We have a 2.5 year old little girl and 2 little dogs and 2 cats and as if that isn't enough we are taking care of my best friends little dogs while she works in Europe. Our little girl has always known this situation with all the pets, we will have my bf dogs for another year (she has a 3 year stint in Europe). So the problem is not that the her 2 dogs are new to our house. Everyday without fail, we have to tell her to stop chasing the dogs or the cats, she is relentless in her pursuit of them. She does not hurt them, although when the dogs are on the sofa she will sometimes slaps her hands down to get them to wake up and she laughs and last night she did throw a book on the floor in front of one them but not at the dog, just right in front of her. We have tried time out, reasoning, diversion, removing the dogs from the room and yet she persists. My husband and I are exhausted form trying to get her to leave the pets alone. Does anyone, know why this is happening, what we could do about it, is she going to grow out of this phase, is it going to get worse? I am a stay at home mom and she gets plenty of attention from dad at night too.
I just wanted to thank everyone for their help with the pet issue, please keep the support coming. It is really good to know that I am not alone and that this might in some ways be normal and that she might out grow it. I was seriously thinking that we needed professional help of some kind with this issue, although I don't know who we could call. I will say that she is not mean to them by touching or pulling on them. The little dogs we have would never bite (well, I guess say never) and one of the cats would not and the other cat might and has once but it did not deter her. So it is up to us to somehow make her stop and teach her to pet and be nice, I am just really tired of saying stop chasing the dogs and cats.
Rather than removing the dogs from the room, have you tried removing your daughter? She doesn't "get" that HER behavior has consequences for HER. And it is hard for her to learn this at her age...
SHE needs to get the consequence... not the dogs.
Just a thought.
She is probably doing it because of the reaction she gets from the animals...AND from you!! It is a "game" to her. She is old enough for you to talk to her and explain that she is scaring the animals...and making them afraid of her. Bring her over to the animals and encourage her to pet the animals with "gentle touches" and talk to her about using soft voices and being kind to the animals. Approach it from a "feelings" angle....how it is making the dogs and cats feel and how much more they will love her if she is kind to them. Approach it in the same way that you would if she was doing this to a playmate or to you or your husband. It is a great moment to be able to start teaching her about being considerate of others and caring about others' feelings. Don't punish her because she isn't doing anything "wrong" she is just being a little girl...and reacting to the "funny" reactions of the animals and of you!!!
When my daughter was little, mistreating the animals was grounds for immediate time-out and withdrawal of privileges, including the privilege of playing with the animals.
I didn't remove the animals from the room, I removed her. It didn't take long for her to figure out that if she didn't treat the animals nicely, she got to sit by herself on her bed with nothing to do and no one to play with, and it was no fun.
This is more than likely just a phase. My 4 1/2 year old daughter was terrible with our dog when she was younger but she loves him and is super sweet with him now. We have a huge Basset Hound and when my daughter was 2 she would hit him, kick him, pull his tail, step on him, throw things at him and ram her big push toys into him. Some days she was after him nonstop and other days she didn't pay much attention to him at all. We repeatedly had to remove her from the situation, put our dog in another room to give him some peace and take toys away when she wasn't nice. Thank goodness he is a very gentle dog and he has always been very patient with her. Just keep doing what you're doing and your daughter will eventually learn that it's not nice to treat the dogs that way. Also, make sure to never leave her alone in the room with the animals until she learns how to behave around them. You never know what an animal, even a sweet and gentle one, will do when they feel threatened. Good luck and just be patient.
I think she will out grow this phase. My daughter who is amost 2 has days like this with the dog and cat. The cat seems to like it at first then; not so much! I have to distract her when her chasing and "loving" get old to the animals!! If it is constant; you could put up a baby gate and put the dogs in a room for a few hours to give them a break.
No one should have to endure getting physically mistreated...not people nor animals! Very sad to me that people think due to age it should be permitted. Some toddlers take delight in being mean (ex: biting, hiting), but this is unacceptable whether the victim is a person or an animal and should not be tollerated under any circumstance.
In my belief this is just a normal thing 2 yr. olds do. Both of my girls did it and my grandkids have done it..but as long as there is no harm inflicted on the animal then i believe it is normal..My grandson use to do it to my cat. The cat scratched him, he cried, we cleaned it and 5 mins. later he was after the cat again..I call it torture, but they call it fun..I stopped it by putting the cat in another room while he was there, for her peace of mind..after a few times he actually stopped tormenting her and tried to make friends with her..but by that time she decided forget you! As for my dogs when the kids were inside the dogs were out and then vice-versa..but they weren't as bad with the dogs as they were with the cat.. the dogs actually were faster than the cat and would haul butt thinking he wanted to play..so I would give him a ball and he would throw it. The dog would get it and he would have to chase the dog to get it back cuz she wasn't giving it to him..eventually he got tired of that and just basiclly left all my critters alone..
I have two sweet girls and they BOTH did the same things when they were younger. I don't know why kids do this but my kids grew out of it and are animal lovers. I'm NOT saying it's OK for kids to harm animals (calm down PETA :)
My 4 year old still chases around the dog, she thinks it's funny but I can tell the dog doesn't like it. Its embarrassing but she did hit the dog when she was younger (not hard but still). My oldest daughter used to chase the dog around with a toy shopping cart, dog hated it. Bottom line, its entertainment for them and it's like a living toy to them at that age.
I am sure you are a great mom, but my child did it when she was a little bored of her toys and was waiting for me, for dinner, for something.
You need to treat it like any unacceptable behavior and discipline her with a time out. Yes, I have spanked my child but I think spanking a child to prevent them from possibly hitting an animal might be sending an oxymoron message. Just a thought.
Your daughter needs to learn to leave the animals alone immediately. I am amazed that one of them has not turned on her and bitten her. Now that would be a hard lesson to learn. Remove her from the situation. She will eventually learn if you persist. Good luck.
L.
I'm sure she is doing it because it's fun and she gets a reaction. 2.5 is not too young for time outs though, so if you tell her no and she keeps it up, give her a time out. 1 warning and then a 2 minute time out. High chairs work great for time outs with toddlers, and then she will get the idea quick that it's not OK to drive the pets nuts.
Also teach her "nice" instead of slapping the pet, show her how to pet the animal nicely and that the animal is "soft".
It's definitely normal behavior but that doesn't mean you have to let it continue. Good luck!
I remember years and years ago my oldest son was in a small walker (don't freak out, he survived). He would chase my folk's dog around till she got tired of him. She would go under the dining room table. When he followed her the walker would get caught on the legs of the table and then the dog would calmly walk off and leave him stuck. We thought it was hilarious. Eventually the fun wore off and he would leave the dog alone.
