2 Yr Old Regressing a Little Before Baby Is Born...

Ignore it. My 2.5 year old did the same thing before and after the baby was born. The best thing to do is to continue to show her the benefits of being the big girl and then just ignore it. It gets a lot harder once the baby is born so save up for then.

I didn't deal with this age separation - My kids are almost 4 years apart. But I don't think she is doing anything I would really characterize as regression. She is barely two - they are really little babies until they turn four. I wouldn't expect too much from her - she is behaving like a two-year old. My kids both "regress" sometimes and has nothing to do with a sibling or even a major life change. They are little adults and sometimes,like us, they need more attention or affection and this sort of thing is how they get it. My oldest did it before I was ever pregnant and still does from time to time. It is simply their way of checking-in to make sure they still have your attention. She would be doing this anyway, it just so happens there is a baby coming.

However, that does not mean that she is not feeling insecure. She probably isn't making any sort of direct conection yet between the baby and her feelings. She can't really comprehend what having another baby means. I mean, in some ways, you don't really comprehend it either :) However, she can sense the anticipationa and excitement. She gets those feelings by osmosis from you. She isn't capable of interpreting them, and it freaks her out, so she may be looking to know she still has your attention and looking for security. She is sort of saying, "Mommy, are you taking care of me?"

After the baby, I would make sure you make some daily focused time for her. Preferably, keep up some part of your routine with her. For instance, if you always put her to bed, or you always make her breakfast, try to do that and especially just you two, without the baby. Even if it is just that you do the bedtime routine everynight, that 30 minutes alone with her (no baby) will mean so much to her. My daughter is five now, and she is very good at saying, "Mom, I want alone cuddles with you." Your daughter can't say that, but she will still feel it. I really tend to feel bad for them, because it must be so frustrating not being able ot express what you need.

Another piece of advice: When she comes to meet the baby at the hospital. make sure you are NOT holding the baby. Let her come in and see you (HER Mommy) waiting for her and give her a big cuddle. Then, bring the baby over. Let her feel that she is still number one with you and that this interloper is not taking her spot.

I felt (and still feel) a lot of physical demands since my second child was born. You hold a newborn so much, and especially if you are nursing, it is so draining, no matter how good the baby is. It is hard then to have an older ohild climb all over you at the same time. As much as you kind of have to tough it out, make sure you have some plans to free yourself of the kids for a little while each day, so that when you are covered in kids, you can enjoy it.

Congrats, enjoy them!

I am a SAHM with a 17 month old and a baby due in November and my mother warned me that toddlers revert to baby behavior when a new baby comes into the picture. I also remember when I was a preschool teacher for two year olds we had alot of babies born every year and the kids never liked it much, they would always avoid talking about their new brothers or sisters and start acting out a bit more for attention. Even the toddlers who at first where excited about the new sibling, when the baby arrives they usually all got a bit jealous and started acting less disciplined. My mom says that we all started asking for bottles and to be picked up all the time after our siblings where born, and even potty training went backwards. I have been worrying about this myself and look forward to reading responses. Good luck and congratulations!

I wouldn't say she's regressing. It could be partly related to the impending birth of her brother, but could also be part of her age, especially if she's "growing up" is other ways (potty training, etc).

I suggest taking as much time as you can over the next 5 weeks to do special things with her and perhaps pick up some special gifts for when the baby is born. Maybe get some books about being a big sister.

Hi

This is normal behaviour , she is just making sure that you still love her. My eldest regressed with potty training by having accidents when my 2nd was born , and when the 3rd was born my 2nd became very clingy and started acting and talking like a baby. It only lasted a few weeks. You just need to reassure her that you still love her and once baby is here make sure you put aside some time where it is just the 2 of you.

Good luck

K.

Just love on her. You'll miss the one-on-one time with her and time goes by too fast! My oldest daughter did the same thing and she grew out of it pretty quickly.

My 1st waited until after the new baby to start regressing....I found that the more I didn't make a big deal of it, the less of an issue it became. They're just looking for attention that previously was ALLLLL there's. They want to make sure Mommy will still be there for them when it's not just them. Try to remember that it's only temporary and just let it go.....The more you make of it, the more it'll become :-) Good luck!

