use the toilet then he could flush then too.
It could be your neighbors little girls prefers squatting to go - which is hard to do on a toilet.
A foot stool might help her a lot.
It's still 5 months till she's 4yrs old - a lot can happen in that time and while some girls train earlier, she isn't on the late side either.

Did she ever go on an actual potty, so she can see it, and then when she's ready, she dumps it in the toilet? That's what mine did. No hoopla, no fuss, but they are ok with poop going down the toilet.

I would think if she's asking for a pull up she doesn't like the whole into the toilet it goes experience. Mine were only ready to use the toilet (potty seat on toilet) after 6 months or so on the potty.