My daughter was 2-1/2 when my son was born. I found a little of both worked well. I definitely made sure I gave her as much extra attention and cuddling as I was able to (whether she acted like she was a "baby" or not). But I also reminded her of her "big girl" status too. I had to find a balance.

Also, I found drawing the line between really being a baby and pretending to be a baby worked well. I reminded her she was a big girl, but we could play a game and PRETEND she was a baby. Then I'd hold her in my lap, "feed" her, pretend to change her diaper, etc. It was just silly enough to be fun for her and gave her a little of what she needed.

Good luck with your new little one (and your big one)! :-)
B.

I'm a mom of three boys. When my second was born, I clearly remember my first saying "Mama, I'm a little bit a big boy and a little bit a baby". He was 25 months old. It just about broke my heart but also reminded me that he was exactly right... he was both. If you can keep that in mind, your good mommy instincts will tell you what to do to keep her happy, even if it means indulging some "baby" behavior and simultaneously expecting the "big girl" behavior that she is capable of.

~m

Hi J.,
What you're experiencing with your daughter is completely normal. My children became a lot more clingy and over the top before a sibling was born. They had different ways of expressing their feelings: bed-wetting, tantrums, not cooperating even over little things. I think kids know when they're about to get "displaced" so they will be extra sensitive. The best thing you can do is pour on the love. Give her extra attention and remind her how she's mommy's special girl. After the baby is born, continue to spend that extra time and engage her in the process of helping out with little brother.
Don't worry, she'll get through this rough patch. Take care and best wishes for a smooth delivery and post-partum recovery.
V. C. Merriweather

Your two year old sounds like she is regressing fromgrowing more independent, not the new baby. She's a little insecure about being the "big" girl and still needing you to take care of her needs. Keep up what you're doing - that is, responding to her need to be "cared for" by regressing and maintaining the expectations that she IS capable and can do more "growing up" things than before. Listen carefully to how your "gut"/ or "mom instincts" tell you for when to "baby" her and when to support more independent behavior on your daughter's part...You'll need to know what "gut" feeling is what for when the baby is here and she regresses from growing up or regresses from jealousy of baby attention. That way, when it's baby attention, you can redirect her behavior to get your attention with helpful behavior (don't call it "growing" or "big"), or, when it's "security for growing more independent"; respond with "mommy support" to let her know you're still with her even though she can do 'this part' alone...
hope this helps. Have fun, and keep telling yourself and your daughter how terrific you both are!

I agree that it's likely just be her age...my son is three and will go a few weeks at a time where he does things like that, and then he'll do something like go to gymnastics camp 4 days in a row by himself and tell me "you can go now mom!" with a huge grin on his face. So I'm saying that it's normal behavior, especially with the potty training and sleeping and you're doing GREAT! As long as kids know you love them and are there for them they can handle almost anything. As info, when I potty trained my son I kept telling him how grown up he was and we did things to support that, like getting his own library card, letting him pick out some fruit to get at the grocery store, etc. I bet that would go far with your daughter when the baby come :) Hugs, D.

I have a 2 1/2-year-old and 1-year-old twins, and it's definitely been a roller coaster! I agree that she could be "regressing" regardless of whether or not there were a new baby coming, and that she's still a baby herself and it's not really a regression at all. Give her what she's asking for, and more. Cuddles, you-time, spontaneous outpourings of affection, whatever you can. Build her up now, while you can, because it's simply not going to be as possible once the new baby is here and you (yes, you, as much as she) need her to feel secure and connected to you in order to weather what's coming. Don't worry about it, but don't ignore it. Indulge it.

I don't mean spoil her or enable her to regress. I'm not saying indulge tantrums or inappropriate behavior, but there's nothing inappropriate about a 2-year-old wanting confirmation that she's still your baby. And if you give her a little more of that comfort even when she's not asking for it, you'll build a buffer that will cradle her later, when you can't.

Good luck. Finding balance is always hard. But I find it's better to err on the side of love. :)